Though not on the scale (or huge budget) of Digital Playground's hit "Pirates" porn films, this new British throwback to Hollywood serials is terrific entertainment for a change. Its title conjures up '60s Hammer classics, but the uncredited tribute is rather to the quirkiest of British XXX studios, Bluebird Films.
Dick Bush delivers very interesting story set-ups for each of eight episodes of a serial, strung together as feature film. I would guesstimate that the 4-1/2 hour opus would yield just under an hour of hard-R/soft-X material if shorn of its explicit humping.
Chief revelation is Danny D in the title role, playing Victor Frankenstein circa early 20th Century, in his lab eager to reanimate his dead wife Elizabeth (Tina Kay). Sienna Day as Wendy dominates the first episode (with anal sex emphasized), arriving with Peter Pan (Ryan Ryder) when Vic accidentally opens a portal to Neverland. Sex ensues because Peter has lost his mojo and can't fly, a condition Wendy seeks to cure by their return to their childhood bedroom where he dons his snazzy green leather outfit, sprinkles him with fairy dust and humps him silly until he's literally flying.
Captain Hook's daughter (Jasmine Jae), also named Hook, arrives through the portal with an Evil Sprite (wearing black patch) played by the film's secret weapon Sophia Knight in a dual role battling with herself as Tinker Bell. Leading a flotilla of pirate ships, Hook is intent on invading and conquering Earth.
Frankenstein organizes a league of heroes to defend the planet and defeat Hook, and writer-director Bush's intentions to mimic the currently successful Marvel's "The Avengers" becomes clear. First in line to assist him is Barbara Von Helsing, played by Franceska Jaimes as the famous vampire hunter, with the odd touch of Lewis Carroll's Alice (played by American porn star Mia Malkova) as her assistant, carrying a croquet mallet to bean baddies with, instead of Thor's hammer. Jaimes and Alice free from bondage and service sexually a vampire's hostage played by big-dicked Christian Clay. Lest this be too traditional, Jaimes shows off in this scene and again in Episode Five her squirting ability, obviously a Golden Shower of urine. There's also some decent gore for the fans as a baddie is decapitated with decent SPFX (film features nice visual, makeup and physical effects between sex scenes in "Pirates" tradition, making it seem at times like a real movie).
After namedropping Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos, third episode introduces Jasmine Webb, perhaps Britain's top Black porn star, as Jane Porter, a screwy combination of Indiana Jones and Lara Croft. She does battle with the Big White Ape, a strange looking porn actor named Rob Diesel, who is covered with tattoos almost as interesting as the femme star of TV's "Blindspot" and has such huge muscles that they make his big dick look smaller than it is. As usual, Webb delivers quality mixed-combo action with the big lug.
Hook battles our heroes in the next episode, with Tinker Bell a tiny but powerful warrior in this incarnation. It's time for our star Dr. Frankenstein to get down, and Danny D rises to the occasion, humping Jae as Hook through the bars of her cell where he's imprisoned her in his lab. She uses her hook to guide his dick to her mouth, and biggest surprise for me is how much (apart from the huge cock) Danny resembles the iconic British star of the '60s Tom Courtenay given a chance to do some actual acting here.
Hook bamboozles Frankenstein into a mad attempt to bring back his bride by transplanting Peter Pan's heart into her chest -Pete having been offed by (actor Ryder's real-life wife) Hook in an earlier episode. Surprisingly this works, but wife Elizabeth comes back as a deranged monster, wreaking havoc.
Tinker Bell is understandably angered at this desecration of Pan's body, and goes on the rampage, emitting a memorable line: "You don't want to f*ck with this fairy!". Van Helsing seduces the full-sized T.B. and they have a solid lesbian scene & Golden Shower all over game trouper Sophia Knight's face.
Jane Porter shows up with the White Ape in tow to help out, successfully hunting down the bride of Frankenstein. The big lug has a violent sex scene in a barn with Mrs. Frankenstein, in which she whips his posterior with her belt as he humps her.
For video streamers, the highlight is Episode Seven, an uncredited tribute to Bluebird Films and its zany XXX content. While Bush stages a chintzy night battle between the League and Hook's pirates, Alice is zapped by Hook, sending her dreamlike to Wonderland and the famous Mad Hatter's tea party. Danny D appears, and is full of energy, as the Hatter, with Jasmine Jae as his pal the March Hare, playing that part topless with her huge fake breasts dominating the frame.
Tina Kay is also at the party, with potent three-way sex in which DD's dick looks bigger than ever. He delivers a particularly extreme facial for Jae in a very wacky but highly erotic scene, reminiscent of numerous Bluebird videos: "Secret Garden" and Stacey Saran in both,"Who Stole Roger Rabbit" and "Alice".
Finale has Alice returning for more of the desultory battle in which Hook is finally defeated. Tinker Bell has been critically injured, and to save her, Frankenstein removes Peter Pan's heart from his wife's breast and transplants it into Tinker Bell, since as Elizabeth has movingly told him "My heart belongs to someone else".
Picture ends with a revived Peter Pan and Wendy headed "second to the right, straight on till morning" into the sky, but with an end title threatening "The League of Frankenstein will return". Now all we need is Brit porn's equivalent of Daniel Craig.
Dick Bush delivers very interesting story set-ups for each of eight episodes of a serial, strung together as feature film. I would guesstimate that the 4-1/2 hour opus would yield just under an hour of hard-R/soft-X material if shorn of its explicit humping.
Chief revelation is Danny D in the title role, playing Victor Frankenstein circa early 20th Century, in his lab eager to reanimate his dead wife Elizabeth (Tina Kay). Sienna Day as Wendy dominates the first episode (with anal sex emphasized), arriving with Peter Pan (Ryan Ryder) when Vic accidentally opens a portal to Neverland. Sex ensues because Peter has lost his mojo and can't fly, a condition Wendy seeks to cure by their return to their childhood bedroom where he dons his snazzy green leather outfit, sprinkles him with fairy dust and humps him silly until he's literally flying.
Captain Hook's daughter (Jasmine Jae), also named Hook, arrives through the portal with an Evil Sprite (wearing black patch) played by the film's secret weapon Sophia Knight in a dual role battling with herself as Tinker Bell. Leading a flotilla of pirate ships, Hook is intent on invading and conquering Earth.
Frankenstein organizes a league of heroes to defend the planet and defeat Hook, and writer-director Bush's intentions to mimic the currently successful Marvel's "The Avengers" becomes clear. First in line to assist him is Barbara Von Helsing, played by Franceska Jaimes as the famous vampire hunter, with the odd touch of Lewis Carroll's Alice (played by American porn star Mia Malkova) as her assistant, carrying a croquet mallet to bean baddies with, instead of Thor's hammer. Jaimes and Alice free from bondage and service sexually a vampire's hostage played by big-dicked Christian Clay. Lest this be too traditional, Jaimes shows off in this scene and again in Episode Five her squirting ability, obviously a Golden Shower of urine. There's also some decent gore for the fans as a baddie is decapitated with decent SPFX (film features nice visual, makeup and physical effects between sex scenes in "Pirates" tradition, making it seem at times like a real movie).
After namedropping Lovecraft's Cthulhu Mythos, third episode introduces Jasmine Webb, perhaps Britain's top Black porn star, as Jane Porter, a screwy combination of Indiana Jones and Lara Croft. She does battle with the Big White Ape, a strange looking porn actor named Rob Diesel, who is covered with tattoos almost as interesting as the femme star of TV's "Blindspot" and has such huge muscles that they make his big dick look smaller than it is. As usual, Webb delivers quality mixed-combo action with the big lug.
Hook battles our heroes in the next episode, with Tinker Bell a tiny but powerful warrior in this incarnation. It's time for our star Dr. Frankenstein to get down, and Danny D rises to the occasion, humping Jae as Hook through the bars of her cell where he's imprisoned her in his lab. She uses her hook to guide his dick to her mouth, and biggest surprise for me is how much (apart from the huge cock) Danny resembles the iconic British star of the '60s Tom Courtenay given a chance to do some actual acting here.
Hook bamboozles Frankenstein into a mad attempt to bring back his bride by transplanting Peter Pan's heart into her chest -Pete having been offed by (actor Ryder's real-life wife) Hook in an earlier episode. Surprisingly this works, but wife Elizabeth comes back as a deranged monster, wreaking havoc.
Tinker Bell is understandably angered at this desecration of Pan's body, and goes on the rampage, emitting a memorable line: "You don't want to f*ck with this fairy!". Van Helsing seduces the full-sized T.B. and they have a solid lesbian scene & Golden Shower all over game trouper Sophia Knight's face.
Jane Porter shows up with the White Ape in tow to help out, successfully hunting down the bride of Frankenstein. The big lug has a violent sex scene in a barn with Mrs. Frankenstein, in which she whips his posterior with her belt as he humps her.
For video streamers, the highlight is Episode Seven, an uncredited tribute to Bluebird Films and its zany XXX content. While Bush stages a chintzy night battle between the League and Hook's pirates, Alice is zapped by Hook, sending her dreamlike to Wonderland and the famous Mad Hatter's tea party. Danny D appears, and is full of energy, as the Hatter, with Jasmine Jae as his pal the March Hare, playing that part topless with her huge fake breasts dominating the frame.
Tina Kay is also at the party, with potent three-way sex in which DD's dick looks bigger than ever. He delivers a particularly extreme facial for Jae in a very wacky but highly erotic scene, reminiscent of numerous Bluebird videos: "Secret Garden" and Stacey Saran in both,"Who Stole Roger Rabbit" and "Alice".
Finale has Alice returning for more of the desultory battle in which Hook is finally defeated. Tinker Bell has been critically injured, and to save her, Frankenstein removes Peter Pan's heart from his wife's breast and transplants it into Tinker Bell, since as Elizabeth has movingly told him "My heart belongs to someone else".
Picture ends with a revived Peter Pan and Wendy headed "second to the right, straight on till morning" into the sky, but with an end title threatening "The League of Frankenstein will return". Now all we need is Brit porn's equivalent of Daniel Craig.