- [first lines]
- Gortimer Gibbon: [narrating] The first day of school is a fresh start, a chance to redefine yourself. Do you try a different look, start a new trend or just follow one? Do you try to stand out or look for ways to blend in, or stick with what works - or, at least, what used to work.
- Mr. Renshaw: Eighth grade. *Eighth* grade. Last year, you were just a bunch of kids. If you behaved immaturely, your teachers would say, "Well, what do you expect from a seventh grader?" Things are different this year. Most of you are teenagers - we expect more from you. *I* expect more from you. I'm Mr. Renshaw. Welcome to Eighth Grade *Honors* Social Studies.
- [Ranger opens his locker, which is packed with books, food and other objects]
- Mel Fuller: You've only had this locker for an hour and a half.
- Ranger Bowen: You know my motto.
- Mel Fuller: Ninjas are everywhere?
- Gortimer Gibbon: When in doubt... tacos?
- Ranger Bowen: Be ready for anything. For example, I have 500 water balloons just for Waterloo.
- Gortimer Gibbon: I can't wait. This water balloon fight is going to go down in history!
- Mel Fuller: Well, if we want this water balloon fight to be truly historic, we're going to need a force multiplier.
- Ranger Bowen: Something that makes the other kids wet themselves - with their own balloons.
- Gortimer Gibbon: Well, then we're going to need bigger splashes, longer range - a catapult. You know, the one with the swinging thing at the bottom.
- Mel Fuller: That's a trebuchet, which would be perfect. We could lob balloons all the way across the field.
- Ranger Bowen: Medieval! I like it - but wouldn't we run out of ammo too fast?
- Mel Fuller: One problem at a time. First we need to figure out if we can actually build it. My place after school - we'll talk blueprints.