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François Cluzet and Omar Sy in The Intouchables (2011)

Quotes

The Intouchables

Edit
  • Philippe: My true disability is not having to be in a wheel chair. It's having to be without her.
  • Driss: Where do you find a paraplegic?
  • Philippe: I don't know.
  • Driss: Where you leave him.
  • Philippe: Tell me Driss, why do you think people are interested in art?
  • Driss: I don't know, it's a business?
  • Philippe: No. That's because it's the only thing one leaves behind
  • Philippe: [Driss shaves François beard turning into a weird mustache] Oh, it's awful.
  • [moments later, it's turned into a old-fashioned mustache]
  • Philippe: I look like my grandpa.
  • Driss: Okay. Let me shave the rest off.
  • Philippe: [François now has a Hitler mustache] No, come on.
  • Driss: That's not funny, no?
  • Philippe: Don't you mean "nein"?
  • [does a German gibberish, they both laugh later on]
  • [Orchestra plays next symphony]
  • Driss: Oh I know this one. Everyone know it. Of course.
  • [mockingly]
  • Driss: You have reached the Paris unemployment agency. All our lines are currently busy. The estimated waiting time is two years.
  • Driss: 100 euros says I can lose them.
  • Philippe: You're on.
  • Driss: I'm not going in there, even you! I'm not gonna lead you in the back like a horse.
  • Driss: [after listening to classical music] We listened to your classics. Now it's time to listen to mine.
  • [plays Earth Wind & Fire]
  • Philippe: Hope well and have well.
  • Driss: Guys from the north drink so much, they're all beating their ladies. She'll see there's no risk with you.
  • [Philippe chuckles]
  • Driss: It's not about being ready. I do not do that. I don't empty a stranger's butt. I don't even empty a friend's butt. I usually don't empty butts. It's a matter of principles.
  • Driss: What a seducer! He's epistoling like a boss.
  • Driss: So if you have red ears, it means you're turned on?
  • Philippe: That's it. Sometimes I even wake up with hard lobes.
  • [Both laugh]
  • Driss: Both of them?
  • [They laugh even harder]
  • [Orchestra plays next symphony]
  • Driss: Isn't it Tom and Jerry?
  • Philippe: [resisting to laugh] Tom and Jerry. What a rascal. Help.
  • Philippe: [teasing] What's the matter, you're dealing with the stockings, you have a cute little earring, I think it's coherent.
  • Driss: Easy on the sass, alright.
  • [Philippe laughs]
  • [while Driss is shaving Philippe, the razor near his jugular]
  • Philippe: A quick cut would settle it.
  • Driss: You're in great shape. I love it.
  • [repeated line]
  • Driss: She got the hots for me.
  • Driss: Can't the motivation sign for you?
  • Philippe: No no no, Magalie can't do that.
  • Driss: It's a shame. She could have dropped in her number as well.
  • Driss: How about a hooker file?
  • [He smiles. Philippe looks unimpressed]
  • Driss: [in hysterics at the opera] It's a tree! It's a singing tree! Ha ha ha ha! It's German! He's singing in German!
  • Driss: You can't buy this crap! It's not possible.
  • Philippe: It's possibe.
  • Driss: The guy wants 30 rand for a nosebleed!
  • Philippe: Tell me, Driss, why are people interested in art?
  • Driss: It's all business , I guess.
  • Philippe: No. It's the trace of our passage on this earth.
  • Bastien - dit le Plumeau: Hi. Where can I find a beer?
  • Driss: How about in your wig?
  • [first lines]
  • Driss: [while driving] Outta the way.
  • [repeated line]
  • Elisa: Leave me alone.

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François Cluzet and Omar Sy in The Intouchables (2011)
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