What to Do with the Dead Kaiju?

How do you deal with/dispose of/profit from the tons of rotting flesh that is a dead kaiju? This seems a 'can't-miss' comic premise (at least for Gojira lovers like me) but the film is an unfunny bore. Even by the relatively lax standards of kaiju-eiga, nothing in the story makes sense (notably the ending) and as a parody of the genre, the film goes nowhere. The bulk of the humour (such as it is) comes from a bunch of hammy actors satirising Japanese bureaucrats bickering over who is responsible for dealing with the colossal carrion and from some attempts at over-the-top gross-out comedy involving bursting blisters. Watched on a plane with English subtitles (but I doubt that it would be better on a big screen in Japanese). For a superior treatment of a similar premise, consider reading J. G. Ballard's short story 'The Drowned Giant'.

Right, well the concept idea behind this 2022 Japanese movie titled "What to Do with the Dead Kaiju?" was pretty interesting, I will say that much. And it was initially also that which drew me in, plus the fact that it was an Asian movie I hadn't already seen.

I really liked the concept idea here, especially after having watched so many Japanese Kaiju movies through the years, and the synopsis sounded rather interesting.

However, I have to say that I am a bit impressed with how writer and director Satoshi Miki could manage to put together such a pointless movie as "What to Do with the Dead Kaiju?" actually turned out to be. Talk about dropping the ball and failing to cash in on the golden opportunity right at the feet.

The storyline in the movie was rather unappealing and just felt sluggish, clumsy and generally poorly executed and brought to the screen in a very disappointing manner. I failed to find much of anything worthwhile as the narrative trotted on in a very monotonous pace. And I ended up giving up on the movie about two-thirds through the ordeal.

The acting performances in the movie were fair enough, but the character gallery was rather unappealing and dull. And that just didn't do much to bring entertainment to the screen.

Visually then "What to Do with the Dead Kaiju?" was okay. The CGI rendering of the Kaiju was a bit too dubious for my liking, and resembled leftover CGI from the early 2000s.

I have no plans of returning to writer and director Satoshi Miki's 2022 movie to finish watching it, simply because the storyline failed to entertainment, and I didn't care one bit about the characters.

My rating of "What to Do with the Dead Kaiju?" lands on a four out of ten stars.

Satoshi Miki epitomized what it means to have too much and not enough at same time. Despite some jabs at self-governance and mass hysteria, this satire felt forced most of the times. Few redeemed qualities in final act might be a little too late.