Justin Long credited as playing...
Alvin
- Alvin: Si, don't make me have to kiss you because I'll do it! I don't care! Here come the lips! Makeout train is leaving the station! Toot toot!
- Alvin, Simon: [answer the phone] Hello?
- Dave: Boys, it's me.
- Simon: DAVE!
- Alvin: Dave, as in "Dave"?
- [the nurse is holding Dave's phone for him to talk into in his hospital room in Paris]
- Dave: Well, I guess since you answered the phone, you haven't burned down the house yet.
- [smiles]
- Alvin: Have a little faith, Dave!
- Theodore: Yeah!
- [falls off the pot rack]
- Theodore: Mayday!
- [lands on a pan with too much force, which crashes to the floor]
- Dave: [his smile fades] What was that?
- Simon: [whispers to Alvin] Don't stress him out.
- Alvin: Uh, that was Aunt Jackie. Yeah. She's making us a zesty five-course meal.
- [chuckles]
- Dave: Really? Well, can I talk to her?
- Theodore: She's practicing her pole dancing.
- [Alvin and Simon look at each other, incredulous, and Theodore just shrugs, not knowing what he said.]
- Dave: Pole dancing? What happened to making dinner? Guys, what's going on?
- Alvin: Gotta go, Dave!
- Dave: Alvin, I'm not kidding.
- Alvin: Feel better!
- Dave: ALVIII-!
- Alvin: [hangs up, cutting Dave off] Yep, nobody does that better than him.
- Alvin: [pretends to get hit in the cheek by Dr. Rubin's kiss] Right back at ya, Dr. Rubes!
- [blows a kiss back at Dr. Rubin]
- Dr. Rubin: [shocked that the Chipmunks noticed her tattoo of them] Promise me that you won't say anything. A principal has a certain image to uphold, and if the faculty ever found out about this, I could-
- [laughs excitedly and bangs on her desk]
- Dr. Rubin: I just cannot believe that you're actually sitting in my office! I have all of your CDs. I even went to see you last year in Denver, that's where I got this. It was my birthday, and I was like, "Ooh, the Chipmunks!" So, what do you say, will you represent our school?
- Alvin: Honestly, suspension still sounds pretty good to me.
- Alvin: [as Robert DeNiro] You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? I'm the only one here, so you must be talking to me.
- Alvin: You'll never take me! I'm not going anywhere without Da-
- [the doctor injects him with sedative, making him go loopy]
- Alvin: -aaaaaydream believer and a homecoming queen
- [drops onto the bed, out cold]
- Doctor: I hope for your sake he stays asleep for the entire flight.
- Simon: Simon: Maybe we should give him another shot, just to be sure.
- [realizes he's in a bedpan and gasps]
- Simon: Ugh.
- Alvin: Dave, just think how much you'd miss us if there were six of us.
- Dave: Alvin, what did you say?
- Alvin: Well, the Chipettes needed a place to crash, right? So I said that you said they could stay with us as long as they needed to.
- Dave: Alvin...
- Alvin: Ok! This one's for Dave! Everybody shake what your mama gave ya! Whoo!
- Dave: Alvin, take it easy out there. You gotta share the spotlight.
- Alvin: You got it, Dave!
- [Alvin starts to return to the stage, but Dave steps on his guitar cable, stopping him in his tracks.]
- Alvin: [understandably annoyed] Uh, DAAAVE?
- Dave: I'm serious, Alvin. This is a charity benefit. It's not all about you.
- Alvin: Sorry Dave, I can't hear you over the thousands of fans screaming my name!
- [Alvin unplugs his guitar and bounds back to the stage. Perhaps he should have invested in a wireless system.]