- Papi: She's... gone. Wake up mi corazon. It's me... your Popi. Speak to me. Fill my ears with your beautiful voice. Without you, the sun will have no warmth... the flowers, no beauty. Cloe, my tail will have no wag. Come back to Beverly Hills with me, and I will tend your garden forever. Your love is the rain that falls upon my earth.
- Chloe: Don't stop now, it's just getting good!
- [from teaser]
- Papi: [voice over] My name is Papi. I am descended from an ancient line of proud warriors. My ancestors went into battle, alongside Aztec soldiers. Today, we move within the inner circles of the wealthiest and most powerful people on the planet. Who am I? The question is... *What* am I?
- [pops out of doggie hatch on the huge door of an Aztec temple]
- Papi: I'm a Chihuahua!
- [growls slyly]
- Delgado: [to Chloe] Look, if you're worth something, they'll ransom you, and if they ransom you, they won't fight you, so I guess you're safe.
- Delta: [Rachel has poured some water in the dogs' glasses] Don't worry Chloe, Viv'll be back before you know it.
- Bimini: Rachel doesn't look so bad.
- Chloe: [Chloe scoffs] You don't know the half of it!
- Blair: [watching the dogs sit in their lounge chairs in their little bikinis] They all look so cute in their little outfits!
- Rachel Ashe Lynn: You didn't have to dress her. She's so picky!
- Angela: Uh, Rach? You're talking about a Chihuahua.
- Rachel Ashe Lynn: She's not just *any* Chihuahua, Angela! She's a bossy, arrogant, manipulative Beverly Hills Chihuahua.
- Chloe: [about Rachel] She has no direction, she can't keep a job, she's never on time; I'm going to be late to all my appointments!
- Rachel Ashe Lynn: [about Chloe] And don't even get me started on her schedule! Shiatsu massages, doggy birthday parties, couture fittings! I have to change her outfit four times a day!
- Chloe: [about Rachel] I mean, look at her!
- Chloe, Rachel Ashe Lynn: [in unison, about each other] She's so...
- Chloe: [about Rachel, ending her sentence] Irresponsible!
- Rachel Ashe Lynn: [about Chloe, ending her sentence] Spoiled!
- Chloe: [barking] Woof!
- Chloe, Rachel Ashe Lynn: [about each other] She is so...
- Chloe: Irresponsible!
- Rachel Ashe Lynn: Spoiled!
- Delgado: [hears El Diablo howling] Hold up a second.
- Chloe: Uh, what's that sound?
- Delgado: Hmm. Hold your breath.
- [tosses Chloe into the dirty water pit]
- Chloe: Ew! What did you do that for?
- Delgado: El Diablo's got your scent.
- Chloe: [shakes off water] Well, of course he does. It's Chanel #5.
- Delgado: Congratulations
- Chloe: Now I've lost another bootie and I stink.
- Delgado: I don't smell anything.
- Chloe: Are you kidding? I smell like a wet dog.
- Delgado: You are a wet dog.
- [after Delgado tackles El Diablo]
- Delgado: It's over, Diablo! It is *over*! You took everything from me. And now, we're even.
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