Family Guy (TV Series)

Lois Kills Stewie (2007)

Seth MacFarlane: Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin, Glenn Quagmire, Stan Smith, Tom Tucker, Jafar, Rob Schneider's Slave, Rob Schneider

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Peter has just killed Stewie] 

  Peter Griffin : It's just been revoked!

  Brian Griffin : Uh, Peter, he didn't really set you up for that Lethal Weapon line. It... it doesn't really work here.

  Peter Griffin : Oh. I'll have what she's having!

  Brian Griffin : That's... better?

• [Stan Smith and Avery Bullock from "American Dad!" confront Brian and Stewie after Stewie gains control of the world's power grid] 

  Stewie Griffin : I'd drop the gun if I were you, Joe.

  Stan Smith : What? It's Stan.

  Stewie Griffin : Oh, sorry, you look sorta like someone from... Anyway, I'd drop the gun if I were you. I now control the entire planet's power grid. And unless you want me to send you all back to the dark ages, you'll do exactly as I say.

  [Realizing they have no choice, Stan and Bullock lower their guns] 

  Avery Bullock : What are your demands?

• [Stewie has just finished singing] 

  Simon Cowell : Stewie, what the hell was that?

  Stewie Griffin : That was, uh, "Lost in Your Eyes" by Debbie Gibson.

  Simon Cowell : One of the worst I've ever heard.

  Stewie Griffin : Okay.

  Simon Cowell : Stewie, you shouldn't actually be alive you sniveling little creep. I hate you so much I want to shoot you in your face.

  Stewie Griffin : All right.

  Paula Abdul : Honey, I liked you but you're just not right for *this* competition.

  Randy Jackson : Yo, dawg I gotta tell you from me man. That was not even half good dude. You can't sing. What are you doing, Stewie?

  [cut to Stewie leaving in tears] 

  Stewie Griffin : I don't even care! They don't know what they's talkin' about! Next time they hears about me they's gonna be like, "We was wrong about Stewie!" Cause I's gonna be huge! I's gonna be bigger than every one of all y'alls!

• Stewie Griffin : Anyone who uses the terms, "irregardless", "a whole 'nother", or "all of the sudden" shall be sent to a work camp.

• Stewie Griffin : Go away, you paper clip! No one likes you!

• Stewie Griffin : This is it, Brian. My plans for world domination are about to come to fruition.

• Stewie Griffin : Greetings, loyal minions!

• Stewie Griffin : Now! I have no doubt that perhaps there may exist some mild discontent among some of you at the recent changes I have implemented. Lest you be considering any sort of uprising, I warn you I am quite prepared to make an example of any undesirable elements. And don't think I don't know who you are!