Mark Hadlow credited as playing...
Dori • Bert Troll
- Dori: Mr. Gandalf, can't you do something about this deluge?
- Gandalf: It is raining, Master dwarf, and it will continue to rain until the rain is done. If you wish to change the weather of the world, you should find yourself another wizard.
- Bilbo Baggins: Are there any?
- Gandalf: What?
- Bilbo Baggins: Other wizards?
- Gandalf: There are five of us. The greatest of our order is Saruman the White. And then there are the two Blue Wizards... You know, I've quite forgotten their names.
- Bilbo Baggins: And the fifth?
- Gandalf: Well, that would be Radagast the Brown.
- Bilbo Baggins: Is he a great wizard, or is he more like you?
- Gandalf: Well, I think he is a very great wizard... in his own way. He's a gentle soul who prefers the company of animals for others. He keeps a watchful eye over the vast forest lands to the East, and a good thing too. For always evil will look to find a foothold in this world.
- [as the trolls are roasting half a dozen of the dwarves on a spit over a fire]
- Bilbo Baggins: Wait, wait! You are making a terrible mistake!
- Bert Troll: Eh?
- Dori: You can't reason with them, they're half-wits!
- Bofur: Half-wits? What does that make us?
- Bilbo Baggins: [Bilbo interrupts as Tom the troll about to eat Bombur] Uh... no, no, not... not that one, he... he's infected!
- William Troll: [taken aback] You what?
- Bilbo Baggins: Yes, he's got worms in his... tubes.
- Tom Troll: Ooh!
- [Tom throws down Bombur in disgust]
- Bilbo Baggins: In-in fact, they all have. They're infested with parasites, it's a terrible business, I wouldn't risk it, I really wouldn't.
- Oin: Parasites? Did he say parasites?
- Kili: Yeah, we don't have parasites!
- [to Bilbo]
- Kili: You have parasites!
- [Thorin realizes that Bilbo is trying to buy them time and kicks Kili, and the dwarves realize what Bilbo is doing]
- Oin: I've got parasites as big as my arm!
- Kili: Mine are the biggest parasites, I've got huge parasites!
- Nori: We're riddled!
- Ori: Yes, I'm riddled!
- Dori: Yes, we are, badly!
- Gandalf: The dawn will take you all!
- William Troll: Who's that?
- Bert Troll: No idea.
- Tom Troll: Can we eat him too?
- Bert Troll: I'm just saying, a little appreciation would be nice. 'Thank you very much, Bert.' 'Lovely stew, Bert.' How hard is that? Mmm. Just needs a sprinkle of squirrel dung