Rachel Weisz credited as playing...
Penelope
- Penelope Stamp: I think you're constipated, in your fucking soul... I think you might have a really big load of grumpy petrified poop up your soul's ass.
- Penelope Stamp: This was a story about a girl who could find infinite beauty in anything, any little thing, and even love the person she was trapped with. And i told myself this story until it became true. Now, did doing this help me escape a wasted life? Or did it blind me so I didn't want to escape it? I don't know, but either way I was the one telling my own story...
- Penelope Stamp: I don't know about "truths." A photograph is a secret about a secret. The more it tells, the less you know.
- Penelope Stamp: I collect hobbies. I see someone doing something I like, and I get books and learn how to do it.
- Bloom: Do you feel cheated?
- Penelope Stamp: The trick to not feeling cheated is to learn how to cheat.
- Bloom: How did you find me?
- Penelope Stamp: Bang Bang.
- Bloom: Bang Bang?
- Penelope Stamp: She gave me her cell number.
- Bloom: Bang Bang has a cell phone?
- Penelope Stamp: I know I'm pretending to be a smuggler ba ba ba... BUT what you don't know is that I'm a real smuggler because I tell it like I own it. You know what your problem is? You just gotta stop thinking and just enjoy the ride man.
- Penelope Stamp: I think a little real danger might suit me, so, uh, if you three want to join my smugglers gang, I'll uh, y'know, uh... consider it.
- [last lines]
- Penelope Stamp: He said to me, there's no such thing as an unwritten life. Just a badly written one.
- Bloom: Oh God.
- Penelope Stamp: I love you Bloom. You know what we're gonna do? We're gonna live. Like we're telling the best story in the whole world.
- Penelope Stamp: Are you ready?
- Bloom: [narrating] And Stephen said something else one. The perfect con is one where everyone involved gets just the thing they wanted.