The Simpsons (TV Series)
Cape Feare (1993)
Julie Kavner: Marge Simpson, Patty Bouvier, Selma Bouvier
Quotes
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Marge : You awful man! Stay away from my son!
Sideshow Bob : [menacing] Oh, I'll stay away from your son, all right! Stay away... FOREVER!
Homer : Oh, no!
Sideshow Bob : Wait a minute. That's no good.
[walks away, then runs back]
Sideshow Bob : Wait, I've got a good one now! Marge, say "stay away from my son" again.
Marge : No!
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Selma : Sideshow Bob tried to kill me on our honeymoon.
Blue-Haired Lawyer : How many people in this court are thinking of killing her right now?
[a few people raise their hands]
Blue-Haired Lawyer : Be honest...
[everyone raises their hand; a man gasps when he notices Patty]
Patty : Ah, she's always leaving the toilet seat up.
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Marge : [looking at Bart's collection of death threats] Hmm, this one's done in different handwriting.
Homer Simpson : Oh, uh, I wrote that one, after Bart somehow put this tattoo on my butt.
[Homer drops his pants, revealing a "wide load" tattoo on his rear end. Everyone laughs]
Nelson : [outside the window] Ha ha!
Bart : But who'd want to hurt me? I'm this century's Dennis The Menace.
Homer Simpson : It's probably the person you least suspect.
Lisa : That's good, Dad.
Grampa : I say we call Matlock. He'll find the culprit! It's probably that evil Gavin MacLeod or George Guberlindsey.
Bart : Grandpa, Matlock's not real.
Grampa : Neither are my teeth, but I can still eat corn on the cob, if someone cuts it off and smushes it into a fine paste. Now that's good eatin'!
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[getting death threat letters has made Bart paranoid on his way to school]
Marge : [menacingly, with large scissors] Bart... I'm going to GET you...
[brightly, clipping coupons]
Marge : ...some ice cream at the store since I'm saving so much money on Diet Cola.
[Bart walks down the street]
Ned Flanders : [menacingly, wearing a Freddy Kruger razor glove] Say your prayers, Simpson...
[brightly]
Ned Flanders : ...because the schools can't force you like they should.
[to Maude]
Ned Flanders : Maude, these new finger razors make hedge trimming as much fun as sitting through church.
[Bart enters class]
Mrs. Krabappel : [menacingly] You're going to be my murder victim, Bart...
[brightly]
Mrs. Krabappel : ...in our school production of Lizzy Borden, starring Martin Prince as Lizzy.
[Martin is wearing a dress and a wig, wielding an axe]
Martin Prince : Forty whacks with a wet noodle, Bart.
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[last lines]
Marge : [as the car pulls up in front of the house] It's so good to be home again.
Grampa Simpson : [who has somehow become a woman complete with long hair and lipstick, rushes towards the car] Look what happened without my pills!
Marge : [gasps] Bart! Run upstairs, get Grampa's medicine!
Jasper Beardly : [appears, dressed in his finest] Not so fast.
[Jasper takes his hat off and takes out a bunch of flowers and hands them to Abe]
Jasper Beardly : I wanna court this fair young maiden.
[the screen fades out in a heart shape and the credits roll]
Grampa Simpson : [to Jasper] There's something you should know about me.
Jasper Beardly : I've got Steve and Edie tickets.
Grampa Simpson : I'm all yours.
[Abe kisses Jasper]