The Simpsons (TV Series)
Cape Feare (1993)
Hank Azaria: Chief Wiggum, Lou, Moe Szyslak, Snake Jailbird, Obengruppenfuhrer Wolfcastle, General Krull, Parole Board Officer, Ernest P. Worrell, FBI Man #2
Quotes
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Bart : Take him away, boys.
Chief Wiggum : Hey, I'm the chief here. Bake him away, toys.
Lou : What'd you say, Chief?
Chief Wiggum : Do what the kid says.
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Lisa : Hey, a letter from my pen-pal, Anya.
Anya : [reading, Anya narrates] Dear Lisa, as I write this, I am very sad. Our President has been overthrown and...
[Voice changes]
General Krull : ...replaced, by the benevolent General Krull. All hail Krull, and his glorious regime! Sincerly, little girl.
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Announcer : Ladies and gentlemen, it's Up Late With McBain! I'm your host, Corporal Obengruppenfuhrer Wolfcastle. And now, here's McBain!
[McBain walks out on stage]
Rainer Wolfcastle : Ja, thank you, ja. Let's hear it for my music guy, Skoey. That's some outfit, Skoey. It makes you look like a homosexual.
[audience boos]
Rainer Wolfcastle : Well, maybe you all are homosexuals, too.
[audience boos]
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Police Chief Wiggum : You're under arrest, Sideshow Bob!
Sideshow Bob : BY LUCIFER'S BEARD!
Police Chief Wiggum : Uh... Yeah. It's a good thing you drifted by this brothel!
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Blue-Haired Lawyer : Robert, if released, would you pose any threat to one Bart Simpson?
Sideshow Bob : Bart Simpson?
[chuckles]
Sideshow Bob : The spirited little scamp who twice foiled my evil schemes and sent me to this dank, urine-soaked hellhole?
Parole Board Officer : Uh, we object to the term "urine-soaked hellhole", when you could have said "pee-pee soaked heckhole."
Sideshow Bob : Cheerfully withdrawn.
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[after writing a death threat to Bart in blood, Bob starts writing another letter with his bleeding finger]
Sideshow Bob : "Dear 'Life in These United States,' a funny thing happened to me...?
[as his finger bleeds freely, he sways, woozy, and collapses onto the desk]
Snake : Use a pen, Sideshow Bob.
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Chief Wiggum : Sideshow Bob has no decency. He called me Chief Piggum!
[everybody in court house laughs]
Chief Wiggum : Oh wait, I get it, he's all right.
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Announcer : [Opening scene, Bart and Lisa are watching TV] Ladies and gentlemen, it's Up Late With McBain. I'm your announcer, Obergruppenfuehrer Wolfcastle. And here's McBain!
Rainer Wolfcastle : Ja. Thank you. Ja. That's nice. Let's say hello to my music guy, Scoey.
[studio audience cheering and applauding]
Rainer Wolfcastle : That is some outfit, Scoey. It makes you look like a homosexual.
Rainer Wolfcastle : [studio audience booing] Oh. Maybe you all are homosexuals too.
Bart : This is horrible. The Fox network has sunk to a new low.
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FBI Man #2 : We have places your family can hide in peace and security. Cape Fear, Terror Lake, New Horrorfield, Screamville.
Homer : Ooh! Ice Cream-Ville!
FBI Man #2 : No, Screamville.
Homer : AAH!
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FBI Man #1 : Don't worry, Mrs. Simpson. We've helped hundreds of people in danger. We'll give you a new name, a new job, new identities.
Homer : Ooh! I wanna be John Elway!
[dissolve to Homer's daydream as a football player wearing old-fashioned leather uniforms while all the others wear modern football uniforms]
Announcer : Elway takes the snap and runs it in for a touchdown! Thanks to Elway's patented last-second magic, the final score of Super Bowl XXX, Denver - 7, San Francisco - 56.
Homer : [back to reality] Woohoo!