Jeffrey Dean Morgan credited as playing...
Edward Blake • Comedian
- Dr. Manhattan: She was pregnant. And you gunned her down.
- Edward Blake: That's right. And you know what, you watched me. You could've turned the gun into steam, the bullets into mercury, the bottle into goddamned snowflakes but you didn't, did you? You really don't give a damn about human beings. You're driftin' out of touch, Doc. God help us all.
- Edward Blake: Once you realize what a joke everything is, being the Comedian is the only thing that makes sense.
- Adrian Veidt: It doesn't take a genius to see that the world has problems.
- Edward Blake: No, but it takes a room full of morons to think they're small enough for you to handle.
- Dan Dreiberg: What happened to us? What happened to the American Dream?
- Edward Blake: "What happened to the American Dream?" It came true! You're lookin' at it...
- Edward Blake: God damn I love working on American soil, Dan. Ain't had this much fun since Woodward and Bernstein.
- Dan Dreiberg: How long can we keep this up?
- Edward Blake: Congress is pushing through some new bill that's gonna outlaw masks. Our days are numbered. Till then it's like you always say, we're society's only protection.
- Dan Dreiberg: From what?
- Edward Blake: You kidding me? From themselves.
- Edward Blake: So now Moloch's back in town and you got your knickers all in a twist... you really think it matters if you catch him?
- Rorschach: Justice matters!
- Edward Blake: Justice? Justice is coming to all of us, no matter what the fuck we do. You know, mankind's been trying to kill each other off since the beginning of time. Now, we finally have the power to finish the job. Ain't nothing gonna matter once those nukes start flying; we'll all be dust. And Ozymandias here will be the smartest man on the cinder.
- Sally Jupiter: [Eddie is aggressively coming on to Sally despite her reluctance] I said "no", Eddie.
- Edward Blake: [smiles] "No" spelled Y-E-S.
- Sally Jupiter: "No" spelled N-O. All right?
- Edward Blake: [speaking to Moloch] The truth is, you're the closest thing to a friend I got. What the fuck does that say?
- Sally Jupiter: [to Eddie after sending Laurie away from him] Are there no depths you won't sink to?
- Edward Blake: Jesus Christ Sally, can't a guy talk to his- an old friend's daughter?
- Edward Blake: [to Dr. Manhattan] You know if we'd lost here in Vietnam, I think it might've driven us crazy. Y'know, as a country. But we didn't. Thanks to you.