Shaun of the Dead (2004)
Kate Ashfield: Liz
Photos
Quotes
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Liz : Shaun?
Shaun : Yeah?
Liz : You see what I'm saying?
Shaun : Yep, totally.
Liz : I know he's your best friend, but you do live with him.
Shaun : I know.
Liz : It's not that I don't like Ed.
[Liz looks over at Ed who is playing an arcade game]
Liz : Ed, it's not that I don't like you.
Ed : It's all right.
Liz : It would just be nice if we could...
Ed : [talking to the arcade machine] Fuck!
Liz : ...spend a bit more time together...
Ed : [talking to the arcade machine] Bollocks!
Liz : ...just the two of us.
Ed : [talking to the arcade machine] Cock it!
Liz : It's just with Ed here, it's no wonder I always bring my flat-mates out and then that only exacerbates things.
Shaun : What do you mean?
Liz : Well you guys hardly get on, do you?
Shaun : No, what does "exacerbate" mean?
Liz : It means um, to make things worse.
Shaun : Right. Well I mean, it's not that I don't like David and Di.
[Shaun looks over at David and Di at the table next to them]
Shaun : Guys, it's not that I don't like you.
David , Dianne : [together] It's all right.
Shaun : And it's not that I don't want to spend time with you cause I do. It's just... Ed doesn't have too many friends.
Ed : Can I get... any of you cunts... a drink?
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Shaun : Well maybe one should do the other, and then do themselves.
Liz : Oh maybe you should do me, I'll only muck it up if I have to do myself.
[Shaun mimes shooting Liz and then himself, to see how it feels]
Shaun : You know, I don't think I've got it in me to shoot my flatmate, my mum, and my girlfriend all in the same night.
Liz : [pauses] What makes you think I'd have taken you back?
Shaun : Well... You don't want to die single do you?
Ed : [interrupting] That's it. I would like to be shot.
Shaun : Besides, I've changed. I haven't had a fag since yesterday, I promise!
Ed : He hasn't!
-
[Shaun hands Liz a bunch of flowers]
Shaun : Got you these.
[Liz reads the label]
Liz : "To a wonderful mum"?
Shaun : [sniggers] Oooh! Yeah, that's, because... I thought, it would be, funny, because of what you said last night about me y'know, don't wanna be my mum and that. It's just a little joke, just sort of spur of the moment...
[long pause]
Liz : They're for your mum, aren't they?
Shaun : Yeah.
Liz : Smooth.
-
[while he is disguised as a zombie, Ed's phone rings and he answers it]
[others look horrified]
Ed : Two seconds!
[he chats on his phone until Shaun knocks it out of his hand]
Ed : Oi! What are you doing?
Shaun : [shouts] What am I doing? What are you doing, you stupid moron?
Ed : Fuck off!
Shaun : [shouts] You fuck off! Fuck fucking off! I've spent... look at me! I've spent my entire life sticking my neck out for you and all you ever do is fuck things up! Fuck things up and make me look stupid! Well, I'm not going to let you do it any more. OK? Not today!
Liz : Shaun!
Shaun : What?
[sees the hundreds of zombies staring at them]
Shaun : Oh.
-
[David is pointing a gun at Barbara and Shaun is trying to stop him]
Liz : PLEASE CAN WE... JUST CALM... THE FUCK... DOWN!
-
Liz , Declan : [as each survivor passes by their parallel counterpart] Hi.
David , Mark : [formally] Hello.
Dianne , Maggie : [friendly] Hi!
Barbara , Yvonne's Mum : [politely] Hello.
Ed , Cousin Tom : [too involved with their cell phones, briefly glancing at each other, muttering] Hello.