John Hannah: Jonathan

The Mummy Returns

Jonathan

Rick: Alex I've got a big job for you. I want you to stay here and protect the car.
Jonathan: I can do that.
Alex: Protect the car? Come on, Dad. Just because I'm a kid doesn't mean I'm stupid.
Rick: I know.
Alex: [ruffles his hair] Dad!
Rick: Ehh...
Jonathan: If you see anyone come running out screaming, it's just me.
Rick: [to Jonathan about Alex] Maybe you should stay here and watch him.
Jonathan: Yes, now you're talking.

Ardeth Bay: I am sorry if I alarmed your son, but you must understand, now that the bracelet is on his wrist, we have only seven days before the Scorpion King awakens.
Rick: We? What we?
Ardeth Bay: If he is not killed, he will raise the Army of Anubis.
Jonathan: I take it that's not a good thing?
Rick: Oh, he'll wipe out the world.
Jonathan: Ah, the old "wipe out the world" ploy.

[after their narrow escape, Izzy cheers wildly, then rounds on O'Connell, furious]
Izzy: O'Connell. You almost got me killed!
Rick: [shrugs weakly] At least you didn't get shot.
Evelyn: Izzy! Thank you!
[kisses Izzy on the cheek]
Evelyn: Thank you!
[kisses Izzy on the cheek again]
Jonathan: [with his diamond] Yes! Yes! Yes!
Izzy: [considerably more mellow] O'Connell, who the hell you been messin' with this time, huh?
Rick: Oh, you know, the usual. Mummies, pygmies, big bugs.

[Jonathan trying to start the car as he hears gunfire break out]
Alex: Hurry up!
Jonathan: Come on, come on, come on!
[Johnathan turns the key and breaks it off]
Alex: You broke it, you broke it, you broke it!
Jonathan: Be quiet Alex! If there's going to be any hysterics, they'll come from me!

[while Jonathan is fighting Anch Su Namun]
Alex: Efday Shokran... Efday Shokran... Uncle Jon, I don't know what this last symbol is!
Jonathan: What's it look like?
Alex: It's a bird! A stork!
Jonathan: [ecstatic] I know that one! I know that one!
Alex: Then what is it?
Jonathan: [struggling with Anch Su Namun] Ah... Ah...!
[throws her off]
Jonathan: [triumphantly] Ahmenophus!

Rick: Okay, you're here, the bad guys are here, Evy's been kidnapped. Let me guess.
Ardeth Bay: Yes, they once again removed the creature from his grave.
Jonathan: I don't mean to point fingers, but isn't it your job to make sure that *doesn't* happen?
Ardeth Bay: That woman who was with him, she knows things; things that no living person could possibly know. She knew exactly where the creature was buried. We were hoping she would lead us to the bracelet. She obviously did. And now they have it.
Alex: [revealing the bracelet on his wrist] I wouldn't get too nervous just yet.

[Jonathan and Shafek are being chased by pygmies and are running into the burial ground]
Jonathan: Look! There's a burial ground! We're safe! We're safe! See those sacred stones? They'll never cross those.
Shafek: You are sure?
Jonathan: Yes, of course I'm sure!
[a pygmy runs past and stabs Shafek. Jonathan screams]
Jonathan: Sorry. My mistake.

Jonathan: I say, chaps, look at this. Shrunken heads. I'd *love* to know how they do that.
[Everybody looks strangely at Jonathan]
Jonathan: Just curious.

[last lines]
Izzy: Uh, that's half mine, you know.
Jonathan: What?
Izzy: [indicating the diamond] That's half mine.
Jonathan: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Izzy: What? You took my gold stick! I know you took my gold stick!
Jonathan: No, I have no id... I swear on the head of my wife, I have no idea what you're talking about.
Izzy: You haven't... you a... you ain't got a wife!
Jonathan: I don't got your gold stick either!
[they keep arguing and their voices fade as the ship sails off into the sunset]

[trying to console Alex about his moms death]
Jonathan: Try to think of it like this, Alex. She's gone to a better place. You know, like it says in the Good Book.
Alex: The book.
Jonathan: What?
Alex: That's it. That's it!
Jonathan: That's what?
Alex: Come on, Uncle Jon! Come on, come on!
Jonathan: What?
Alex: That's it! The book!

[as Jonathan picks up his rifle]
Ardeth Bay: You any good with that?
Jonathan: Three times Fox and Hound's grand champion, I'll have you know.
[nods at Ardeth's scimitar]
Jonathan: You any good with that?
Ardeth Bay: You'll know soon enough.
[in a flash, the scimitar is in his hand and the blade rests against Jonathan's neck]
Ardeth Bay: Because the only way to kill an Anubis warrior is by taking off its head.
Jonathan: [swallows] I'll remember that.

[Jonathan, mistaken for Rick is in a chair with a knife at his throat while being asked about the Bracelet of Anubis]
Meela: Where's your wife?
Jonathan: My wife? Oh you mean Evy. Well, I think she went off to Baden-Baden or Tibet or something. The girl is a free spirit. Did I mention I was single now?
Meela: [pulls a snake out of a basket] Egyptian Aps are quite poisonous.
Jonathan: It's downstairs. There's a safe. the combination is, uh, uh, 320-58, er, 393-something. It's the safe downstairs. I told you. I told you!
Meela: And your point is?
Jonathan: My point is, I told you so you wouldn't kill me.
Meela: When did we make that arrangement?
[leans towards him and points the snake at his throat]
Meela: [Rick enters and sees Jonathan tied up and Meela and her men surrounding him]
Rick: Uh, hello. Uh, Jonathan, I thought I said no more wild parties.
Jonathan: Well, when you're popular...

Evelyn: [stopping Meela from killing Jonathan] Why don't you pick on somebody your own size?
Jonathan: Oh, my God. Evy!
Evelyn: Take Alex. Go and help Rick.
Alex: But, Mom...
Evelyn: No buts, Alex.
Jonathan: [leading him out] Come on, Alex.
Alex: But.. but...
Evelyn: [drawing a pair of sais from a statute] I'll be just fine.