Jurassic Women

Another reviewer referred to David Heavener, the 'writer' of this mess as legendary. Would that be as in he legendary for the crap he's foisted on an unsuspecting public? Because that's what this waste of time is - crap. Bad, no STUPID story, no budget, lame dialogue, terrible acting - and why do the women look like they just came out of a salon? Avoid at all costs.

Two astronauts on a space mission find themselves a wormhole and are dragged to it to another planet where the sexes are at war with each other. The men are these troglodyte types and they have good martial arts skills. They capture our two travelers, but then the two are rescued by the women who are warriors and hunters, but also wonder of wonders speak a fluent English.

God knows how this evolved but though we learn these people have some long lives and stay looking young they do die eventually. And this situation is certainly not going to increase the population. Some breeders are definitely needed and at least one of the astronauts is willing to do his share.

The only actor you will know in this monstrosity called Jurassic Women is Jan-Michael Vincent who plays some kind of forest guru and look ridiculous doing it. In keeping with a tradition established by all those B westerns back in the day, the title has nothing to do with the film. There's not a dinosaur in sight.

Lots of scantily clad female flesh is all this one has going for it.

Two astronauts (David and Cody) crash land on a planet with cave people inhabiting it. The males are primitive and violent. The females are intelligent and have trained themselves in martial arts. A mysterious woman appeared a long time ago "before David and Cody's time" and gave the women a book of knowledge. The mysterious woman's fate isn't discussed. The astronauts want to sleep with the women. First, David decides to help them save one of the girls that's kidnaped by the men. Cody has nefarious intentions. The women want to teach the men how to be civil. A war between cavemen and cavewomen will erupt with two astronauts in the middle.