Photos
Quotes
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[Noticing Dr. Evil's spaceship on radar]
Radar Operator : Colonel, you better have a look at this radar.
Colonel : What is it, son?
Radar Operator : I don't know, sir, but it looks like a giant...
Jet Pilot : Dick. Dick, take a look out of starboard.
Co-Pilot : Oh my God, it looks like a huge...
Bird-Watching Woman : Pecker.
Bird-Watching Man : [raising binoculars] Ooh, Where?
Bird-Watching Woman : Over there. What sort of bird is that? Wait, it's not a woodpecker, it looks like someone's...
Army Sergeant : Privates. We have reports of an unidentified flying object. It has a long, smooth shaft, complete with...
Baseball Umpire : Two balls.
[looking up from game]
Baseball Umpire : What is that. It looks just like an enormous...
Chinese Teacher : Wang. pay attention.
Wang : I was distracted by that giant flying...
Musician : Willie.
Willie : Yeah?
Musician : What's that?
Willie : [squints] Well, that looks like a huge...
Colonel : Johnson.
Radar Operator : Yes, sir?
Colonel : Get on the horn to British Intelligence and let them know about this.
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Basil : Did we get Dr. Evil?
Radar Operator : No, sir, he got away in that big spaceship that looks like a huge...
Teacher : Penis. The male reproductive organ. Also known as tallywhacker, schlong, or...
Friendly Dad : Wiener? Any of your kids want another wiener?
Friendly Son : Dad, what's that?
Friendly Dad : I don't know, son, but it has great big...
Peanut Vendor : Nuts. Hot, salty nuts. Who wants some?...
Peanut Vendor : Lord Almighty!
Woman : That looks just like my husband's...
Circus Barker : ONE-EYED MONSTER. Step right up and see the One-eyed Monster!
Cyclops : RARRR.
Cyclops : Hey, what's that? It looks like a...
Fan : Woody. Woody Harrelson. Could I have your autograph?
Woody : Sure. Oh, my Lord! Look at that thing!
Fan : It's so huge.
Woody : No, I've seen bigger. That's...
Dr. Evil : Just a little prick.