Mousehunt (1997)

Eric Christmas: Ernie and Lars' Lawyer

Quotes 

• Ernie and Lars' Lawyer : [reading Rudolph Smuntz's will]  "I leave you not just a model factory, but something infinitely more valuable: The future of string... itself."

  [a loud explosion; Ernie parts the blinds of the office window to see string raining down on the factory workers] 

  Ernie and Lars' Lawyer : "And thus, it is my dying wish... that my two sons run Smuntz String together."

  Ernie Smuntz : [claps]  Great. Let's stick a "for sale" sign on the front lawn and see what we can get.

  Lars Smuntz : Ernie, we're not supposed to sell it. We're supposed to run it, together!

  Ernie Smuntz : Either way, this godforsaken museum piece isn't worth a dime, now, is it, Lars?

  Lars Smuntz : *Some* things are more important than money, *Ernie*.

  Ernie Smuntz : Notice that it's always the financially challenged who say that?

  [Lars stands up] 

  Ernie and Lars' Lawyer : [holds out his open palm]  Please, please. "I also bequeath to you my personal effects, including... my ceramic egg... half box of Cuban cigars... and--" Oh, yes, yes. "My-my collection of spoons."

  [empties the contents from a box one at a time and sets them down on the table] 

  Ernie Smuntz : [sarcastically]  My goodness, what a treasure, what a legacy.

  [grabs the spoons] 

  Ernie Smuntz : *Spoons*! Spoons! So many spoons, so little time!

• Ernie and Lars' Lawyer : [about their new house]  It's interesting. it seems the previous owner was found locked in a trunk in the attic...