Bill Hunter credited as playing...
- Bernadette: Stop flexing your muscles, you big pile of budgie turd. I'm sure your mates will be much more impressed if you just go back to the pub and fuck a couple of pigs on the bar.
- Bob: Bernadette, please.
- Frank: *Bernadette?* Well I'll be darned. The whole circus is in town. Well I suppose you wanna fuck too do you? Come on Bernadette, come and fuck me. That's it. Come on. Come and fuck me. Come on. Fuck me.
- [Bernadette knees Frank in the groin]
- Bernadette: There, now you're fucked!
- Bernadette: What a nice dog. What's it's name?
- Bob: Herpes. If she's good, she'll heal.
- Bob: If you don't mind me asking, what kind of cabaret act do you do?
- Felicia: We dress up in women's clothes and parade around mouthing the words to other people's songs.
- Cynthia: Refreshments! Lemonade here - I make!
- Bob: That's very nice, darling. Please... go back inside.
- Cynthia: Lemonade here - I make! Lemonade for guests.
- Bob: No, darling, please.
- Cynthia: [snarls viciously and curses in an Asian language] I make chockrit cracker!
- Cynthia: Me perform for you. Me sing!
- Bob: No, Cynthia, you no perform. They perform, not you.
- [Cynthia shouts viciously in an Asian language]
- Bob: [waking up from a drunken state of unconsciousness] Hello.
- Cynthia: Hello!
- Bob: Who are you?
- Cynthia: I your wife!
- Bob: Guess I'll be going home then.
- Cynthia: No! You no going! I coming to. I your wife! See?
- [shows him a marriage certificate]
- Cynthia: I your wife!
- Cynthia: Me perform for you. Me dance too.
- Bob: My wife used to be in the, uh... entertainment business.
- Cynthia: Yeah. You perform here?
- Bob: [to Tick, Bernadette, Felicia and Cynthia] Well! A real life "Les Girls" show. Right, this calls for a celebration.
- Bob: [to Bernadette] Well, I can't go back to Coober Pedy for a while. I'm not the most popular bloke in the world back there anymore.
- Bob: [knocks] Can I come in?
- Bernadette: Now, there's a gentleman. Of course you can, Bob.
- Felicia: [after Tick passes out] Come on, snap out of it. You'll be fine. Come on, love.
- Tick: [coming to] Oh...
- Bob: That's it, mate. You scared us all for a minute.
- Felicia: Just had to have that extra bit of attention, didn't you? Nice one, lovey. Nice one.
