Sandy Helberg credited as playing...
Dr. Schlotkin
- King Roland: Helmet, you fiend! What's going on? What are you doing to my daughter?
- Dark Helmet: Permit me to introduce the brilliant young plastic surgeon, Dr. Phillip Schlotkin. The greatest nose job man in the entire universe and Beverly Hills.
- Dr. Schlotkin: [bowing] Your Highness.
- King Roland: Nose job? I don't understand. She's already had a nose job. It was her was her sweet-16 present.
- Dark Helmet: No, it's not what you think. It's much, much worse. If you do not give me the combination to the air shield, Dr. Schlotkin will give your daughter back...
- [holding up a blown-up picture]
- Dark Helmet: ...her old nose!
- Princess Vespa: NOOOO! Where did you get that?
- King Roland: All right, I'll tell! I'll tell!
- Princess Vespa: No, Daddy, no, you mustn't!
- King Roland: You're right, my dear. I'll miss your new nose. But I will not tell him the combination, no matter what.
- Dark Helmet: Very well. Dr. Schlotkin, do your worst.
- Dr. Schlotkin: [scraping his blades together] My pleasure.
- Dark Helmet: [Dr. Schlotkin is caught making out with his nurse assistant] Schlotkin!
- Dr. Schlotkin: [pulls away from the nurse and adjusts his glasses as the nurse nervously zips the top of her dress back up] What?
- Dark Helmet: We're done with you. Go back to the golf course and work on your putz.