Jason Patric credited as playing...
Michael
- David: How are those maggots?
- Michael Emerson: Huh?
- David: Maggots, Michael. You're eating maggots. How do they taste?
- Grandpa: [the boys come in carrying Laddie and Star, who are sleeping. Grandpa is totally ignoring the unconscious Laddie in Edgar's arms, and Star in Michael's] Do you know the rule about filling up the car with gas when you take it without asking?
- Michael Emerson: [Hoping he says nothing about Laddie and Star] No, Grandpa.
- Grandpa: Well, now you do.
- Grandpa: Hey, anything around here that might pass for aftershave?
- Sam Emerson: How about some Windex, Grandpa?
- Grandpa: Yeah, yeah, let me try some of that.
- Michael Emerson: You have a big date tonight, Grandpa?
- Grandpa: I'm going to drop my handiwork by the widow Johnson.
- Michael Emerson: What'd ya stuff for her? Mr. Johnson?
- Sam Emerson: You're a vampire! I knew it!
- Michael Emerson: I am not!
- Sam Emerson: So what are you? The Flying Nun?
- [about Grandpa]
- Michael Emerson: Looks like he's dead!
- Sam Emerson: If he's dead, can we go back to Phoenix?
- Michael Emerson: I can't beat your bike.
- David: You don't have to beat me, Michael. You just have to try and keep up.
- Sam Emerson: So where're we going?
- Michael Emerson: Nowhere.
- Sam Emerson: So what's the rush? You're chasing that girl aren't you? Come on, admit it. I'm at the mercy of your sex glands, bud.
- Michael Emerson: Look, this isn't a comic book, Sam, these guys are brutal killers.
- Sam Emerson: So are the Frog brothers!
- Michael Emerson: [Sam comes out of the bathroom, Michael's hand is cut up, and bloody] Nanook.
- Sam Emerson: What about Nanook? What'd you do to my dog, you asshole?
- Michael Emerson: [the Frog Brothers are talking about killing Star] Don't you touch her!
- Edgar Frog: [to Alan] Come on. Vampires have such a rotten temper.
- Michael Emerson: What's happening to me, Star?
- Star: Oh, Michael. Michael, I can't tell you. I don't know how to help you.
- Michael Emerson: What's happening?
- Star: [whispers] I can't.
- Max: [Michael is about to walk out the front door and suddenly sees Max as he's just getting ready to knock] Hey. How you doing? You must be Michael, right?
- Michael Emerson: And you must be Max.
- Max: Right. How are you?
- [they shake hands]
- Max: Well, you're the man of the house and I'm not coming in until you invite me.
- Michael Emerson: You're invited.
- Max: [nods, smiles] Thanks very much.
- [enters]