Duncan Wilmore credited as playing...
Major Lem
- McKittrick: General, the machine has locked us out. It's sending random numbers to the silos.
- Pat Healy: Codes. To launch the missiles.
- General Beringer: Just unplug the goddamn thing! Jesus Christ!
- McKittrick: That won't work, General. It would interpret a shutdown as the destruction of NORAD. The computers in the silos would carry out their last instructions. They'd launch.
- General Beringer: Can't we disarm the missiles?
- Pat Healy: Over a thousand of them? There's no time. At this rate it will hit the launch codes in... 5.3 minutes.
- General Beringer: [smiles sarcastically at McKittrick] Mr. McKittrick, after very careful consideration, sir, I've come to the conclusion that your new defense system sucks.
- McKittrick: I don't have to take that, you pig-eyed sack of shit.
- General Beringer: Oh, I was hoping for something a little better than that from you, sir. A man of your education.
- Major Lem: [holding a telephone] General, it's the president.
- McKittrick: What are you... what are you going to tell him?
- General Beringer: I'm ordering our bombers back to fail-safe. We might have to go through this thing after all.
- Major Lem: [D.S.P. registers a massive launch from Soviet ICBM fields] We have a launch detection. We have a Soviet launch detection.
- Colonel Joe Conley: BMEWS confirms a massive attack.
- Major Lem: Missile Warning - no malfunction.
- Radar Analyst Kirkland: Confidence is high. I repeat, confidence is high.
- Airman Fields: Cobra Dane, is this an exercise?
- Colonel Joe Conley: Negative, this is not an exercise.
- Airman Fields: [to Beringer] General, D.S.P. is tracking three hundred inbound Soviet ICBMs.
- General Beringer: [points at the C.C.P.D.S. screen] Tell me this is another one of your simulations, Mr. McKittrick.
- McKittrick: It's not, Jack.
- General Beringer: Alright. Flush the bombers, get the subs in launch mode. We are at DEFCON 1.
- Major Lem: [buzzer sounds] DEFCON 1.