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Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972)

Quotes

Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things

Edit
  • Terry: Gee, Mr. Wizard, how do you get the litmus paper to turn blue?
  • Alan: The same way I get the egg into the Coke bottle, bitch.
  • Val: Will you quit giving us a play-by-play of your flabby bladder?
  • Alan: Say, um, Paul, I was thinking - since, um, Terry is a new member of the company, sort of coming into her theatrical puberty, so to speak, I just might have to invoke the rule of primal juncture.
  • Paul: Primal juncture, what's that?
  • Terry: It means he gets to make it with me first. Sort of like the slave master breaking in all the new virgins, right?
  • Alan: Crudely put, but basically accurate. Well, Paul?
  • Paul: Well, you'll have to ask the virgin.
  • Terry: You're about 10 years too late. I lost it when I was a Brownie, to an Eagle Scout.
  • Alan: Oh, really?
  • Terry: Scout's honor!
  • Alan: Uh, how many merits does an Eagle Scout get for seducing a Brownie?
  • Terry: I don't know, you'll have to check that in your Boy Scout Manual, under "Things to Do in the Woods".
  • Alan: Clever girl.
  • Jeff: I peed in my pants!
  • Val: Get out of the grave, Alan. Get out of the grave and let an artist show you how to call a curse down on Satan!
  • Alan: Man is a machine that manufactures manure.
  • Paul: You mean this whole thing was a gag?
  • Alan: No, these are a couple of real ghouls! They've just had a change of heart!
  • Emerson: Yeah, we're trying to go straight!
  • Alan: [to Orville's corpse] I'm gonna take your scraps and feed them to my dog.
  • Alan: Perfect. Absolutely perfect.
  • Alan: Silence! The magnitude of your simplitude overwhelms me!
  • Val: The 10-cent tour, which we get for only a quarter.

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Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972)
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