There's a Girl in My Soup (1970)

Goldie Hawn: Marion

Photos 

Quotes 

• Marion : What are you, a mortician or something? This is the kind of music they play in funeral parlors.

• Marion : Are you trying to get me tight?

  Robert Danvers : You're frightening enough sober.

• Robert Danvers : What would you like to drink?

  Marion : What have you got?

  Robert Danvers : Well, there's Sherry, Brandy, Whiskey, Scotch and Rye, Kirs, Dubonnet, Campari, Slivovitz, Port, Vodka, Ouzo, Saki. Or, we could even be devils and split a bottle of the old champagne wine.

  Marion : Got any beer?

  Robert Danvers : There's some rubbing alcohol in the medicine cabinet, if you care for that.

  Marion : Scotch.

• Marion : [from Robert's bathroom]  Hey, what are you, a weirdo or something?

  Robert Danvers : Why do you ask?

  Marion : All these mirrors.

  Robert Danvers : It amuses me.

  Marion : What's so amusing about staring at yourself on the throne?

• Robert Danvers : If I made a pass at you now, what would your reaction be?

  Marion : Oh, well, you want the results. before you place the bet! What do you reckon the odds are?

• Marion : You didn't bring me here to look at me.

  Robert Danvers : I was under the impression that you brought me.

  Marion : Oh, wow. Next, you'll be shouting rape.

  Robert Danvers : Oh, if you like, yes.

• Robert Danvers : Look, may I ask you a question without getting a question in reply?

  Marion : It depends.

• Marion : There's always a bit of yak about sex before the pass to get you in the mood.

  Robert Danvers : To get who in the mood?

  Marion : The girl. You're already in it.

• Marion : Most of the fellas I know would have made a grab as soon as we walked through the door. They're too lazy to chat you up. They all walk around in their tight jeans, so you can take a good look at the goods and make up your own mind. But, you, you don't put the goods in the store window. You bring me home and prove to me that you're loaded and drop some big hints about who you are and I'm supposed to be all impressed and run back to my girlfriends and say, "Hey guys, guess who did me the big favor last night?"

• Robert Danvers : Why do you always answer a question with another question?

  Marion : Why do you?

• Robert Danvers : Why did you say just now that you wanted to keep one up on me a bit longer?

  Marion : Supply and demand, I suppose. I'm in demand and until I supply, I'm one up.

  Robert Danvers : And a bit longer?

  Marion : Well, the final result is never much in doubt, is it?

• Marion : They're all passing me around like a tray of cakes. Just have a nibble and pass her on. You know, it isn't very nice - being passed around.

• Jimmy : Will you listen to me? Oh, Christ, my head.

  Marion : I hope your head breaks open and all your brains spill out all over the place and you tread on them and fall over.

  [slams the door] 

  Robert Danvers : Gruesome turn of phrase, hasn't she?

• Robert Danvers : One last word of advice, young lady. You're 19 and what is commonly called a push-over. Now then, had it been anyone else but me last night...

  Marion : I know.

  Robert Danvers : If you continue like this, by the time you're 21, you're going to - well, you're too lovely to go throwing yourself at any man to - let them take advantage of you.

  [Marion giggles] 

  Robert Danvers : What's so funny?

  Marion : Just the words you use: "take advantage".

• Robert Danvers : My God, but you are lovely.

  Marion : Oh, my God, but you're corny.

• Marion : That's me. The disposable girl. Use me once and then throw me away.

• Robert Danvers : [at a French wine tasting]  You don't swallow it. You spit it out.

  Marion : Why waste it?

  Robert Danvers : Then you can judge the next.

  Marion : Who wants my opinion?

• Reporter #2 : Where did you both meet?

  Robert Danvers : At breakfast.

  Reporter #3 : Where?

  Marion : At a Turkish bath.

• Marion : You're - um - very nice. Handsome. Aren't you going to - um - take advantage of me, now that I want you to? I should. Don't worry. I promise I won't laugh.

• Robert Danvers : Now what? How very romantic you are. I ought to bloody well put you across my knee.

  Marion : Okay, come on! Come on.

• Reporter #1 : What's your maiden name, Mrs. Danvers?

  Marion : Ada Sludge.

• Andrew : Good morning!

  Marion : Well, can I help you?

  Andrew : Is himself in?

  Marion : He's in the shower.

• Marion : Do you still want to share us both?

  Jimmy : Oh, changed your mind have you?

  Caroline : Now, just a minute.

  Jimmy : Shut up. Nobody's asking you.