Vaughn Taylor credited as playing...
Thaddeus Whipple
- Thaddeus Whipple: Young lady, I don't know why you're up here fussing about our stock. We Whipples control it anyway. We haven't made a widget since 1854. Any fool knows that. Flying clippers went out years ago.
- Molly Thatcher: But you must make something?
- Thaddeus Whipple: Why?
- Henry Tyroon: Well, it seems to me, if you don't make something, you've got no call to stay in business.
- Thaddeus Whipple: I'm a busy man, and I'd like this to be the last word on the subject. Our company owns just two things: that bog out there and some stock we bought. Only thing that keeps us from dissolving the corporation is my brother Lemuel says we'd have to pay a tax on the stock.
- Molly Thatcher: I don't understand.
- Henry Tyroon: Well, what Mr. Whipple is saying is that when they went out of widget production, they took whatever was left in the treasury and invested it in another stock. And that's where it is now.
- Thaddeus Whipple: That's right. We bought American Telephone and Telegraph just before the war.
- Henry Tyroon: Back in the '30s?
- Thaddeus Whipple: The day before they sank the "Lusitania".
- Henry Tyroon: [incredulous] You bought AT&T in 1915?
- Molly Thatcher: You have a fortune in hidden assets!
- Thaddeus Whipple: Young lady, don't you fuss with our stock. It's selling now just about the way it ought to. Uh, you'd better go on home and get yourself a husband... and a cookbook.