Pinocchio (I) (2022)
3/10
Soulless
10 September 2022
Warning: Spoilers
A 3.5 rating... The one thing that I sat through the entirety of this film was to see the whale again. Monstro was the gigantic man-eating sperm whale, and the fourth and final antagonist of Disney's 1940 animated feature Pinocchio. I remember it very well. That beast was shelved in favor of a thing bearing tentacles. I groaned aloud, but kept my eyes focused for the final outcome; Pinocchio becoming a real boy was the famous ending of many generations of children. Robert Zemeckis denied us even that. The story stops as the characters walk away from the beach. I fear this was purposeful for sake of a sequel, but I can't imagine even Disney overlooking the audience's reaction. This was not joyful or entertaining. Even Tom Hanks seemed dead-eyed in his role, almost robotic in nature. There was no charm there.

I will admit that Disney got all the elements right: The puppet does resemble the old animated Pinocchio, the voices were very close to the original voice actors, and the songs were sang beautifully. But this was a soulless creation. It's a mimicry of an classic movie that was made for everyone. This Pinocchio was built to make money. This is folly of great wealth, it can buy you a near perfect replica, but it can not have the magic or heart of the original. Disney is but a corporation today. It's wonderful beginnings, that spoke to children across the world, are long behind it. The Walt Disney design to create something a child could love is unbearably empty. I am finished with Disney. It will never be what it was before. It's monetary value probably speaks volumes on the world market, but in my heart it is but a faded memory. A memory replaced with product formulas.
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