5/10
Dull and Dramatically Inert
2 February 2022
Warning: Spoilers
I'm not a fan of the 1940s film noir version of "Nightmare Alley" starring Tyrone Power, so I was all in for a new crack at the material, even if there is a "huh?...why now?" element to the timing. But Guillermo Del Toro doesn't have much more luck with the material than the original and has made a bloated, artificial, and curiously inert movie out of it.

The film looks gorgeous, let's get that out of the way. But it almost looks too gorgeous, like a a glossy magazine spread. The settings feel too stylized and artificial, as do all of the performances. Bradley Cooper isn't that great of an actor in my opinion, and he's not able to make a fairly one-note character very compelling. Rooney Mara is wasted window dressing. Cate Blanchett is the only person who got the memo that this is film noir material, and she plays her character to the hilt as a classic femme fatale. The problem is she's the only one who does, so her performance, while it's the most entertaining, feels cartoonish and like it should be in another movie. The film is also way too long for the slim plot. This is something that could have made a tight, tense, little 90-minute thriller but feels like something stretched by a director who doesn't know when to quit.

And what is with Del Toro's obsession with throwing in such graphically violent scenes at the end of a movie that up to that point hasn't been graphic at all? Is it to shock us with the contrast? Because it pulls me out of the world of the movie. He has a fetish with showing people's faces literally caved in in gory detail, something he indulged in "Pan's Labyrinth" and again here.

This movie is a misfire.

Grade: C+
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