1/10
Ugh...this film is mind numbingly bad.
29 December 2010
Warning: Spoilers
Ugh. That's the only reaction that can be had to nearly every scene of this putrid, idiotic family film. Ugh!!! Sure, this thing is meant for kids, but there are a lot of films out there made to appeal to children, but also are intelligent enough to entertain the adults. This movie was not going for that. Children, mainly little girls, will eat up this unoriginal material, and laugh at the horribly acted slapstick, and enjoy Hillary Duff's nice character. But adults, the poor adults who happened to go to see this with their children, meanwhile will be cringing in their seats, wondering what life would be like if they didn't have kids, and contemplating suicide right then and there. This is just awful, sappy kiddie fluff, with no redeeming qualities.

So basically, as the title would suggest, this is just a modern day, non-fantasy retelling of the classic Cinderella story. Hillary Duff plays Sam, a teenage girl who used to be happy when her father was alive, before he perished in an earthquake. Unfortunately, her father didn't have a will, and all of his belongings went to Sam's step-mother, and Sam was moved in the attic to make room for the step-mother and her two idiot step-sisters. Sam works at her father's old diner (now owned by her step-mother) and is a huge nerd at school. So, the most popular guy in school, Austin (Chad Michael Murray), and Sam are internet chat buddies, but neither of them no who their texting buddies are. They meet at a school dance, where Hillary Duff is disguised in her eye mask that certainly makes her unrecognizable. She has to leave at midnight to work, and Austin looks for his true love, while Sam tries to build up the courage to tell him. Predictability ensues.

So, what good things can be said of this film? Hmmm, well, Hilary Duff isn't a great actress, but she does fine in this role, and so does Chad Michael Murray. And really, Jennifer Coolidge is fine as the wicked step-mother too. The movie was competently filmed and looked fine on an aesthetic level. So what's so bad about the movie? Everything else.

The step-sister's were complete idiots, and their performances were so over the top it's actually hard to watch. Any jokes that are made by them is ridiculous and unfunny. Dan Byrd, who plays Carter, Sam's best friend, gives an alright performance, but when we are first introduced to him, he is like a wannabe rapper. Why? He's not like this for any more of the film, so was this character trait considered just too stupid and/or stereotypical to continue with, so they dropped it? Who knows, but it's odd and takes away continuity from the character. To add to stupid character traits, despite that this movie often tries to be a comedy, not one funny thing happens in this entire 90 minute film. Not one laugh, not one smile, not one smirk.

This movie also raises many questions. How does Chad Michael Murray not recognize Hillary Duff in her costume? Why does her try to find who she is by holding an audition, instead of first asking her? Why does it start raining on a cloudless night when Hillary Duff and Mr. Murray start kissing? Why is the only clique at school the popular kids (consisting of 6 people) and the nerds (consisting of Sam, Carter and this weirdo Matrix obsessed fellow)? The answer to all these questions...this movie runs on clichés and is like a quilt stitched together from all the worst qualities of teen and kid movies that preceded it. This thing even has one of those horrible 80's clichéd montages where the character tries on clothing, and the other characters shake their head in disapproval, until they find just the right thing. It's just so bad!!!

Little girls might enjoy this one, but everyone else will hate it. It's awful, even for a kid movie, and should not be viewed by anyone over 7. It's not cute, it's just really, really dumb.

My rating: BOMB out of ****. 95 mins. PG for crude humor and mild language.
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