- SpouseZoë(1998 - ?) (divorced, 2 children)
- Give me now your goatee beard. Hand it over, give it here. Let me hold it in my hand. Chinny, goatee, beardy man. Or do you have a bearded plan? Will you travel round the World, with your furry friend unfurled? Oh barefaced cheek, but covered chin, hand it over, hand it in, hand it over, hand it in, render unto me the hair from your chinny, chin, chin!
- Far better to be outed, than to be inned.
- Where's my guru? What's my mantra? Where's my Neurosis and where's my Psychosis and where is my strange and dysfunctional child?
- [Long: I regret to inform you, Sir, that there are two Elderly Ladies beneath the Monkey Puzzle.] Lock the Doors, Long, lock them now!
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