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The Royal Treatment (2022)
my cheesy smile...
Is so filled with royal plaque,molars dried out like a clipfish because the sweetness and sugarromance of this benign love story is so heavily loaded with generic romcom recipience, so my jawbones or mandibullaes becomes so soft in close connection with an oldermans osteoporosis, and believe it or not, the dorkdriven grumpy old man managed to swallow the whole charade in one piece of view. So demented or not i do dare say that a small recommend wont hurt anyone.
Its moral is pure, the acting is vivid and very pheromonalistic aka just on average, the plotspeed can easily be boosted with the ffwd button( recommended) and the production explodes in colours of royal extravagance, and gives you the best of advice on how to call of your royal wedding. Let yourself loose in the festive mood and music because there are very few bad vibes,its the safeway of easyviewing en core and if youre a male like me, use this one to try to cheer up your better half, you might get a solid kiss in the end.
Should you be a ''manthemanofmen'' you might as well skip it cause its like chewing ''juicy fruit'' from wrigleys on a turnabout british country road( nausea/retching etc).
2:Hrs (2018)
pretty good...
Low cost family entertaining teeny weeny comedy, also severely animal friendly so let fuss and pipp have a look too. Love british actors when with good pronounciation and 'earable diction, funny story in a way of moviemaking thats dying out, namely the crank and prank comedy. Grumpy old man recommends.
Cyrano (2021)
you neednt know...
So much about the caracter cyrano, because its only strings of the historical book present, but cyrano as a musical escapade where quite glittering, and the prize goes to the bounced in the bar of the past peter dinkley, whos voice talent overstratified all my expectations, and a film where the symbiosis of song and music is just brilliant. I usually hate the classic stories, and avoids musicals as a pestillence, but the music coming outta nowhere far before the start of singing is the key to success, and apart from some low recording sound of vocals its just a bliss of goosebumps...
and thats the reason that you should see this movie thinks the grumpy old man, cause there aint much flaws elsewise. Big or small, dinkley stands tall...
Munich: The Edge of War (2021)
what i find most...
Amusing, or actually what makes me scared is the resemblance of current warmongering in eastern europe, the in situ wars of words between putins russia vs. Lilliputstate ukraine, and we all know what happened in the past( if you dont then lecture yourself at the public library, online stuff could be heavily conspirized by the author or blogger or whatever), therefore do have this historic piece in mind whether youll watch it or not.
Its halfictional, extremely slow at moments, but the timestamp does workout pretty good.v ery well staged sets and locations and the historical anecdotes makes the grumpy old man nod's head. The filmographical quality couldve taken more daring moves, the acting clutches the average line and no more than that.
So its a movie made over a subject that barely cant be opposed by any living human of today, only the history books will live to tell the tale. As a history lesson its entertainment, but dont forget the bloody seriousness due to mistakes made in the past, war mongering is unhealthy and could be lethal to us all is the message from the grumpy old man.
The Hunting (2021)
joelle westwood...
Might blind you and therefore fool you to believe that this is better than nothing, and she does save the glory of an ever so daft and slow thriller flick, that only the boldest narcississt would call a horror movie.
Its not an a, nor a b, definately a c-movie, its low budget, small cast, wannabe warewolf horror feature where everything is shroudded in indian tribe mystique, where the culprit is there all the time, just to outwrench you in the end with a mitochondrial fluxed twist . I didnt see it even though i saw it, cause blood is thicker than blood, isnt it?
Well there are some murders, not the blooody gore you may expect, the monster costume pretty nice, but special effects are nearly completely absent and where they are present ,they are so primitive and of the homemade stuff. Loads of empty dialouges and trytobe-acting makes a game of hangman in the classroom become a better pillia erector thriller than this. When watching i got wibes of the past, just imagine how they made horror movies in the early 1920's silent movies era
the grumpy old man gives a weak 3, you can let this one slip away easily, try a wolverine next time!!!
The Dissident (2020)
a beautiful documentary...
About the small black lambs living out their arabian spring, facing their tyrant leaders with the spoken word, putting their lifes in danger every day, hour, minute and second to reform the arab world into more safe and sound democracies, based on a western standard. The story about jamal is heartbreaking if not to say decapitating, the saudi govners have won this round, and will win several more, only the endtime will show.
So therefore i will acclaim the people that dares to make documentaries like this, the people that dares to take part in them. And lets hope there be made more in the years to come.there are loads of stories left out there to be told, the number of sacrificial lambs have reached many millions since 2011, and even more do and will suffer in the years to come.. so my word to you reading this review, dictated by a grumpy old man, support, speak loud and dont run away. A big recommend, an extreme dissidentic scubadive of in situ grandmal politics.
Arctic Void (2022)
spectacular nature...
Spoiled by a nonsense story with unprepared and uninspired actors and extras(except the director), maybe a trick of the tail of a norwegian film made in the early 1980's called'' orions belt'', a thriller that is thrilling and much more recommendable than this piece of junk thinks the grumpy old man.
Toc Toc (2017)
i have it...
You have it they have it and everybody has it, a grain or two, of OCD. Im a numbercounter and tiptoes the pavements, and i do reckognize all of it in this duracell driven spanish comedy. Very well acted, hilarious at moments.
The story is really a piece for the theater scene, but the subject has been filmated many times in many languages over the years, but this is close to the tiptop of ocd-acting.
So its a recommend from the grumpy old man.
The Jack in the Box: Awakening (2022)
seems like seven is a lucky number...
In this british jack the box horror flick, written and directed by mr fowler that has fumbled a whole lot on the plot speed, the filmographic brightness gives vibes of 1980's bbc studio tv theater, but thats merely it on the downside.
Its quite good acted, small cast,good screaming, enerving score and sound effects and few sets, light and shadow work are impeccable, and the jack in the box is quite enerving and well acted and styled non-vfx/cgi, the horror segments makes you feel quite uncomfortable and there are a pretty lot of them throughout the screening, so if your nerves are bleeched and your heart faintful, then a small warning to you.
So if you have a tendency towards jacks in a box stories with an alternative clutch on the straw then this might be IT. Of course you couldve written a better screenplay than this you might think, but the grumpy old man , who has shown quite some grit towards british low budget horrorfilmaking may give a recommend to this one.
Penyalin Cahaya (2021)
hardly ever seen...
Any indonesian features in my life, but if this is the mean of their film production, i might start searching for more...
its a film about cheating and exploitation of the young and innocent, some will call it pedophelia, but the root of the story is a girl having a blackout due to alcohol comsume, next day her world is upside down, and she looses all her grants and everyones respect due too social and religious immorale.but this femme aint fatale, she take the burden and starts digging though legal and illegal methods to find out why and how...
the cast delivers very convincingly, the language and cultural barriere makes my evaluatiuon versus the moral code somehow limited,ive worked with 2 indonesians at the nursing home that i work, but having seen western productions over the same topic, i can tell theyve made a good product, as a man i can just say that the actresses casted for this movie is just smashing beautiful, and they could easily enter international fame with good language training.
Filmographically its high standard, some times the cam is too close to lock out surroundings, but the filming techniques are well managed. Also the presentation and use of social media as main source for the action of the movie are brilliant, hollywood prods pepper us with visual sms that comes and goes so fast, here theyve managed to tell the whole story from it, and thus that at a far lower budget...do also sense the abscence of music in large parts of this movie, usually a helping hand for a plot, but appears strong as a method in this flick
so i give my acclamation to the makers, and thanks for an unusual digital investigation.blackouts or not, the grumpy old man had loads of them when young adult and wish i could and would love to rewind and puzzle them together as they did in this flick, but its all over for me noiw and just nightmares of the past, but ill make a note behind my ear for my next lifetime.
A recommend for the acts, filming and story comes from the grumpy old man.
The Free Fall (2021)
its just...
A dream just a dream, said REM while falling asleep in a corner, of a beautiful old masion , fully equiped and stashed with artifacts thatll trill and draw you into a ghostly mood in the start, theyve engaged one of the most goodlooking curly brunettes ive seen since my wife stopped colouring her hair, but the story, plot, repetitive wake ups and reoccuring bloody sceenes, with a throatslithering aka Arne Nordheim the norwegian composer styled score, some strage or estrange love and relationships, that shows that falling in coma might be better than this.
Its an art noir of glory gory days, for the alternative filmstyle enthusiast, and that is not me.a non recommend from the grumpy old man.
Sex Appeal (2022)
wow wow... (a trash worthy review over a tender topic)
Said the flabbergasted hounddog, not knowing what to say other than that this is a very sexual vocabularized, and tinky winky virginity lost in the svamp called general knowledge, or just how to find the way through the jungle for an ever so innocent, ''dont need to know yet'', teenage girl that hasnt quite had her hormones boiled into the stew called sex yet, so therefore i declare that the age limit for this one should be at least 10 years, because its stunning and hits the balls of fire or the bulls eye over and over again, in a lovely , hilarious way that made me, the ever so dried out cod of a grumpy old man, laugh out loud, and has if possible given me some more fruitful and fantasizing days to live.( the say a good laugh prolonges living)
Its a story about pertinent innosence, flirting relationships, kissing and hugging, grasping and fumbling, and a film thats just screams ''i want it all, and i want it now''. The whole cast, even the computer voice delivers all over the ledge, making even ''kissing booth 2'' desperate due to develish competition.
Productionwise its a typical glossy and overstaged teenage comedy, where the verbal flow is under the influence of speed, and the icy moral tippingpoint might be heavy for some, because its all about the most forbidden topics in the world and dont come tell me to learn sex from your parents cause thats called incest, and to ask questions of its kind to your adult peers is just a shameful piece of burden, so let the film answer your inquest...
so my advice to you,if youre still a mouthful of bragging is to enter this viewing session with your sense of humour switched on, have some coke and dig out your cheese doodle if youre as mature as me and if you want to extend your sexvocabulary in general then ''sex appeal '' is a good place to start, a big and bold recommend and my acclamation goes to hulu for their do or dare mentallity.
The Curse of La Patasola (2022)
the learning curve is steep...
But to make a horror movie like this, even on homemade scale and underbudgeted, and with such headshaking and so inconcievably unconvincing actors talking dull dialouges in the car, the tent and around the camp fire, well youll be unfortunate if you find anything worse than this.
Stay away is the grumpy old mans advice.
Eternals (2021)
for the fans and all...
About the marvel superhero universe, and my universal vision is that there aint much twist in the goodybag, they tend to last too long and the plotspeed unbelievably slow, the scripted dialouges are itchingly irritatingly bad and expected and the grumpy old men like me strives to stay awake through 150 minutes...i'm not over excited by the choice of cast, and the casts delivery that seems like stumbling and commanded at moments, and that may also be due to bad ''taken water over thy head'' direction. I do also react that they do not use indeginous peoble like a samii or an aborigin actor in the superhero choir...an idea to follow up?
But some things are good, vfx and cgi do make this a viewable encounter, the score is good, and the hindi-punjabi insertions of ''birdie num num'' comedy made me smile inbetween. So if you have a wooden club that you cut notches in for each superhero movie you have seen, then its a go for it.for us norwals ill recommend a try but not more than that...
The Tender Bar (2021)
very nice float...
In an elsewise skipstone splashing, and flashback narration presented story, an egobiopic of a fractured but even though that, a nice childhood many people may reckon cause i lived there and loads of youngsters of today will envy due to digitized overkill and isocialisation.
Production gives a near perfect timestamp of them good ol'days, very nice stashed sets, nice cars and choice of music that may declare some dendrites reopened in mr alzheimers brains,...''yeah i remember that tone shift, so lets ''do it again'' yeah''...
nice cast all over, the only thing missing mr Moehringer and mr.clooney is the promise to make a sequel and the rest of your JR -lifestory and shrouded secrets. A recommend is given by the wise grumpy old man.
Dead Man's Switch: A Crypto Mystery (2021)
never flip a coin...
That you cannot hold on to, its a complex story of decieft and murder within the league of cryptocurrencies,and how governmental agencies strives and fumbles like a blind wallaby whitewashed with bleech called shell companies and dark matter of the web searching for money that arent there other than the fantasy pockets of a criminal monopoly player, well worth viewing.
Alex Murdaugh: Death. Deception. Power (2021)
first and foremost...
Id like to say that the way oxygene is treating this case is close to murder of reputation, there are next to none statements from legal prosecuters nor sheriff's or police departments. Also its a case that hasnt been thouroughly treated in the justice system yet, and i feel that the head investing journalist in this oxygene special loves to shine like a sun on the tv, and loves to spin the wheel of the devil of intricacy and enshroudment thats coming close to the border of impertinence. So dont take your mouth too full of whats the'' facts'' in this case, they shouldve awaited the finish of the planned trials and make their investigative conclusions after that.
Having seen this soap opera of classic south carolinan aristocracy ruling and tampering its neighbourhood with good/rotten deeds with all kinds of damage done with or without the help of...you name it... i may say that it is very suspicious acts done, and there maybe something within the heresays and clues, i hope a sequel will come that may indicate that they were true in their speculations, im just so grumpy and old a man that has learned the competence of patience and not squeeling out loud that this is the killer without doupt when the doupt are still there.
Watch it and think a little ,is this good true crime journalism?
Monsters in the Closet (2022)
its time to tell...
The story about how we tuned into dead meat or in a more metaphysical term zombies. A home/amateur-made horror anthology that takes you through the register of ''we move straight on'' zombriery, from the archtypical chronic arthrithis moving parkinsonal huntingtonians lepralibertarians, to the hilarious couple renovating their house while being deterioratingly in love with eachother( this part makes it a four and affordable to watch), but allover its moviemaking that every military base medical department crew or aiseeyu unit couldve made using fake masks of wounds and bloody bandages. Filmtechnically its a poutpourie of glitches and cheap trix that the seasoned sausage of gorecorians have seen before
a film for the gore and vomit lovers, not so much for a grumpy old man.
Rucker (2022)
a roadhouse sillysism blues...
Or a yawn from the drivers seat, having spent near 100 minutes of my life watching this amateurstricken horrormocumentaryslashercomedy, about a typical nomadic northamerican truckdriver that turns into a serial killer because his location/dot on the paper map matches the lines of his imaginary paintwork of art, and to make a portrait of lines you will actually need many dots.and each dot is a kill....
itsa repeating story of drivin eating killing and gravedigging, the revealing story of why is pushed in between the lines, a witty lead actor that does his deeds with stern steadiness, but not as funny as they aimed it to be. Any slasher lover will feel the joy from it i guess , i didnt.
What i liked though was the small inserts of animated story, that clutches the drive of kill bill, but thats it. A homeless and toothless whacker story with no sense of ballony, its a no recommend from the grumpy old man.
Iris Warriors (2022)
not for everyone...
But surtainly a smashing blockbuster for everybody that love the art of movement with music, namely ballett, i dont know which balletensemble acts out here, but you wont come nearer to a royal ballet than this on a silverscreen. I am surtainly not a ballerina fan but this was actually beautiful and view worthy.
The dance is superb, the score smashing, the vfx and special effects enchanting, and the use of colours light and shadow will mesmerize you for 80 minutes.
The story is aimed for children( and old children 60+), the story surrounds the topic of ''the creation'' with or without any religious or politicalgoals, a story narrated by ms sybil from downtown abbey, a beautiful actress with a vivid and fairytailenbalming voice that will block out any disturbancies and makes your ability to tunnelview from the pinpoint of the big bang to the end of living daylights, a story that will make your fantasy spin off, and without much doubt i will call this film a delicassy of a cultural sweetened independent filmaking of high technical standard.
So let your iris become sore of the warriors of light, dark and colours and feed your corona fatigue due to shutdowns and quaranteens, this is food for the squemish among us, and of course the grumpy old man. A recommend.
Goe-gi-maen-syon (2021)
spooky...
An unlike much korean features,very compact.ill bet youve seen such plotlines in the past,but the intensity made me pause thrice just to man up.tgom recommends.
De uskyldige (2021)
thank god that...
The child actors do know how to act and dictionize their roles very well, because the adult cast does glitter in their absence of acting talent.ive never seen or heard any adult norwegian actors speak and act so bad ever....! And mr director...there are several ways to solve flops like this , a skin squeeze might help, a dozen retakes would lso help, or a remake with a whole new crew wouldve done the deeds...
its a norwegian soup au horror, slow paced and strange, kids with grunge, parents withoutabilities, psycich abilities and childrens urge to explore the frontiers of never ever land.its also a family structure study, and a pretty daring use of immigrants in very exposed roles in the plot.
But grumpy as i am like, always, there will not be a red flag of glory risen for this flick, my expectations from extravagant reviews in norwegian media where utterly crashed, and when i thought the film should really take off, then came the end and the list of cast and crew rolling backwards as well just like my eyes. Im not much patriotic on behalf of norwegian film after watching this low budgie movie.
Harry Potter 20th Anniversary: Return to Hogwarts (2022)
are you a potter??
Fan, then this will be a very well deserved nightcap, and the best way to incinerate a global ''binge'' fever of harry potter nostalgia. Im just a grumpy old man with not more nitwitt than moaning myrtle
, i have never been thrilled by the books and were far to old to let my wizardous parts of myself loose, and even though i got lost in the translation in the last 3 films, i do adore the choice of cast that has carried this world of wizardry into our own homes and castles, and just admit that the 3 first films sold me in forever, and my binging night will start pretty asap. I think we will never have a story like this told again made in this way of magic development of filmatographical technology development, if so ,do tell me about it, pretty quickly ,i must say because im a cranky grumpy and very old dumbledoor kind a man with not so much time left, so let me know.
What i can say though with a lumpy throat and stinging eyes from nostalgia, is simple to say, watch this and see to that you dont miss it. And to the producers of this mecca of mystery, try to put together something outta the deleted scenes and stuff, cause thats the real treasure that has never been released yet...
Red Rocket (2021)
a reflection on...
The american working class, not a blockbuster for the big movie market, but still okeish considering budget and cast. Mr fox does his trot very well, making this former superfiscial ultrasuper pornstar figure into a comedy, with a knife litterally on his neck all the time.
Some production glitches and abrupt editors misclips bounces you through the plot of hudlum and of the grid personalities, there are...but also some decent caracter acting makes this become like a squid in the bubblebath of fish, youll either get eaten or beaten.
The grumpy old man though have gotten confirmation on how the archtypical american looser is, a sicks stars worth red rocket for the new year festivities from the dump yard of the petrolianized and de- gassed one star state of america, and to all texanolians ,dont take this serious.
Last Looks (2021)
mr hunnan...
Does a relly good job acting out as a private eye for an eccentric actor done by not so impressive mel gibson, whos wife has been killed, lets call ths an intro...that is far shorter than the one in the film.
Actually to be a film thats very fixed on that its based on a novel and the novelist himself has laid his hand on the screenplay, makes filmaking alittle bit harder to make, and the to make the squemished bookreader satisfied.
Do take my 6 stars seriously because the draft of the other stars of excellence is purely done by a less than perfect technical production. I do have tinnitus and have to concentrate very hard to catch the vocals and mimicks when viewing a film, and when the background music strangles the dialouge including ambient noise when cardriving and other natural sound in outdoor takes, the i'm down for the count. The choice of score though are good as well as the filmographic techniques chosen, lots of shadow work and vivid use of natural light makes it interesting viewing.i do also consider the roller coaster ride of on/off parkinsonistic plotpace a little bit withering for the story, and the actual playtime are maybe 15 mins too long.
But as a'' rigidly famous actor for hire at half price'' just to pay out my maid, the efforts of superactor mr. Gibson reflects that, he delivers at slightly above average and thats it.
But hunnan, not the chinese hunan, does carry a lot of weight on his shoulders to make this film a peerworthy experience, a should see film filed in the grumpy old mans silverlining playbook, or demented memorabiliae, sitting at the edge of his latter days with otis reading,'' watching the tide roll away''...