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An error has ocurred. Please try againHow effing stupid.
This list features films with one, maybe two, F-bombs which add nothing to the film except causing offence. This is not to say that the films are kids' films - they're not - but they are mostly targetted towards an audience on the young side and/or with an expectation of family viewing (albeit not young children)
The list is in reverse order down to number 20. Then I decided to add more films.
I have tried to leave out films where a central character simply isn't funny (nearly every Jack Black film, for instance).
Reviews
The Diabolical (2015)
Yes, and then what?
Single mother Madison and her two children suffer some horrible creepy grisly menacing thing appearing in the night. Far from accepting the generous offer to buy their house, offered by some sketchy businessman, Madison stays put and subjects her kids to more disturbing events. Instead, she has ago at her son for reacting badly at school, and recruits her scientist boyfriebd to fing a solution.
Full of the usual horror film signature elements, this film leads us up the garden path by being something it's pretending not to be. And that's fine, because it does it quite well. It gives us an explanation,
But the explanation, and the (rather good) twist in the explanation raise further questions. We get the "what", but we never get the "why". And the ending raises yet more questions, which still remain as the credits roll.
It's a shame when a film does an OK job and then so conspicuously fails to stick the landing.
My Best Friend's Exorcism (2022)
Not bad, not great
When Gretchen is possessed by an evil thingy, her friend Abby is the only one who can help her. But Abby is a bit of a victim to start off with, and the wicked thingy is intent on victiming her even more.
Billed as a horror comedy, this has some slightly scary stuff in it, and is sometimes mildly amusing. Having said that, if it was stripped of the bad language and occasionally coarse dialogue, this would be little wose than a PG standard high school movie.
Everything in it is OK. The story is OK, the script is OK, the acting is OK, the production values are OK. It is professionally made, although not excitingly so. Only the soundtrack makes you think, "There are some good song selections here."
It seems to be attracting much criticism by comparison to its source material novel. I haven't read that, so no comment.
Damaged (2014)
Good grief
This is, in fairly broad terms, an urban paranoia/psychological thriller featuring a hugely cunning and resourceful high school student seeking revenge on a hapless teacher.
The overriding feature of this movie is the ability of Sam, the teacher, to make bad decisions. If it's possible for him to make a bad decision, he makes a bad decision. If it's impossible for him to make a bad decision, he still makes a bad decision. Even if no decisions are involved at all, he manages to make a bad - nay, even more diastrously bad than usual - decision. This guy takes stupid to a level seldom seen before on screen. We sat there open mouthed at the non-stop stupidity on display until we realised that this guy was never going to make a not-stupid decision. Then we had a contest, trying to predict the bad decisions before he made them. We fell short much of the time, but we had a LOT of laughs in the process.
To compound the felony, Sam is played by Chris Klein, a good looking man whose American Pie performance got by on two expressions - "I'm cheerful," and "Duh, what's going on?" The latter is used her to excess, joined at the end when the you-know-what hits the fan by expression number 3, "Someone just broke wind, and it's a bad one."
Also, Sam approaches plumbing work with a hammer. When water unsurprisingly sprays everywhere, his reaction is, "Perhaps we should call a plumber." Stupd, stupid, stupid.
This is not a good film, but we did get laughter from it for all the wrong reasons.
Dune: Part Two (2024)
Not as good as part one.
Paul Atreides and his mother are now living with the Fremen following the Harkkonen bid to wipe out clan Atreides. Paul comes to prominence because it seems he may fulfil a prophecy, which may enable him to obtain revenge against the Harkkonens and also the Emperor, who facilitated their action in the first place. But Paul has visions of a war he wants to avoid, and the Bene Gesserit sisterhood have plans of their own.
Part Two picks up where the first film left off, and brings the story to a conclusion of sorts (author Frank Herbert wrote five sequels). I was a huge science fiction reader when the original novel was published, but I had a great deal of trouble with it. Its texture and density was a bit too much for me in my mid-teens, and previous film versions didn't help much. I was pleased with Villeneuve's film from 2021, because I could finally follow the story without confusion.
Part Two - not so much. The narrative is fairly straightforward, but it often felt as if exposition had been omitted. For instance, Lea Seydoux appears in some tight closeups and meaningful dialogue: she plays Lady Margot Fenring. Who? This is presented as a character of significance, a name actress with image and dialogue delivered using film grammar which shouts Significant! Yet we don't know who she is or why she matters, and we never hear from her again.
The performances are good, the visuals are great, but again the story proves difficult to convey without confusion. It's a good film, but it's something of a disappointment compared to its predecessor,
Wicked Little Letters (2023)
Good, but...
In 1920 Littlehampton, prim Christian spinster Edith starts getting anonymous profanity-laden offensive letters, and others subsequently join the mailing list. The blame lands on her bawdy unfiltered Irish single mother next door neighbour Rose, who is soon in danger of prison and losing her daughter. Fortunately, Woman Police Officer Gladys is sure of Rose's innocence and has ideas about how to find the culprit. Unfortunately, Gladys is constrained by the police force's view of her gender.
The trailer for this film looked hilarious (and, to be, fair, it is often very funny), but it is much darker, and with far more drama than I expected. I enjoyed it, but it is not the film I expected it to be. The humour almost all derives from the improbably florid obscenity of the letters and its delivery by straight-laced people who are horrified (and occasionally secretly delighted) by the filth they are uttering. There is also a very short and hilarious sequence of Gladys throwing a silent tantrum in frustration at being stonewalled by her superior.
It is based on a true story, albeit one suspects some liberties have been taken, though not with the framework of the tale. And therein lies my main reservation. This is a period piece, but it is fatally undermined by anachronisms, which fall in two main areas.
One is dialogue. There are verbal expressions and vocabulary choices which are distractingly modern. The other is colourblind casting. I don't normally have a problem with colourblind casting, but in a period piece like this, a black judge in southern England in 1920 is distractingly inaccurate. Worse, Gladys is played (rather wonderfully) by Anjana Vasan, an actress of Indian heritage. The screenplay repeatedly makes the point that she is denigrated because she is female, but her race is not mentioned. In 1920, it would have been and I fear that, laudable is these casting choices might be in principle, in practice they served to pull me out of the story.
But Olivia Coleman has great fun as Edith, Jessie Buckley is an utter joy as Rose, Anjana Vasan is comically deadpan, and Timothy Spall gives depth to arguably the most difficult character - all the performances are good, and the film is well worth watching on that basis alone. As long as you don't mind a bit of bad language! Or a lot...
Madame Web (2024)
Don't believe all the negativity
Cassie is a paramedic, daughter of a scientist mother who was murdered by the mysterious Ezekiel while researching spiders in the Amazon: an Amazonian tribe of spider-type natives delivered Cassie. She finds herself having flashes of the future, leading to her becoming involved with three teenaged girls.
This film is getting some highly negative feedback, and I was expecting the worst. I was pleasantly surprised: it's not bad. It's not great, either - it is somewhat muddled in terms of exposition: given that this is essentially a superhero origin story, it would have been helpful to have ended up with a coherent explanation of who had what powers and how, but no.
But at its heart, we have a character who is emotionally disconnected, and who begins to change even before learning the reason why. Cassie is likeable, as are two of the three teens, and even the third one has made progress by the end.
I admit that I'm easily pleased, but I think this film, like Marvels, is actually quite a lot better than the impression you will probably have got.
Migration (2023)
Good fun
Mack is Dad to a family of ducks who live on a small pond. He is also highly timid, in contrast to the rest of the family, who fancy venturing away from the safety of the pond. And, of course, the eventual trip leads to a series of, ah, adventures.
This is a fairly simple tale, a series of obstacles/incidents in the course of journeying from the opening situation to the final situation. But the events are exciting and entertaining, the voice acting is excellent, a number of the character arcs are significant and pleasing, and there are a number of sequences which are genuinely exhilarating.
I really liked John Powell's music.
Anyone But You (2023)
Likeable
Bea and Ben hook up after a chance encounter, but a couple of misunderstandings the following morning leave them aggressively at odds. Two years later, Bea's sister is marrying Ben's friend Claudia in Sydney, meaning the mutually hostile Bea and Ben will be stuck in each others company for a period. While assorted members of the wedding party try to engineer rekindling a romance by way of overheard conversations (If only she knew he really loves her), Bea's parents are trying to get her back together with her ex-boyfriend.
There's nothing revolutionary here. The manipulative overheard conversation was a major plot device way back in Shakespeare's Much Ado About Nothing (I was pleased to see this acknowledged in the film), although it is a) not played out as expected, and b) given a pleading payoff at the end.
Overall, the film is likeable, often amusing, a couple of outright laughs, and a pleasant way to spend an hour or two. Bea's helicopter parents are annoying in their unwillingness to accept their daughter making her own decisions, and Bea and Ben are often bordering on being aholes, although their basic likeability saves the day.
I was aware of Sydney Sweeney, but only as a pneumatic young woman with a propensity for removing her clothes. Here she adds a definite screen presence, a solid touch for comedy, and a genuine ability to act. Plus she co-produces. I must stop prejudging.
Argylle (2024)
Utter nonsense, but hugely entertaining
Elly is on her 5th successful novel about superspy Argyle (played out visually by Henry Cavill) when she finds herself caught up-in real life spy shenanigans. To say any more would spoiler things, and I don't want to do that because the implausible plot twists are all part of the fun.
If you enjoyed Kingsman, you will enjoy this. It, too, isn't believable in the slightest, but that doesn't stop you enjoying the romp. And if you enjoyed the Busby Berkeley exploding heads sequence in Kingsman, you ain't seen nothing yet. The action sequences here are nothing short of hysterical.
Bryce Dallas Howard enjoys a role which gives her plenty of opportunity to have fun, although the gown she wears during the climax doesn't flatter her. Nice callback to Jurassic World, though.
This is just plain draft, over the top fun.
The Beekeeper (2024)
The Stathe strikes again! Frequently.
When online scammers strip Eloise of every penny, leading to her suicide, her beekeeper friend Clay determines that there needs to be some accountability.
You know what you're getting with a Jason Statham film - it does what it says on the tin. And the action subgenre "You shouldn't have messed with someone who has a friend/family member with a very particular set of skills" is always enormously satisfying when well handled.
And it is well handled here, both the hand-to-hand stuff, and the broader set pieces.
The scammers in this case aren't based in Mumbai but are much closer to home, and there are some fun plot twists. The supporting cast are good (Josh Hutcherson is very effective as the chief (or is he?) baddie).
This is a satisfying action thriller, with an ending which is about 5 minutes too abrupt - there are several characters/threads which deserved a bit more wrap-up.
Poor Things (2023)
Fantastic looking, weird, somwhat worrying, but I liked it
Hideously disfigured doctor Baxter is parent (or is he?) to young woman Bella, who is plainly not anywhere near "normal". He engages young Max McCandles to be a live-in recorder of Bella's development and progress. Then seducer and cad Wedderburn arrives on the scene, and entices Bella away to a vacation of exploration, both geographical and sexual. This bare bones synopsis skips backstories as well as what happens on and after the tour, but all of which are integral to what happens
At the outset, let me say that production design, set design, costumes and sound design are all stunning, and I will be surprised not to see Oscar recognition in these areas. As for the rest...
We humans learn from experience - we experience people, our environment, and also fiction. From text and screen we learn the language of fiction: how stories are told, and their content. And, usually, if a fiction is fantasy and the setting is not immediately recognisable, we will nonetheless recognise the characters and the relationships between them.
This is the third Yorgos Lanthimos film I have watched (after Dogtooth and The Lobster) and, like its predecessors, it is an arthouse film presenting huge problems for a viewer expecting anything conventional. Dogtooth had a relatively conventional setting and character dynamics which were anything but, and The Lobster was skewed in every way. Poor Things is also skewed (it appears to be set in the late 19th century in a world which is not really similar to our own), but it is far more recognisable as a conventional story - not one which will please anyone unprepared for something peculiar and discomforting, though.
Publicity pitches this as a comedy. I beg to differ. There is undoubtedly some very funny stuff here, but I felt like a lot of the comedy was, like Wes Anderson or the Coen brothers: a lot of sniggering behind the camera, and not so much in the audience. Even so, Bellas's mannered thesaurus-driven dialogue is frequently very entertaining.
In fact, I became much more invested than I thought I would, and I was pleased at the fairly conventional resolution.
Emma Stone's performance as Bella has rightly drawn praise (her English accent is wonderful). I don't know if Mark Ruffalo was supposed to be so overstated but, if so, then I guess he deserves praise too.
A word of caution: the film has some extremely fruity language, male and female frontal nudity, some fairly frank sex, and some graphic gore. This is not for the faint-hearted, the conventional, or anyone who dislikes being made uncomfortable.
Becky (2020)
Lulu is good
A year after her mother died, 13 year old Becky's Dad takes her to her mother's cabin in the woods to a) try to reconnect with his disaffected daughter and b) tell her that he is about to get engaged to single mother Kayla who, with son Ty, are also present at the cabin. Becky is not pleased. Also present, however, is escaped convict Dominick and 3 fellow felons. Dad, Kayla and Ty are captured. Becky already had problems to face, and now she has more.
This is a simple premise and devolves into a violent action thriller with genuine jeopardy, and the overriding question - how will a 13 year old girl manage against 4 hardened criminals?
Kevin James plays Dominick. I have little time for James as a "comedy" actor, but he is very good here. He's not as good as Lulu Wilson as Becky, though, who kocks it out of the park, and then some.
Alice in Wonderland (1951)
Belated classic
Young Alice, dreaming (or is she?) follows a white rabbit down a rabbit hole into a world of surreal adventures.
Walt Disney's adaptation of Lewis Carroll's classic was unsuccessful in its day, although the ensuing decades have shown its quality. It is a feast for the eyes, and captures the hallucinatory element of Carroll's prose brilliantly. It suffers somewhat from Americanisation (Carroll is VERY English) and Disneyfication in particular - there are areas which are overy cutesy, and some not-very-good English accents - but the visual imagination is good recompense.
This was ahead of its time.
The Babysitter: Killer Queen (2020)
More mayhem
The Babysitter: Killer Queen (2020)
3 years later, Cole is still getting picked on and, what's more, nobody believes him about the circumstances of what happened 3 years earlier. At least cute neighbour Melanie is on his side, albeit her boyfriend Jimmy is a bit of a Neanderthal idiot. No when Melanie invites Cole for a weekend at the lake, thus avoiding his parents sending him to psycho deprogramming camp, no contest, right?
And so it starts to happen again, because cute girl next door Melanie just happens to belong to the same bllod cult as Bee.
All the things which made the first film successful are here again, including an excellent script and most of the original cast. There is some extreme but cartoonish violence, some fun callbacks, and a nice resolution or two to issues hanging over from the first movie.
An enjoyable horror romp.
Fall (2022)
Well, the visuals are good
When her husband falls to his death, climber Becky loses all appetite for climbing. A year later old friend and now selfie internet streamer Hunter manages to talk her into cimbing a 2,000 foot disused telecommunications tower in the desert. Because what could possibly go wrong? Apart from part of the rusted old ladder falling off, leaving them stranded on a tiny platform 2,000 feet up? You know, that old thing.
This film is an odd mixture of the very good and the very bad. The very good is that the film is incredibly well staged. The visuals leave you in no doubt that these two women are climbing, and getting stuck at the top of, this huge, incredibly skender needle, piercing up into the sky.
The bad? The two women, particularly Hunter, are so amazingly, annoyingly stupid, that you are actually rooting for them to pitch headllong to a richly deserved demise. No-one knows where they are, they have taken no safety precautions, they have inadequate communications equipment, and oh dear what are we going to do now? It's called consequences, dearie.
I Care a Lot (2020)
Marked down for nihilism
Marla Grayson (Rosamund Pike) and her girlfriend Fran have an efficient but repellent legal scam in operation: with the connivance of a tame doctor and an easily manipulated judge, they are able to make vulnerable wealthy elderly people wards of court, put them into care homes, isolate them from family, and prevent them from contacting the outside world. They can then systematically liquidate their estates, being legal guardians of record. Then they make the mistake of working their scheme on Jennifer who they believe to have no family. Except there is a reason why Jennifer appears to have no family. Marla may have bitten off more than she can chew, but she's not going to go down without a fight.
There are no good people in this film, it is entirely a matter of who is the least vile. And that is probably Roman (Peter Dinklage), Jennifer's son, because we don't actually know the specifics of what he does, whereas we have seen from the start how Marla will callously sacrifice people in order to harvest their estates.
The plot is interesting, albeit I have my doubts as to whether it will stand up to a rigorous legal examination, and there is some fabulous acting. The final denoument is satisfying, although I hoped for a rather more poetic commeuppance than the possibly more realistic resolution of the Roman/Jennifer plot.
The Babysitter (2017)
What a difference a good script makes
Cole is 12, a bit of a nerd, bullied at school, and a bit of a victim generally, not least because his parents still insist on having a babysitter for him when they go away. However, since Bee the babysitter is a gorgeous leggy blonde who shares many of his nerd interests, this is less of a hardship than you might think. Then Cole is presented with the idea that he should find out what Bee gets up to after he has turned in, and the spicy truth or dare party... let's say it goes elsewhere.
This film is very well written, and starts out as a keenly observed fish-out-of-water teen comedy before taking an abrupt left turn into graphic, and very funny, horror.
It benefits from wonderful performances from Judah Lewis as Cole and Samara Weaving as Bee, but everyone is good.
A cut above the usual horror.
Wish (2023)
Disappointing
An island kingdom features its inhabitants happily surrendering their dearest wishes (which they then forget) to the compassionate curation of sorcerer king Magnifico (red flag name, there). 17 year old Asha, auditioning to become the king's apprentice, discovers he has no intention of ever allowing the majority of wishes to be granted. She makes a wish (18 is the age at which people give up their wishes), and a wishing star comes down and proceeds to create havoc, resulting in Magnifico giving in to paranoia and megalomania.
This Disney CGI feature looks great. It clearly draws a great deal of visual inspiration from the world of Shrek (Asha is obviously a close family relation of Rapunzel as they have exactly the same mouth) and there are countless nods to other Disney properties, ranging from affectionate homages to outright ripoffs (hands up those who watched the escaping wishes and went, "Oh! The lanterns from Tangled!" I thought so).
Chris Pine'# voice characterisation of Magnifico, starting out well-meaning but conceited, declining to outright evil, is excellent, and the other voice work is good. And then...
The songs are forgettable. And the delivery and/or sound mixing often means that you can't make out the words anyway. Also, frankly, they aren't necessary. The best Dusney songs move the plot along: these don't. They're just... there.
But the biggest flaw with this film is the story, which hasn't been fully thought through. I have no problem with the magical mechanics of it, but does everyone only ever have one wish in their life? How does that work? And the wishes we see all seem to be the tiniest bit pedestrian. The central conceit of the movie failed to have me believing in it, and I'm pretty good at believing the unbelievable.
This one was a bit disappointing.
The Hunger Games: The Ballad of Songbirds & Snakes (2023)
Quite good
In the early days of the Hunger Games, poorly-off Panem Capital aristo Coriolanus Snow becomes mentor to District 12 tribute Lucy Grey Baird. In the course of trying new ideas, such as getting the audience to like Lucy (she's a good singer), he falls for her and determines to make sure she survives.
I quite enjoyed the books and the previous films so I was up for a prequel (I haven't read the prequel novel). And it's not bad. The war is much more recent, which shows everywhere - even the capital is somewhat down-at-heel. Everything is considerably lower tech, and the film portrays a believable earlier era to what we have previously seen.
The cast are fine, with Peter Dinklage's final scene showing what a great actor he is, and Viola Davies delivering a character even more cold-blooded and scary than Amanda Waller.
And the story is involving and often goes in unexpected directions. At 150+ minutes, my attention never wandered.
Thanksgiving (2023)
Obvious, but fun
When the store owner's family and their friends are given a highly visible (through the store's door and windows) first bite at Black Friday, an angry and greedy crowd easily overcome the measly security and become a baying mob with a lust for blood and air fryers. People die, and footage floods the internet. The following year, someone is out for retribution...
This is a straightforward gory horror, trading on assorted questions - who will survive, how imaginative will the deaths be, and who is the killer? Well, there is one surprise in answer to the first question, lots of imaginative gory fun in answer to the second, and the third? Well, it irked me a bit. Yes, you could guess the killer (I did), but you shouldn't have been able to, because the motive wasn't revealed until after the killer was revealed, and there was nothing even hinting at the existence of that motive.
But that's not what you're here for, is it? You're here for over-the-top gory murders, and they are here in spades.
There is one jump scare, and it's a doozy.
Five Nights at Freddy's (2023)
Yeah, all a bit meh
Mike's spirit has been crushed ever since his kid brother was abducted. He is now guardian of his sister, who was born after the abduction. But he can't hold down a job, and their aunt (who they both dislike) wants to claim custody. Then he gets a night watchmen job at a derelict play centre-cum-pizza joint populated by giant animatronic robots. The place has a histotpry of child abductions, and the robots may not be quite as derelict as expected.
This is apparently based on a video game, I had no idea. I quite liked that it didn't always go in the direction I expected. Having said that, the direction it went in didn't always make a whole lot of sense.
The robots are creepy but not scary. There is some gore, but it is largely shied away from. There is a baddie, but he is introduced at the end and comes out of the blue. The whole thing feels as if it is assembled by numbers by someone who is number blind. With the best will in the world, it tries but doesn't really succeed on any level.
The Marvels (2023)
I enjoyed it very much
A rather aggressive Kree lady finds a bangle which we, the audience, recognise as the twin of the one which gives Kamala Khan her Ms Marvel powers (if you haven't seen the TV series, this becomes clear later on). The Kree lady immediately embarks on assorted cosmically destructive shenanigans: a side effect is that using their powers results in Carol Danvers (Captain Marvel), Kamala Khan (Ms Marvel), and Monica Rambeau (...uh... Monica Rambeau) to change places. Things need sorting out.
This movie has come in for a lot of criticism as well as poor box office (so far). I am happy to go against the prevailing school of thought and say that I absolutely loved it. I sat there with a huge goofy smile on my 71 year old white non-denominational male face throughout its running time, and loved every second.
The spacefaring stuff is adequate, the reappearance and plot relevance of Goose the Flerken is fine, and it's good to see Kamala's family cameo, and nicely in character. For those who love continuity and interconnectivity, there are good doses of that too. Yes, there is stuff which allows nitpickers to nitpick, and for those looking to find fault, you will.
But the heart of this film is the developing relationship between the three main characters: Carol Danvers' ongoing struggle to recover what the Kree stole from her and the consequences of her promise to take down the Kree High Intelligence, Kamala Khan's hero worship for Captain Marvel, and Monica's deep hurt that her Auntie Carol broke her promise to be right back notwithstanding the Blip and Marie Rambeau's death. There is some genuine heart here.
The fight scenes with the three changing places are amazingly choreographed and managed SFX-wise.
The mid-credits scene - well, don't miss it!
Cat Person (2023)
Nice try, but a bit boring
20 year old student Margo, while working at a cinema concession, encounters Robert. They strike up a text message-based friendship, although their personal interactions remain awkward and interspersed with Margo's imaginings of what might go wrong. This relationship develops to the point where they have sex, following which things don't really develop constructively.
I knew nothing about this film going in: I assumed from the title that it was going to be a horror a la Cat People. But no, it's a king of psychological thriller crossed with a feminist polemic (most of the creatives behind the camera are women, and there's nothing wrong with that).
And, to be fair, the film is about sexual power politics and, while it recognises that men can pose a physical danger to women, it also recognises that women can destroy men with mere allegations. It draws no conclusions, and that's fair enough, but it paints an unremittingly dark picture of what is essentially an ill-matched, ill-considered relationship arising from mismatched expectations and poor choices.
It's an attempt to do something worthwhile and interesting, and it partially succeeds, for which I praise it but, to be frank, it's a bit boring.
James Paul McCartney (1973)
When it's good it's good. But when it's not...
James Paul McCartney (1973)
It was a time of flared trousers, platform shoes, dungarees, and mullets. And Paul McCartney was favoured with an hour's TV special which had every appearance of being a vanity project (it wasn't, it was a tradeoff as part of a dispute over songwriting rights).
It seemed to have occurred to someone that this would be an ideal opportunity to showcase not only Wings and their new recordings, but also Paul McCartney the all-round entertainer. I recall that the last time McCartney and chums endeavoured to display their chops as all-round entertainers was the Decca audition, and we all know how that turned out.
To be fair, there is some good music here: some interesting alternate versions and some pleasing live work from Wings. In particular, Henry McCullough is a keen participant throughout, at least insofar as any of the other Wings are allowed to be more than an instrument-playing piece of scenery.
And then there are three big Oh Dears.
One: the public sing Beatle songs. Grim.
Two: family singalong in a pub. This isn't that bad an idea, but a) it goes on far, far too long, and b) Paul is so camera-aware while trying to appear not to be that it's embarrassing. But it's nice to see Jim and Auntie Jin.
Three: Gotta Sing, Gotta Dance. The song is so-so. The routine - a dance sequence featuring dancing women in vertically divided male/female costumes, and Paul in a pink tux and sticky-on pencil moustache - is horrific. The reason for this is that Paul can't dance, a fact which speeding the film up fails to disguise. The pencil moustache and centre-parted brylcreem hairdo would have worked with short hair: the mullet looks AWFUL.
Gotta Sing, Gotta Dance. My sainted *rse.
The Bruce McMouse Show (1977)
Concert OK, but...
Paul McCartney tells us a true story of how, in the course of a live performance by Wings, the band encounters a family of animated mice: Dad, Mum, brainbox Swot, dollybird daughter Swoony, and would-be roadie Soily. Over the course of 53 minutes, the mice get up to not very much while Wings play a dozen or so numbers.
The idea of a family of mice living under the stage while interacting with the band was conceived by McCartney in 1972, and the script (which has McCartney's hamfisted fingerprints all over it) and live footage was shot then, with Wings mk 2 (Paul and Linda, Denny Laine, Denny Siewell, and Henry McCullough. By 1977 - McCartney's wheels sometimes turn very slowly - the animation was done, ditto the voices for the mice, these being provided beautifully by British comedy stalwarts Deryck Guyler, Pat Coombs, and Derek Nimmo, as well as a toe-curlingly embarrassing vocal performance of toe-curlingly embarrassing dialogue by McCartney as Soily. Linda also does a voice.
The mice are a nice idea, but nothing worthwhile is done with them. The live stuff is not bad, and shows that a) this iteration of Wings could cut it live, and b) some of the material from some of McCartney's weakest albums was actually tolerable on stage. The framing stuff, with Paul assuring the audience that this really happened, confirms what a bad actor he is.
It's pleasing to see Henry McCullough entering into the spirit of things, clearly on board with the notion that Wings was an actual group, not just Paul McCartney and a bunch of sidemen.
The fact that it didn't see the light of day until forming part of 2018's Red Rose Speedway archive special edition speaks volumes. It joins Magical Mystery Tour and Give My Regards To Broad Street as evidence that Paul McCartney was not suited to making films that involved him in doing anything other than being a musician.