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Missed opportunity... How it should've ended.
I'll say this about the SPOILER, if you regularly watch slasher films, not a spoiler really. Like we all know James Bond beats the villains or their plot in every movie, we all know that most superheroes win in most films. So why does a potential genre redefining film follow the exact formula and shoehorn two unseen characters and an apparent "romance" in the end? Most likely we'll never know the answers to the question I posed. I however can tell you how the second half SHOULD have ended.
The methodically planned out killing and slaughter? Should've all fallen apart hilariously yet gory and fun. The "Jock" should've been injury stricken with something like crutches and a leg cast, or pretending to be a jock but outed as a poser. Stoners should've lost their stash and turned out to be quite shockingly smart while lucid. Some of the victims should've either accidentally killed themselves or others. The car should've worked, but had missing parts, like the escaping survivors are pulled over for non functioning tail lights and arrested for the now found missing stoner stash. The "Ahab" should've been revealed as incompetent.
The most unforgivable thing is obviously the chemistry and potential romance between the girl and the killer. The girl should've saved the killer from being killed by someone, or refused to finish the killer because she just couldn't. I feel that the Walking Dead's Scott Wilson should've revealed that his wife was a survivor that he just couldn't kill or fell in love with. "I set off my bear own trap, my mask fell off, she started to remove the trap, we looked into each other's eyes, and she metaphorically put me in a ball and chain. Been together ever since!" The age difference screamed that, right? You want a sequel and cult classic status? Sequel should've had the girl and Leslie together and had him continuing to "work" and the comical stresses and complications his career/hobby puts on the relationship.
I mean if you put all that work into a mockumentary or comedic tone, pull the trigger and don't wuss out. Should've been the slasher version of "What We Do In The Shadows"! Spent most of the second half waiting for a better ending that never came... Watch "Miss December" instead of this. It's not a mockumentary, but definitely has a better payoff and ending!
Screen Junkies Roasts (2016)
Funnier than most real roasts.
I LOVE these roasts. There are a few missteps in the jokes, but most are pretty solid. These roasts aren't afraid to delve into MANY different continuities and make jokes only super fans would get now and again. For the most part these roasts are well cast, are very profane, and the comedic timing is near perfect. You will NEVER see a roaster as bad as "The Situation" was on that one Comedy Central Roast (google at your own risk, so bad...). Expect to have favorite roasters, many of the actors keep coming back in the others and are heavy hitters. One comes back as Negan, Professor Snape, Leto's Joker, and The Emperor of the Sith. Another is Rick Grimes, Peter Pan, Bucky Barnes (Winter Soldier), and Anakin Skywalker. Another is the Hulk, Beast from Beauty and the Beast, and Hagrid. Expect to dread the roast's having to end, clearly everyone is having fun and it's always sad to have to stop watching. I really hope they make more, and soon!
The Following (2013)
Where do I start? The first 5 minutes were dry and boring. They showed an ordinary prison break scene that had me wishing I was watching Prison Break instead. Then they introduced us to Ryan Hardy, TV's weakest protagonist. They showed the character Shawn Ashmore played (with a ripped off name from Burn Notice) first as a jerk to Hardy, then as his number 1 superfan not even a whole minute later. I'm going to skip most of the plot mainly because most of it wasn't very memorable, they of course showed the part with the ignored psycho with an ice pick that, if you've watched television at any time in the past 3 months, must've been shown as an ad no less than 200,000 times. Thus having zero percent shock value as everyone who's seen the ad once would've known what was going to happen. Then the big finale, the showdown between the hero and the villain, and the hero saves the damsel in distress. Well that didn't happen. The hero got winded and worn out after going up the stairs just one floor, forced himself to go up another floor, then practically near death, promptly got the smackdown put on him by the villain. He revealed the damsel's mutilated corpse and played a recording of her pain filled screams for the hero to listen to. Just as the hero is about to avenge the dead girl, in comes the "horrible timing cavalry" to save the villain's life from the "evil" hero and practically gave him a medal for his fine work/murder. I quit after that and refused to watch another minute of it ever again. Don't make the same mistake I did, delete this garbage from your dvr, right now. I give this series my lowest rating of 5 out of 5 Toilets. #WhyKevinBaconWhy?