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Hellborn (2003)
Could've been worse
4 October 2004
First of, I voted this one a 6. I feel like 6 is 60% or a D... maybe a D-.

However, anything lower than that is too low, in my opinion. Anything higher just wouldn't happen. I thought a lot of the acting was either passable or poor. Tiny Lister made this movie, for me. He's great in as an asylum worker. Like in Don Juan Demarco, also. Also, Paynes did a great maniacal character. I thought the creature looked too hokey. The acting of some of the patients (and Payne and Lister) did much better than the lead role. The plot was somewhat unoriginal, and yet also very original at the same time.

Still, I wouldn't flunk this one. I think a D- is sufficient. I'd watch it again, if it was on TV for free, but I wouldn't recommend it except as a last resort. Hey, that's not too bad, considering there's many movies I wouldn't even recommend for that.
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The 3 E's... Exciting, Entertaining, and Energetic
19 September 2004
This movie is what might happen if you take a typical zombie flick and give it a plot, lot's of action, and a large city with PLENTY of extras to show mobs of zombies. It has humor. It has suspense. And it has a plot that unfolds; even if you've played the games, it's got plenty of changes to keep you guessing. With, I might add, several of the game characters (Jill, Carlos, and the little girl). I enjoyed this movie better than any since Lord of the Rings, Return of the King. Not that you could compare the two. It's just that there haven't been too many good movies since then.

Milla Jojovich is really cool and she's a talented actress. Her character really rocks when her hidden secrets come out. Mike Epps kept me rolling with laughter. He's always funny, and it was quite nice and different to see Oded Fehr in this role as Carlos. Cool. As for Sienna Guillory as Jill Valentine... she was a PERFECT match. This movie was very fun and I'd love to see it again and again and again....

I voted 9/10. I thought they out-did themselves on this one and i thought the first one was good....
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Latin Dragon (2004)
I don't like that Raymond!
17 September 2004
This movie made me think of what it might be like if Ray Romano decided to do martial arts. Fabian Corillo looked just like Ray in that one where Ray was trying to act cool and got a tan and dyed his hair black.

Seriously, the acting was pretty bad, and the fighting was pretty... eh. The shots were edgy for the first 3 minutes and then they over-did it with 'edgy'. Then they over-did it with 'edgy'. Then they over-did it with 'edgy'. It was like a broken record with the speeding up and slowing down and almost stopping the camera. It's like back in school if you had the hyper kid running the movie projector. "Stop playing around Tommy!"

Still, there was some minor charm in this film. And to quote Jules Winnfield (Pulp Fiction), "Charm goes a long way." Still, watching it only one time would be fine with me.

Interesting house "the Dragon" has at the end. If you go for that "post-hurricane" look. Was that supposed to be his "Fortress of Solitude"??

If this comes to television, it's worth watching. In fact it has a made-for-TV look to it. 4/10
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Moving and horrifying
9 September 2004
This movie was excellent. There's no point in the film that lacks in anything. Every detail was thought out and it put some serious thoughts into my mind, as to I don't know anyone who would go through this torture if they didn't have to and could use their power and glory to wreak retribution on those that beat him so badly. I like how it didn't paint a pretty picture of Christ's death. As if it could be so easy to be crucified. Well, if not easy, at least something that others might die for.

I really entered the feeling of this film, being drawn in my the music and the emotional outcry it's message was trying to project. Very brutal, yet very well done. 9/10
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Half-Caste (2004 Video)
So bad, that it's... pretty bad
6 September 2004
I want to just thrash and trash this movie. I really do. However, it has a few saving graces. Bear with me, since this movie was just not meant to ever be compared to the likes of "An American Werewolf in London", or "An American Werewolf in Paris", or even "Teen Wolf". This movie was made by a bunch of amateurs out to have fun.

One, it's more fun than any reality show I've ever seen. Not saying much! But, it was actually funny in parts.

It's lack of funding, acting ability, and direction wasn't enough to toss this movie in one swoop. Though, it's hanging over the waste basket by the gossamer strand of a daddy-longleg spider.

Here's what keeps the movie from the blast furnace, for me:

1) It didn't try to take itself seriously at all. It wasn't attempting to be considered a major contender. 2) I liked it better than any reality show or "The Blair Witch Project" combined. I know, a weak point. 3) It had some awesome African wildlife in it to enjoy. Which I did. Also, some of the countryside. 4) In some parts I was actually laughing with the film instead of at it. All through Blair Witch, I was laughing AT it, since it was trying to be serious and gritty. WHich Half-Caste was not.

I gave it 5/10 stars for photography and amateur fun. Were it not for the real wildlife and scenery and light-hearted humor... there was nothing too great here and most will NOT like this film. Definitely anything having to do with the half-caste creature itself was too spectacular.
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