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Terminator: Resistance (2019)
Teyon's love letter to the Terminator franchise.
This is what we've been asking for for years, hoped for on the big screen in Hollywood, and thought we'd get with Dark Fate... but everyone, including Cameron himself got it wrong.
And along comes smaller dev Teyon and knocks it right out the freaking park 1st try.
I was worried about this when I saw the developer and their track record, but they proved that they know their stuff, they had a real love for this franchise and the final result of blood, sweat, metal and tears is the BEST terminator game we have ever gotten. Of which we have far too few, yes.
We get fun combat, surprisingly decent graphics even with the lower budget which is fine because graphics DO NOT make a good game. Something I believe the game critics have forgotten all about these days...
We got lots of customization, gun upgrades, fan service weaponry, good crafting, exploration, small RPG dialog sequences that allow you to interact with characters in both small and large ways. We got sex scenes as well which took me completely by surprise because I had no idea how deep they'd go with their story aspect.
Again, this game just came out of nowhere and I ended up feeling like I was playing a Metro in the Terminator universe. Its so freaking great. The voice acting is quite good, map design is very open and you can go about handling enemies in a variety of ways that all work well and aren't feeling generic.
Why is this? Because if you play on extreme difficulty, which true fans will !, those T-800's will 1 shot you sometimes unless you use cover and dont go full Rambo, which is very tempting nonetheless.
You can place mines, distraction gadgets, use various grenades, stimpaks, upgrade guns, use normal projectile types or laser types and even build tech knives you can sneak up behind terminators with and 1 shot them with a cool stab to the neck ( mo-cap ofc) There are plenty of save stations, crafting stations and shops in camps that never make you feel like you're in dire need to make space for your inventory, with exception to larger weapons. But economically you will never run into issues here. Scavenging is very lucrative, crafting is good and rewarding and its fun too because as your economy builds and scavenging might be a bit tiresome sometimes, you can rely more on the store to buy ammo or bombs and of course loot ammo from Terminators you kill.
The balance is really great and has you avoid being stuck with only 1 replenishment system. The devs want to tell a cool story and engage us, not put us through a grind and that I thank them for.
You also have a cool skill system. Upgrade bagspace, hacking, crafting, weaponry damage, and more. And the final upgrades in these trees come with additional benefits like fun buffs to your overall performance in that specific area. For instance (Damage tree buffs your critical damage and allows you to use terminator weapons.)
Its fun, not repetative at all, and its scary too because the enemies are pretty nasty with some of their abilities and although the accuracy can appear a bit random at times, make no mistake. If you stand infront of a T-800 he will kill you. Ain't no QTE to save you from a grab. He will annihilate you.
And I love that. The terminators feel scary. And the music enhances this by being so absolutely true to T1 and T2. that dark, gritty metallic sounds that inspires dread and hope at the same time.
You are in the Future War. And its simply outstanding.
- Few Cons
This is minor stuff that didn't ruin my experience but was still noticable. It would've been nice with a FOV-slider (Total Biscuit is screaming loudly somewhere) It would've been nice with Terminators being more tanky even on higher difficulty. Its really great to feel powerful and our weapons are awesome. But once I get a sniper rifle and upgrade it with damage bonuses or skill points that buff critical damage by 100 %, I'm 1 shotting terminators way too easily.
It might be intended, but it does make the battle against them less scary. So perhaps a fix to this could be not changing the rifle or damage but making the ammunition for the rifle far more scarce or something. Especially considering the laser ammunition is extremely plentiful even on max difficulty.
But this wont be an issue for all people. Some enjoy being very strong and fight back after a hard start. You got that here.
And unlike hack critics who slam this fantastic game simply for not having next gen graphics, I wont place the lesser graphics as a con here because in my book, it has always, and will always go like this:
"Gameplay > Graphics"
Every time. And that is what Terminator Resistance is. A gem, a love letter to Terminator fandom, a wonderful story, great interaction, fun combat, awesome skill system and crafting, refreshing RPG dialog and decisions and scary terminators that make you feel like you're genuinely being hunted for extermination. Fabulous music, tried and true to the original Terminator movies and really well written characters.
It feels like a war for survival. And you are doing your part, working with your friends and John Connor to win.
9 out of 10. A damn good ride, well worth the money and time invested. Thank you, Teyon for keeping these types of games alive, I hope we get a sequel or at least DLC.
I want to see a terminator movie made starring the plot and characters from this game. Take notes, Hollywood. Or rather, just give Teyon the movie rights since they managed to create a genuine success story here with a lower budget. Contrary to 200 million dollar Dark Fate that chose to alienate the fandom instead.
But not this game & dev. Well done, Teyon. Very very well done. Thank you for that.
And btw, cool that you included the little Rambo reference in one of the cutscenes, making a bit of fun of yourself in the process. You guys & gals earned my respect.
Star Wars Jedi: Fallen Order (2019)
Genuinely a wonderful game ruined by 1 big thing for me personally
I'm ready to rate this a 9 out of 10 even...but i can't because of the most important thing in a game about lightsabers.
We have everything going here. Wonderful story, characters, Single player journey, platforming, customizations, lightsabers modifcations and much much more. Its fantastic and refreshing... but there is no dismemerment for humanoid NPC's.
This is such a childish, foolish design decision. You needn't even show blood, or gore, merely dismemberment as per how Star Wars 20 YEARS AGO did it with Jedi Knight.
It is so monumentally annoying and boring to see all these cool animations, fantastic mo-cap and more only to not see any remote freaking impact of the lightsabers. It only happens versus beasts and robots. And it looks fantastic, but not against anyone else.
It is so monumentally freaking stupid when you spend a LOT of time fighting inquisitors, stormtroopers etc. Every kill against them will remind you of this. Its not just something you can ignore, move on with, no. EVERY single kill of consistent Humanoid enemy combat will have you feel " Egh..."
Over... and over again. And it sucks. It ruined the experience for me because whenever a beast appeared and I sliced it in half it just made it all the more worse. Its a litteral tease... throughout the entire game and its impossible to accept it. Let alone the fact that we shouldn't because its stupid.
The game is fantastic, I'd love to rate it higher. Much higher, but I just can't because its ticking me off. We had freaking dismemberment in the 80's in Empire Strikes back, and again in Return of the Jedi ... But we can't have it in 2019 ??
This is absolutely dumb. And the game is worse for it. A crying shame. If you dont care about dismemberment at all, you'll have an amazing time here, but if you do and loved the Jedi Knight games and baseline lightsabers physics... then this will anger you throughout the ENTIRE game. Every duel.
5 out of 10 when it should've gotten 10. The game is 50 % worse because the combat has been 50 % neutered.
For goodness sake, Respawn... Please release modding tools or Dismemberment for Humanoid NPC's and Ill change my rating. If not, then whatever.
A lightsaber is a high temperature laser blade. NOT a freaking baseball bat. How many times do we have to say it... "sigh"
Road Trash (2019)
Damn cool actually. (Spoilers)
Found it by accident.
Films damn good.
Synopsis is as it goes but the ending has a surprise twist.
Dont pick up dead animals or anything dead or you risk getting infected. And thats exactly what happens. She walks around picking up dead things, trying to compassionate or orderly. A grim undertaking but she finds it necessary.
But ultimately ends up with rabies, hallucinating about a werewolf monster and then the film ends.
Its pretty cool, spooky, dark, edgy, and ends with a message that I can get behind.
Good intentions can pave the way to hell. Food for thought, ladies and gentlemen.
I dont know why its getting slammed in terms of its rating, but I liked it.
Pretty cool, fun, dark and with a surprise twist that I didnt see coming remotely. Can recommend to people liking dark shorts or merely want to tell your children to never pick up dead animals.
Haha, have 'em watch this and they wont.
Terminator: Dark Fate (2019)
"Yo guys! How do we tell the same story again without anyone sorta knowing? I know it! Gender Swap time!"
- Here we go again...
The film is a complete, lazy, uninspired cash-grab. They are so disgustingly, shamelessly DEVOID of ideas. I simply dont understand how this is even possible with all the amazing comics, fan fiction tales and James Cameron's own future war concepts being right there for the picking.
Say what you will of Linda's performance being great, of Grace's performance being cool. I don't remotely care because this film has no business even existing. It not only offers nothing new at all and has the stones to tell the same bloody story again, but it goes further than that by outright trying to fool you into believing its original groundbreaking.
How does it do this? By shamelessly exploiting the current cultural phenomena of pushing female super heroes everywhere. Problem is fantastic movies like Wonder Woman that accomplish this well, or Alita: Battle Angel doing even better, this film however just tries to ride that wave with minimal freaking effort and it is making my blood boil.
John Connor is dead. He gets shot in the first 4 minutes of the film. Okay, thats different. Fine. I can deal with that. But now what? Are you gonna come up with some super cool, different concept ?
Of course they aren't. They just replace him with a girl. And nothing at all changes. Like literally, nothing changes. Its so pathetically uninspired and I see people and media praising it for being like The Force Awakens.
Like what the actual F ? How is that a good thing? Ripping off completely and pretending its fine. Its just so typical of entertainment these days. Hollywood is so monumentally bankcrupt of ideas.
- Why not do something actually different?
We could've done something really cool with the future war here. We could've gone further, and now that Linda Hamilton is back they could've made her the leader. Driven by her loss of her son.
Thats a freaking awesome story right there and Linda is still rocking it. But no... instead of doing something cool to respect the original, they throw it all out the window and gender swap John Connor with a chick from Mexico.
And we've established that there is absolutely nothing special about her at all. Now this is once again where the The Force Awakens problem by making your movie political and pushing the agenda that everyone who's not special can accomplish great things.
The only problem with this is that its been done before. And better. I am so sick of this. The director made statements on social media that this movie would scare people who had issues with women. Indirectly insinuating anyone who has a problem with the movie has a problem with women . The film also tries to pander to the current political climate with border talk between the US and Mexico which everyone is sick and tired of but who cares.
I'm simply at a loss for words when I try to figure out what is worse. Heavy political and agenda pushing influence in this movie, by gender swapping a beloved lead character for decades to pander, or by simply using this tactic as a mean of exploitation... to make a really lazy, easy movie and get people to watch it, thinking its some masterpiece... when in truth its just a lazy, pointless remake.
I'll leave that up to you, dear reader, to decide.
- My top 6 Pros and Cons.
Nr 1: Linda was great. Really awesome, believable, strong and epic as always.
Nr 2: Arnold was cringe as Karl the Terminator. So weird, and the little hints at how men should behave made me roll my eyes. Having a non-physical relationship. Yeah right... in what universe, pal.
Nr 3: Mckenzie Davis was really cool. I expected to hate her character but i didn't. I wish she had survived at the end. But nothing good is allowed to exist in this franchise.
Nr 4::Dani was utterly filler. Her entire character is pure filler, pure pandering. This is not how to pass the torch. Wasted character.
Nr 5: The villain isn't scary. They said Rev 9 is the most dangerous terminator. Well, I dont buy it. He's being bullied, bossed around, thrown everywhere, easily kept at bay with guns and overall the nice, calm, human persona of the infiltration behavioral pattern just makes the character look like a really generic villain. Calm, evil, almost psychopathic, but that is not what a Terminator is. And hilariously Arnie's Young Cameo at the start of the movie posed MORE of a threat than the entirety of the Rev 9 throughout the entire movie. It is nothing short of insane how badly they understand what a Terminator is supposed to act like.
Nr 6: And this is possibly the worst part of the film in its totality. The movie has no replay value at all. It is very slow moving, quite boring, it takes so long and wasted so much time running around in Mexico, riding trains to the border, getting caught by border guards, passing out in drugstores etc etc.
Its so god damn boring and the action scenes are few and far between if you can believe it and they aren't very good either.
- Final thoughts
4 out of 10. Lame, uninspired, wasteful, lazy, generic, and perhaps more than anything - desperate - to win whatever audience attendence they can get by pandering and including political elements which will only conclude in the worst crime a movie can commit. Something James Cameron himself talked about in his interviews with great filmmakers alike himself.
That of creating something timeless that can be enjoyed regardless of how old it gets.
And Dark Fate is anything but that... I'm glad Arnie wont be back. I sure as hell won't either.
Rambo: Last Blood (2019)
Pure cinematic action GOLD. Masterpiece! Dont listen to the bloody critics at RT
I just have to say the obvious to begin with. Do NOT listen to the Rotten Tomatoes critics. They are obsessed with politics and have thrown objectivity out the window entirely. Pure application of their obsession with minorities and Trump and bla bla bla... and NONE of this has any remote bearing in this film. The reviews are hateful, and utterly innacurate. No matter your political or religious leanings this film APPEALS TO YOU. Why? Because its emotional, honorable, stoic, brave and it represents the best in people as we on occasion... end up encountering the worst.
Its classic Rambo, everyone. And its so good. Now, to the actual review.
- First and foremost
Lots of bad stuff happens and the film gets insanely brutal. I wont spoil that because I want whoever reads this to go watch the movie. Even if you do it for free for fearing losing money on bad Hollywood films... trust me. Its worth your time. Its a fantastic action film and emotionally impactful as well because of the EXTREMELY well written story. I'll even go as far to compare this film to Logan.
Because we see this amazing man, take on the role of a soldier, of a defender ot peace and guardian of those he loves, fight against horrible monster drugdealers and criminals who hurt him in arguably... the most atrocious way we've ever seen across this entire franchise.
Rambo has lost friends. Family, even felt like his own country turned on him... but this time he loses something he never even thought he'd have. And to be fair, I'm still on the fence whether or not it was a good idea.
- It gets really dark...
But this is the Rambo Franchise... and everyone gets their fair share of pain. Some more so than others. There are no rainbow coloured happy endings here. Its a grim world. But Rambo pushes forward, much like Rocky.
But its sad. Its grim, and sad... and its so damn freaking GOOD. Its so phenomenally GOOD.
There is NOTHING political about this movie. It is a heartfelt, impactful, well written, well acted action film
And now that we've established that as well as RT's critics being borderline nuts and should not be trusted... lets talk about the R Rating and the Action shall we?
- The Action!
It starts slow. It fleshes out the characters and some argue its boring and meh because of that. But I entirely disagree because it makes us understand why this happens, it makes every insanely visually spectacular kill so much better when he finally goes full Green Beret. And we feel his pain which is symbolically present in the final kill of the film. Which I wont spoil.
We get decapitations, explosions, impaled bodies, nails, axes, shotguns annihilating entire heads, rakes going trough ribcages, more explosions, machinegun fire that turn bodies into swiss cheese, his machete makes a comeback, a freaking M1 Garand blowing holes the size of melons, incinerations, stabbings, more stabbings, throat cuts and stabs, deathrattles galore,
"Takes a deep breath"
we get house traps where freaking blades slide open mens heads and them falling through the floor unto a few dozen spikes which turn them into practical human needlecussions, arrow fire and probably more that I can't remember right now because there is SO much. We also see parts of rape, violence against women kidnapped and forced into prostitution, threats that are VERY convincing because John Rambo is freaking scary, and its so good, and we see drugs and needlemarks. Nasty, horrible stuff.
And all of it... shows us the grim, ugly, but important to be aware of reality of the world which John Rambo knows extremely well. We get a grim dark story that the Emperor of Warhammer 40k would come back to life to cheer for. Because it truly is not holding back.
And in all its sadness, horrid evil, it gives us a phemomenal revenge story from a character we all love. Expressing his love and pain through fear and anger, as he takes revenge on the monsters that hurt him unlike anyone to date.
No thats not hyperbolic. Watch the movie and you'll understand.
10 out of 10. Absolute masterpiece. Genuine work of art and after so many sequels I got to say, I am impressed at how the final film turned out so good. Most people would screw it up, forget what made their original film so great "Coughs Predator & Alien" ... But not Sylvester Stallone.
This is a grand epic finale. A truly heartfelt movie. The Logan of the Rambo Franchise.
And what final words do I have to tell the critics who ignore all I've listed and write lies and falsehoods?
Last Action Hero (1993)
A review from an Arnie fan in response to a trash Collider article.
I love this film, grew up with it as a 90's kid and had a blast with Arnie, Stallone and the other legends as my heroes and idols.
This movie has a special place in my heart. So when I rewatched it today, googling afterwards for pure interest I came across this Collider article that had the headline:" Why this movie is a required watch for fanboys who take movies too seriously"
Now. Only only is this article probably written as a weaponization attempt since fan-wars have escalated lately with marvel films and Star Wars, Star Trek etc because of mishandling of properties, so seeing Collider trying to attack us fans this way at first made me angry because thats not at all what this film is about.
The beauty of Last Action Hero, is not just the cool action, kicking bad guys, creative scenes, epic dialog, fun with humor and one-liners, lots of tropes, lots of classic behavior. Making jokes at Hollywood itself, being both 4 dimensional in its scope and having a blast with it, without being remotely generic. Its so creative and fun.
A timeless flick.
But its at the end of the film where Jack is hurt, Danny needs to go back but doesn't want to leave him alone although he's gonna be okay. And Jack says how Danny needs to go back. He needs him to be out there, believing in him. Taking all the good emotions, the thoughts, lessons, all the good stuff we get from these movies and live a long, happy life.
Always knowing our favorite super heroes are nearby. They wont leave our side. We know where to find them. They love us and we love them.
Last Action Hero... isn't a movie preaching at the kids telling them to not take things seriously. Its a LOVE LETTER!... to the fans, letting them know that our favorite action heroes love us, care about our support and want us to believe in them, as well as enjoying our own lives, using all the cool stuff we draw from the movies to enhance our own. Becomes idols ourselves whilst always knowing that our childhood champions will near nearby.
That... is what Last Action Hero is all about. And I wanted to made that clear because of opportunists at these shill websites who love to make stuff up that simply isn't true.
This is one of my favorite films. Childhood favorite, next to Turboman. And it deserves to be highlighted and loved for what it so perfectly accomplished to do.
Giving us a damn good ride, bringing the audience with it, through Danny, representing us as kids, watching all sorts of action, heroism, surprises, humorous one-liner and story developments, so very creatively at that. Hot girls, mega awesome music, fantasy galore and at the end... a love-letter to us viewers.
Who believe, love and adore these films. Our childhood heroes. They just dont make them like this anymore.
A flat 10 out of 10.
And Collider... there is nothing wrong with taking movies, comics, music or any other form of entertainment & Art seriously.
It is because of our passion, our love and FAITH in these characters, franchises that they become so successful. We're passionate human beings. And it feels good to be a fan.
The fact that you guys over there complain about that, says nothing about us, but everything about you. Long live fandom. And masterpieces like this film that is made for us. Respecting us and having a blast whilst taking us to all sorts of mega creative and new heights.
And if anyone still believes that being a big fan is a bad thing... and merely be mindless drones who dont care and thus wont criticise nor love...
Ill respond In the words of Jack Slater himself: "Better to die"
Thank you Arnold and thank you John Mctiernan.
Has some issues but its a fun ride.
I can understand the hate it's getting but in my opinion most of it is overblown.
- The Bad
Wonky dialog at times. Can feel a bit rushy, wording could've used more flow. The phase is off as well from scene to scene. It is pretty obvious that they had issues shooting because the transitioning leaves quite a bit to be desired.
Hellboy's costume design was pretty good overall however I do believe it had some proportion problems now and again. He didn't look as big or broad as he should've during certain scenes.
One too many jokes. Film tried to be a bit too marvel-esque and trying to make your audience laugh too much just ain't gonna work unless you use humor in your cinematography. Comedy however is entirely different because its far less organic and more forced. Thus ending up leaving your audience feeling asked to laugh instead of actually making them laugh.
- The Good
David's performance was super over the top and I liked it. I thought it was crazy good and different from Del Toro's which I appreciate. I am not going to compare the two films because I just welcome both existing.
The action is great, we get to see more demon hellboy using his sword, actually killing Nimue with it at the end too which was very satisfactory. Let alone the definative R-rating which I applaud them for standing true by.
We got severed heads, impaled corpses, big monsters, lots of evil and its great. It is as you'd expect from a movie about monsters and demons. And honestly we dont get enough of this because everything has to be a marvel PG 13 movie these days which I'm getting extremely bored of. This is one of the reasons I welcome this flick. Because of the fact that is is different. Its own thing. Troubled but fun.
Some of the humor is quite good. The destroying of his iphone, his over the top screaming whilst trying to be this bro-ish dude guy who just wants to kick back, have a few bears and chill. Hellboy here is such a cool guy. A very chill guy. Bit goofy, very overly dramatic and I like that. I personally enjoy this particular aspect of him over Del Toro's version because I felt like that Hellboy there began getting a bit too emotional. Too calm and romantic and it just didn't really feel right. I wanted to see more kicking butt and humorous but aggressive behavior and personality.
This Hellboy however isn't having one bit of that. Its full-on screaming, anger frustration and wanting to just figure out his identity issue with being half human and half demon. Which is interesting and really well done too. This film knew what it wanted to be, it didn't have too many subplots going that interfered with the overall arc. Minus the forced comedy from time to time.
The ending of the film is spectacular. We get some real eye-candy and a solid emotional but fittingly so grand finale where Hellboy accepts who he truly is, gets a nice acknowledment from his father, something he was missing and its just such a great form of storytelling when its all rounded up.
Be your own man. Dont let anyone manipulate you. Be strong, be fierce and dont let any presets affect who you truly want to be. It is your choice. And thats a damn good message that I can get behind.
A fathers love and a strong message to be a man. A strong man with a strong spine.
And no matter this film's phasing issues or unnecessary jokes from time to time, I ultimately look at this film and think 2 things: I liked it, I want to watch it again.
Quite a ride. Lots of good, few bits of bad. But overall quite damn entertaining and it has personality. It has a good group of characters we can enjoy and follow around. Sadly held back by the phasing of the film. It would've been quite cool having a slow, sitting in the bar talking for 10 minutes. Discussing their powers, their backgrounds and such.
Movies really need to do that kind of thing more these days. Its nice with some breaks with good dialog. 6 out of 10. Above average. A good movie. With nice replay value. If it hadn't had these phasing problems as well as given us some more time learning about the characters which Del Toro's films did better, I would've rated it 7. But alas, maybe there is hope for a sequel although I doubt it knowing the box office numbers.
Just the same. I appreciate what we did get.
After a 5 year long boycot of Creative Assembly I have decided to give them a chance. This is what I think of 3K.
I'm gonna start out with the good bits because they have listened. They have learned and some aspects of the combat design, campaign modes and hero systems are worth talking about.
- The Good
The inventory system for heroes is a cool touch. I always welcome more variation. The ability to duel is great because its fun and not forced, player control to select our campaign mode is good.
The combat system is overall good. It maintains a balance of MTW2 combat interaction whilst trying to creative occasional matched lock-on kills when appropriate. It is not as good as MTW2, but it is definitely better than Warhammer based on what I have seen.
The music has its moments of beauty and good battle rhytm, but I wont say more because there isn't enough variation at all. the hero designs are quite interesting as well. Some look ordinary, others look fantastic, but graphically they are worse than Warhammer by a long shot. Nevertheless, points for good design work.
Representation of both male and female generals in quite cool ways, with unique inventory. I love this. And you can even gather the weapons or armors of the opponents you defeat. This should definitely evolve with the franchise.
I dont hate this game. And I actually expected I would. So I credit you CA for some great ideas. But you also made some very bad ones and Ill discuss those now.
- The Bad
You may want to get a drink. This is gonna be a long one and if you're a veteran of TW you're gonna get angry.
First of all, morale is too low. Everyone breaks immediately when flanked or hit by cavalry. Archers do too much damage. I dont get why they make melee centered video games when they make ranged units so OP they literally melt everything. This has been a problem since Napoleon Total War but namely Shogun 2, Fall of the Samurai. And why are the tracers so grotesquely large? Am i firing arrows or toilet paper rolls? Because I can't tell the difference.
Oh. Turn them off you say? Well then I can't see anything at all. So that isn't very well balanced. Unlike in MTW2 or shogun 2. Just saying. CA's damage balancing teams are completely clueless on how to do their jobs. And that brings me to a good example of this because Im going to prove it to you!. Next point!
Towers are hitting harder than when God annihilated Babylon. No i am not being hyperbolic. I opened the game files and arrow tower fire is as high in damage as a trebuchet. Hey. I told you you were going to need a drink reading this. Dont blame me if you're feeling sick. Lord knows I was when I saw this. And to anyone who thinks Shield Wall or shield block chance is going to matter. Hahaha. Yeah, no. That tower is a machinegun next equipped with Warhammer 40k Heavy Bolters. And to be fair, they have been for years now because CA dont care. Moving on!
Unit variation is atrocious. Hardly anything is interesting. Most things look the same. It may be historically authentic but this is a video game. Its very very boring. CA's excuse here is that modders will fix that but I'm honestly tired of this. It's super uninspired for 60 bucks.
Units are locked behind unlock requirements in custom battle. This is just... infuriating. I love to playtest units and see what they look like. Can't do that here for the best / elite units. Also the only units that actually dont look like peasants. Whoever at CA thought this was a good idea should be fired. No I dont think thats over the top. Its outright insanely screwed up. Its like selling you a freaking cellphone with lots of features but you dont get to actually use your mailbox, or apps for like 1 week until you used the rest enough.
I imagine looking at you now, dear reader. Seeing you find this staggering and absurd to the extent it sounds like I am lying. Good., I say. I would do too. Because what I am describing is anti-consumer friendly design on steroids and has never been in any total war up until 3K. Which is exactly why I'm mentioning it. This... should NEVER return. Last time I saw this was in EA/ Dice's Battlefront 2. You'd think a developer would know better especially after that backlash.
The graphics are bad. But the steam screenshots do not. How do we explain this? Yes, it was a mystery to me too. Because it is not a Rome 2 situation exactly, although close. The issue here that Creative Assembly screwed up the lighting in the game.
So that means whenever you see battles at night. The game looks absolutely beautiful. The colors, contrasts, correct shine and saturation is on point. But then daylight comes... and we are teleported back to 2007 in terms of graphical fidelity because the color balancing isn't taking the light change into account at all.
No, I dont know why or if this is intended. Only thing I know is I'm running this game max on a strong PC with everything updated and the only time my game looks 90 % similar to the steam pics are during night battles or in afternoon fights with less sun exposure.
Some things worth bringing up as well are the bad interface changes, stupid garrisons and AI not wanting to attack you if you fortify your bases. I am so insanely tired of this. Garrisons break the game because it is boring, and extra fortification means no attacks ever. I get that CA want to make a "smarter AI" but I personally think the AI should never ever ask for peace until its at 1 base left. I spent hours on very hard fortifying my bases and nothing ever happened in my major cities with walls.
Its incredibly boring.
Generals not being able to recruit all units is the most annoying in-game restriction I have ever seen in a TW game. In a game with duels and cool outfits and all these customizable things, you forcing me to use a boring general who's afk on the battlefield is infuriating. Stop telling me how to play and let me do what I want.
And why are there so few generals armors and weapons to go around? Its stupid stuff like this, let alone the tower complaint that is exactly why I dont play Total War games online anymore. Your games are freaking unplayable without mod assistance.
And this is where I will move unto the next part of this massive review. A recent controversy that has lead me to boycot you again.
- The recent controversy.
Not too long ago a chinese modder decided to make portraits of female generals more interesting and uniquely distinguishing to look at. Because this is gaming and the internet he decided to make them extremely attractive. Emphasis on extreme. I'm using that word because I dont want to risk this review not being approved. This is news to noone. We've seen it in all games. Just part of the internet. People enjoy making all sorts of funny mods.
But where this player creation becomes a controversy is when CA decided to freak out over this because of a single employee's opinion. They made this opinion their policy and I dont really care too much about that. What I care about is how they began a witch-hunt and have officially censored the modder in question. Ordering him to remove his mods or change them through Steam.
Bear in mind, dear reader. This is a game where you can literally dismember men, women and animals. Arms, legs, heads, etc. I just want everyone to keep this in mind when being presented with this information that CA went full 12th century Crusade over a female general being made look more revealing in a 2D portrait alone.
No matter your opinion on that, what I wish to emphasize is the final outcome. Not the company's policy. CA is within their right to dislike what they want. But I am strongly opposed to them censoring harmless community creations.
I do not like them suddenly trying to boss us around. We have been keeping their game alive for years because 90 % of the time when CA releases a game its broken and unplayable. For them to now attack us and play the morality game is the last straw for me personally.
If you're going to allow us to mod, then you can't just begin complaining about us modding afterwards, let alone censoring us and actually cracking down on the guys steam account so hard he can't upload for a while.
Its absolutely childish and outrageous. This is a paying customer who spend his hard earned money to buy your product and you're punishing him and censoring him after you allowed him to be creative.
Disgust... is not a strong enough word.
3K is a very large, mixed bag. And there are things I didn't talk about because they didn't overly affect me to the same extent the things I mentioned did. There are things I like, things I love, things I hate and revile.
But I'll simply end this colossal review in this way here. Modders have fixed 90 % of the things I complained about. That is important to highlight.
But I am personally going to rate this game a 4 out of 10 just the same because the baseline is bad. The game is lacking, it is very backwards and has atrocious ideas that weren't thought through properly. For ever 2 steps forward, it takes 3 steps backwards. And that is my golden rule by thumb when it comes to dealing with this developer.
Because its always the same. Everytime. I'm not going to let the controversy affect my rating however. if it did I'd rate it an outright 1 out of 10. But I'm not going to do that.
3K is a 4 / out 10. Below average. A good game held back by too many bad ideas and stupid problems. With mods its easily a 7-8 depending on your point of view.
But as for me personally, I am just done. I have always loved modding. I've made a lot for Shogun 2 myself. Loved exploring my ideas, potential concepts with both men and women alike. Loved combining things and going in crazy directions to be original and fresh when adding to our great community.
If CA is gonna begin dictating and censoring us now, then I have officially had enough. You haven't learned a thing from Rome 2's era. And about Rome 2. Sieges are still laggy to boot. Its ridiculous.
And on that note:" 2 steps forwards, 3 steps backwards" GG, CA.
Annabelle Comes Home (2019)
Absurd, insulting and ridiculous to Conjuring continuity.
The film starts out well but then it just throws everything we've established for years out the window in the name ofwhat? Girlpower flick? Comedy? Bathos and ridiculing of the guy character throughout the film who's largely only comedic relief. IN A HORROR MOVIE?! ... What?! Why??! This is dumb.
Film tries to be funny when it shouldn't, we got a 9-10 year old girl fighting the super evil bad guys who've given her parents a run through HELL for years. Portrayals of such evil and monstrous tales that we still remember vividly. But who cares. Lets just portray the stuff we're used to seeing and fearing and remove all sense of dread ... COMPLETELY. Anyone can fight a demon now! Who needs faith, or vatican permission or experience of bibles. 1 little cross and you're all good.
Are you kidding me?
How is this getting 8-9-10 ratings? Are you actually serious? People rating this higher than the actual James Wan Conjuring films, masterpieces and genuinely scary I might add, clearly dont understand horror at all.
This film is the worst of the Annabelle films, because it tries to be funny instead of being creepy and ultimatley makes a mockery of established Conjuring lore.
This is supposed to be a "supposedly" real inspired tales made cinema. This has made these films notorious when imagining, when analysing and even watching because of the background factor telling you " The Warrens claim this was real"
And here we are, spitting on the whole franchise with this stupid bathos spin-off.
Please be the last movie. Its such low energy and insulting to the fantastic works of James Wan.
I watched this with low expectations, knowing certain cast members were here I felt like there was hope. But boy...was I wrong.
Interesting concept ruined by bland character and way too much flashback sequencing.
- Movie summarized:
- Explanation / analysis
This is a particular problem because it spends so much time establishing the characters past over...and over, that it ends up taking away from the actual present. Rushing through what could've been interesting action minus 1 scene.
The best actors in the film feel underused and ultimately we're just stuck with this... bland "protagonist" if you can call her that.
Very emotionaless, pale and meh. And I get that its intended, I just find it incredible boring to look at.
And thats it. If you're into these kinds of films, more power to you .I personally find it insulting that people are comparing this so blatantly to Nikita who was infinitely more interesting. I see the Salt plot, I see the Red Sparrow training. I see the total lack of emotion and dreary feel from both.
But thats all I see. And it lowers what would've been a 6 out of 10 film to 5 in my book. Because I genuinely couldn't even be bothered to finish it, due to how bored I was. I felt like I was wasting time.
The most criminal part of the film is how it starts. It throws everything at you. Right in your face and then... flashback. After flashback. And overly long sequences of telling you everything that lead up to this moment except its boring.
- Final thoughts
I like Luc Besson as a director but christ is this one of his weaker works.
5 out of 10. Go watch Salt instead. Angelina actually has charm and comes across as convincing in her portrayal as a soviet agent. She has heart, Anna here feels like a rushed version of multiple characters without much soul.
And to anyone comparing her to John Wick... Shame on you.
Child's Play (2019)
If it wasn't called Child's Play I would've rated it higher.
A mixed bag but in a way that leaves you thinking " Great concept, wrong franchise"
- The Good
The beginning of the film is strong. Good build-up & establishment as to why Chucky is crazy, although I should say "malfunctioning"
The story is objectively good. I enjoy how it reminds me of an 80's robo-horror flick I can't remember at this time.
But this is where the praise ends.
- The Bad
But not in the same movie. It simply does not work. Sure, you can call it a reimagining but I dont buy it because we shouldn't go about altering established franchises that way. It's tearing the Chucky doll's legacy through the mud of rather textbook horror as well. The kills aren't good. The camera cuts away a lot, the characters are at times just annoying or irrelevant or we dont really entirely get why they had to die, even. Yes, it's actually that confusing with the cops mother dying.
The list goes on but I'd rather get to my final remarks because thats really all that matters in this review.
Same with Chucky. The 2 great concepts here are as Tay, freedom to learn and accomodate culture and opinion. Whilst also being susceptible to human error, tampering, removal of X restriction and so on. The idea is really great and should be explored more. Because we do live in an age where AI is among us and the possibility for disaster are very very real. Prime example already mentioned.
But it does not work... within a Child's Play movie. At all. Some people may argue so and welcome a re-imagining of it but I say its way too far. Child's play was dark, magical, borderline demonic and a horror founded in mysticism. Let alone the horror of imagining a serial killer inside your toy, watching you. That was the whole point and why Chucky to this day is TERRIFYING as a villain. Because you would never expect the doll sitting behind you right now would be watching you and planning on gutting you alive in your sleep. And it should've stayed that way. Because as terrifying as a bad AI can be, a human being with murderous tendencies, a malevolent, manipulative mind and inability to literally die... is worse.
- Final Thoughts
But as a Child's Play film it's a 4 in my book. Its below average. I prefer all the other films to it, and I wont be re-watching this one because I simply dont have any interest in watching a robot malfunction. Mark Hamill is great. But he can't be charismatic when portraying a robot. And that is the ultimate and final flaw in this movie.
Chucky... is lifeless. he's uncharismatic, he's uninteresting outside of tech aspects and ultimately you can kill him incredibly easily. You can even overpower him without issue unlike real Chucky who's straight up nuts and wild.
"sigh" 4 out of 10. Missed opportunity for something else. And an objectively bad portrayal of a Child's Play movie because it disregards and re-invents what should not be re-invented at all.
The point of a remake is to make it better. This film only hurts the franchise and ultimately the great concepts it explores within that should've been their very own thing.
Dark Phoenix (2019)
Weird. Pros and cons... but overall its just... weird.
Mixed bag with some cool fight scenes, conclusions, annoying dialog, weird sense of catharsis and rather screwed up continuity.
- Controversial factors
So with the history of these films taken into account. Why they'd include this specific line in the script doesn't feel like it makes any sense and was presumably solely there to press certain buttons for certain individuals or to create a sense of humorous remark. Can't say it came across that way for me however. Once again, context is important. All theory of course, but from an analytical perspective and objective lense this film doesn't do such a line any favours. It just turns people off the film, makes you confused because it lacks logical consistency which is a shame because the film is not bad.
Mixed bag overall. Its a great action ride, with a few slow moments but where as some criticise them I personally dont mind that. I always favour story over mega action. The issue here is that the build up and conclusions... none of it comes across as particularly impactful. Maybe its just me as a movie goer and lack of interestin this particular version of X men. 6 out of 10. Above average fun action flick if you aren't turned off by a specific remark. I rolled my eyes at it and kept watching and it was alright. Nothing mindblowing.
- Final thoughts
But objective analysis aside... I find it a real shame that this film is suffering from one grand issue. And that is that its not particularly original in the slightest. They ultimately end up telling the story of X Men: The last Stand all over again with some differences. Furthermore, I may be ignorant here but we have seen the 2 X men versions cross and this movie here has pretty much annihilated the continuity of that. Jean's gone... went Phoenix like 10 or 15 years ahead of Last Stand. Raven's dead too...
And it just ends this franchise (for the time being) in this weird state where it wanted to stop, continuity is a mess and its just all over now with a final shot of Jean flying in the sky as a phoenix from afar.
... What?? Alas, just some final notes that ultimately made the film feel rather hollow and unsatisfactory. If you wanna be entertained by lots of action then you'll enjoy it. If you expect a compelling X Men story then you wont find anything you haven't seen before here.
Its all over now and thats...that. Not bad, not great, just okay. Which for some people will be a crime in itself.
For me personally, I stopped caring about X men to any large extent since the original films were done.
Goblin Slayer (2018)
10 out of 10. And I'll explain exactly why. This show has a strong spine and the message is so damn admirable.
This show does NOT stray from being shocking. But make no mistake, it isn't done for the reason of just being shocking. Something certain reviewers here would actually realize if they watched more than a single episode.
Aside from the fact that this anime is super fun, cool, epic, cute, kickass and so much more I want to touch on the specific thing being how it deals with making monsters feel like actual monsters and the toll it has on the heroes.
So many complain about it but utterly fail to understand the point and its a damn shame because after just seeing episode 7-8 you get such an incredible character and explanation to just how deep this actually is.
How even the most legendary, prestigious of heroes have their demons. How no matter how fierce, outstanding and epic ones accomplishments have been or foes proven to be, trauma... can linger.
And Goblin Slayer higlights this fact, both show and character himself, comments on this in such a fantastic way that underlines how this theme is very much intended for narrative reasons, not for visual shock. It magnifies how some fights are internal, how we must deal with them ourselves and grow stronger. Find our own salvation,
How sometimes we must accept our past to harden and find purpose and embrace who we are, letting us drive us towards a better direction, knowing the things we know, having seen the world in a different light. The past shapes us but we can define how.
And how even the mightiest of heroes have their demons... and while Goblin Slayer can, noble as he is, defend this incredible woman and legendary hero who shares her horrific tale of assault, promising he will guard her and always be there to slay the demons that haunt her, since for her the trauma is too much, the message is still underlined with the express clarity that she is not alone,and he himself has demons as well, but he accepts them, uses it to make him stronger. Making him what he is.
The Goblin Slayer. A man forged into a weapon. An absolutely amazing mix of both 2 dimensional character behavior on his outer shell with an ever fascinating 3rd dimension inside that emphasizes the weight of this shows messaging. It is so damn heroic and inspirational, whilst at the same time utter naked truth about topics that haunt us, but by not straying from this we all develop.
All of which are forms of trauma that people deal with. Both in real life and in the anime. And I am so incredible proud of these creators for having the courage to bring this up, to talk about it, presenting such an incredibly deep dimension of story to our amazing heroes.
Not just how vulnerable they actually are, by no means invulnerable, but furthermore the fact that they have a psyché, and it is not remotely without its merits... or weaknesses that everyone, including us the viewers must figure out how to deal with.
It is such an incredibly good show for touching on so many themes. Controversial to some, profoundly interesting and philosophically, let alone psychologically vital to me personally.
I can't wait for more Goblin Slayer. Thank you to all who's involved with this. What an absolute masterpiece. Thank you for not holding back and so intellectually using these themes to bring forth such an empathetic, and relatable narrative.
Absolutely earned a 10 out of 10 in my book.
The fun thing about the messaging here is how the show directly touches upon the core complaints being the rough themes. Demonstrably proving just how human this story is. How incredibly bold the writers were. I hope more will come to realize this.
Thank you, creators. What an absolutely great anime and contribution to both art and philosophy.
Season 4 is the strongest lucifer has ever been. Please make Season 5.
Its incredible how much they listened and repaired the show.
As a mega fan for years I can attest to its issues with weak episodes, filler stuff and overly long amounts of time to reach certain conclusions but this 10 episode season packs such a powerful punch.
More demon stuff
More demons hanging around
Eve dropping by
Another angel swinging by
Lucifer using his powers far more than ever. They were not holding back at all which is phenomenal because its what we've wanted for so long and what kept people to ditch the series because it turned into a cop drama instead of a fantastical epic. Which it has offiically fixed.
I genuinely find it hard to nitpick at season 4. Again, mega fan, bias etc. So I'll just state the obvious fan complaints although I get the reasons why they didn't do it.
More episodes would've been nice. I get why though, concise story telling. More impact. And it certainly was but just the same. We all want more. Hoping for season 5.
And of course. I really hoped we'd get a Lilith appearance. Love how they include all of the great mythological figures.
And thats largely it. I genuinely cannot think of anything that bothered me during this season unlike the others.
I love how they continue fleshing out character arcs and keep making things interesting.
I hope Netflix gives us a season 5. This show is stronger than it has ever been because of the minimalistic change to its narrative and thereby impact all around. Ellis himself even stated so in an interview how he approves of this new approach because he gets the criticism.
Crossing fingers for more. It would be a shame if it ended now nowing the show has been completely repaired and more enticing than ever. That being said if it does end, the ending we got is good. Bitter-sweet but good and fitting.
That said, I certainly hope it's not the end.
Mortal Kombat 11 (2019)
MK11 = Broken, MTX-packed game with dumbed down customization
Mega shortened review.
Usual good combat stuff
Crypts have a good concept on paper.
I really like that we play and progress unlocking new skins
More customization the better.
Broken grind unlocking the costumes
A skin that you unlock in game is on the store anyway -_- Really NR?
Traditional attractive outfits for female characters have been removed and reworked. The male fighters got everything and more so NR is just dumbing down the game and removing variation in custome design.
Developer comments on criticism haven't helped either. Calling us non-fans, no matter if I own almost all MK games. So thats great.
Rage-quit issues. This is an old one but its still annoying. Stop ending the match if a player leaves. Just let the fighter remain in game without player control. Its annoying to have matches end sporadically because of quitters. Come on, NR. We complained about this in For Honor with its atrocious P2P connectivity.
Summary: More cons than pros. Real shame because I love MK but the developer is changing and becoming more hostile towards its fans. The removal of traditional outfits for the women fighters especially sucks as a mega fan. Hurting continuity in game design as well as film creative direction is something I never like seeing.
Furthermore. Why not just have both? I mean we play to unlock new skins. So removing variation and additional customization just hurts the games replay value.
"sigh" Alas. 3 out of 10. Very underwhelming game with too many issues surrounding it.
NR, please stop releasing your games in broken conditions, stop pushing bad MTX into your game and quit removing costumes for female fighters as well as male if you suddenly begin doing that. Add to the game. Stop taking away from it.
If Johnny Cage isn't able to get his iconic shirt off skin in the next MK game I dont know if I'll either be more mad or disappointed.
Please do better. Sincerely an MK & fighter fan for decades.
Pet Sematary (2019)
If you're gonna remake it, at least put in the effort. Jesus, Hollywood...
So I hate this. Just gonna get that straight.
I went in objective, even as a mega fan of the original but I tried to admire and like it for its own merits.
Problem is... the movie barely freaking has any original merits at all to enjoy.
60 % of this film feels rushed. Everything that happens in the original, largely happens here BUT... it happens faster, without the atmosphere, and without fleshed out BELIEVABLE dialog with dark, tense music that tries to " NOT SCARE YOU".... but get under your skin.
This is where I'll go off on a mini-rant about the video game franchise called F.E.A.R and how what happened to that franchise is a prime example of how NOT to bloody do horror. Although hollywood wont listen and I'm wasting my time trying to tell 'em but hey, it'll be therapeutic.
F.E.A.R was a franchise built with 1 core concept from start to finish. It wasn't horror, it wasn't blood, gore, dramatic story telling or emphasis on trauma or heroism.
It was 1 thing. "The idea... of getting under your skin"
And thats why F.E.A.R 1 was such an amazing experience and absolutely legendary from the perspective of true horror. Because it never failed to creep you out with its visuals, its audio, its lore and the thought of "something is watching me... something is out there, something isn't right, oh my god this is not a nice atmosphere"
Pet Sematary, the original had many of the same aspects by making us of great dialog, superb line delivery, EMPHASIS ON PATIENCE... which helps improve the flow of dialog, making it more emotional, believable and impactful to the viewer. In terms of cinematography this is what we call "The build-up" and we felt trauma, tension, sadness, sense of horrifying emotions running rampant throughout a broken family that came across as extremely relatable.
When Gage died in the original, we heard screams, we saw blood, we saw a bloody shoe moving in slow motion as we heard screams of terror that'll rattle your very soul... it was horrifying to this very day.
When Gage was brought back by his dad later on, we got a sweet scene with emotional, sad music playing as the father spent around a minute, sitting in the grave, holding his dead boy... holding him tight, missing him, and us the audience can feel it. We almost, if not definatively shed a tear because this is horrible to behold and its shot so well in terms of cinematography.
The director and screenplay writers here knew exactly what to emphasize. Trauma, loss, relatability, terror, fear, tension, creepiness with a touch of desperation that we can all understand because losing our loved ones is the most terrible experience we will have in our lives.
We had a few, but meaningful scenes with Pascow who was much more prevalent and likable in the original too. Bit of fun, sure but it worked out fine because it gave us that caspar the friendly ghost sense in the middle of a truly terrible story. Here, however he's barely in it. Alike everything else its just rush, rush rush !!! Jesus... why ?!
What I think happened here is that the people who made this didn't even try to compete with the original and figured that they either couldn't or didn't bother fleshing out the story and characters from a TRULY emotional perspective so that we the audience can care and empathise with our protagonists because they figured it would be better to give time to silly jumpscares, worn down, not at all creepy sister and of course, more attacks and stuff near the end.
Its not scary. Its not creepy. Its not at all effective means of horror. Because the dead... dont feel dead. They talk, they giggle, they move around quickly and apparently teleport 200 freaking yards inside of peoples houses because plot !
Yes that actually happens. Lithgow (who did a great job btw) sees Ellie is alive, runs back to his house. after freaking 60 seconds of doing this he hears her upstairs. And tada... she's there! Zzzzzzz its so god damn boring. They didn't at all take the time to make her going there scary or creepy. Just her hiding and then jumpscare! They made a small change with him kicking the bed unlike the original but whats the bloody point when he dies the same way anyway !... Jesus christ, modern hollywood. Pathetic...
Once again. They try new things but dont at all try to do anything interesting with it. We barely see the burial grounds, we dont get any large shots of it at all. The Wendigo never appears either. Our dead mother and daughter die but dont at all look bloody or gory or such.
The daughter was hit by a colossal god damn truck. Mashed! Barely any damage... give me a break. Again, something to add tension to how we react to her because she gets a lot of screentime near the end. Lots of talking, lots of threats and trying to be evil but it doesn't at all work. It feels like a psycho kid that wants to murder its parents. NOT a zombie that is on a killing rampage.
Wanna know why, Hollywood? Its because you didn't at all try to build it up using proper music, or proper visual design. Let alone watching how she moves, what she does. Lots of the time she just vanishes off camera, goes all over the place and thats not creepy.
They even have a scene where the dead cat goes to the basement right. Husband goes down, sees a dark doorway. I'm like " Okay... something new here. Lets see. Is there something dead or unholy under the house? Alike Amityville Horror?"
Nope. Of course not! Just a weird flashback thing of Pascow appearing for 4 freaking seconds telling him his life is about to go sideways. The end. He then gets knocked back outta the dark doorway and... thats it. We dont go further, we dont look inside if theres anything else there.
NOTHING...at all is done with this. Its so incredibly poorly done. In the original we had Pascow appear at ideal times, depending on who he spoke to and what he wanted to pass on as a message. He even became this friend character we cared for and he cared for our main protagonist too.
When his wife dies in the original and he carries her back to the burial grounds, Pascow appears, sad music plays and we know its terrible. We know its dreadful. He killed his own kid, it was horrible to behold how the father was crying inside and out, watching himself kill his child, necessarily because of the evil, only to give up on facts, and give into desperation, carrying his dead beloved back to try again... to no avail.
Pascow appears, screaming:" No, Lewis! ...No !! Nooo!!!"
Impactful, meaningful, emotional, creepy and traumatic imagery. Superb usage of music and cinematography.
What do we get here? Nothing. He runs up, daughter tries to be edgy and stabs the mother. Dad runs up, gets knocked over the head and wakes up only to run to the dark buriaul grounds which look like a tiny, little scene.
This angers me really badly actually. We dont get 1 single freaking full shot of the burial grounds to get an idea of the surroundings and setting. Its just black... dark, shadowy, swamp like BLEH.... Jesus christ. When will you get it through your head, Hollywood. How are we supposed to be afraid of things when we cant see JACK!
I want to emphasize that at no point in this movie, except for the daughter, do we ever truly care about anyone in this film. And its because its rushed. Its too fast, they are skipping too much of the important bits from the original. Small chats, talks about the burial grounds.
I'm trying really hard not to get extremely angry writing this next part... But they actually even included a freaking "google " search of the freaking local legends. Watching that was teeth grinding levels of " Are...you... actually serious?"
You got a guy that's lived across the house from you his ENTIRE life. In the original we got a story about his dog which they thankfully included, although quickly too and without flashbacks because again. Effort, ehh, Hollywood?
But furthermore when the son died, they sat down, had a chat and the old man told a story about how a person had been brought back before. We got flashback tales about a terrible, twisted, creepy as hell guy that terroriized people and was eventually burned alive.
Damn creepy. Excellent work on music and storytelling as well as acting.
Here of course we get jack... because of course. Nah. Lets just skip the boring old guy and google stuff because modern age, ehh ?! God I should've gotten drunk before writing this. Boiling these things down are making me far angrier than I thought.
As I said to begin with. I'm a mega fan of Stephen King and the original movie. It had heart, soul, emphasis on telling a very sad, very touching story that went terribly, terribly wrong... and built on that established concept with getting under our skin levels of darkness.
Its an absolute horror masterpiece.
THIS HERE HOWEVER... is a blatant, lazy, low effort piece of crap that copies the bare concepts of the original but doens't at all bother to flesh them out the same way.
I am... MINDBLOWN by the fact that they actually thought this film could work this way. I mean sure, your averave pop-corn munching dude will watch this and be scared but christ... if you think a fan of true horror, let alone just the original movie will respect or like this you got another thing coming, Hollywood.
If you're gonna remake a movie, then at least bloody TRY. 3 / 10. Tasteless, low effort, lazy crap. Watch the original, people.
The Russian Bride (2019)
Fack its good!! Can I say that? Idk if I can but DAMN... its so good.
If I gotta repost this review without that title then so be it. I'm repeating those words non stop after seeing this. I can't help myself :D
God damn its good.
This film is not at all what I expected. I knew it was horror, I knew it was good ol' Corbin Bernsen and a different take with a russian mail order bride. But holy...hell how it became something far more than what I thought I had figured out .
I wont go into too deep spoilers because that would ruin the point of watching the film, aside from it being a damn good, surprising time.
What the movie gets right, earning a high 9 on my scale is that its not holding back with some good gore, its not afraid to be nasty and cruel to characters we're supposed to care for a lot. There ain't no handholding going on here. This story is BRUTAL and it downright takes domestic abuse to the next level, which is something that is prevalent in our main female leads life before meeting Corbin.
The american dream... gone very very very bad and its glorious in its portrayal.
The thing I love the most isn't the great acting, corbin being ever entertaining or Oksana's marvelous portrayal of a woman giving her ALL to survive and save her daughter. All of this is fantastic...but its not what truly gets me.
Its the fact that the film itself never stops trying to surprise you and enjoys making you guess, and guess wrong. In so many horror films these das we got the generic formula of " Whatever happens, our lead will be okay and we'll get a happy ending" but in this film I had myself second guessing myself over...and over. Are things REALLY... gonna be okay here?
Because they are not holding back. The twisted nature, the horrible acts, the discoveries, the plot flips and much more keeps going deeper and deeper till you realize just how deep the rabbit hole actually is. And its not something you will guess straight from the bat. Which I ADORE!
Time and time again we get introduced to moments of " Okay this is game over now. Okay now its over. She can't get over that. Jesus he's evil. This is unthinkably cruel!" And LOVE IT because of the way it ends. The film knows how to build itself up towards a grand finale. The film KNOWS... what we all want, but also what we're tired of seeing, or getting too fast. You dont want a tasty dessert after a mediocre meal.
GOD NO. YOu want a big, damn tasty meal and once you're satisfied THEN you wanna give into your gluttonous desires and feast on an overkill dessert because screw it! Lets go crazy.
And the film knows this very well. It knows it has to be more than a generic survival horror flick with a twisted villain because we've seen that before.
And by god... does it succeed in being so much more because of it.
And Mr Director... that Scarface reference at the end... "Italian Chef Kiss" LAVARO FANTASTICO!
Genius and just at the right time.
I wont say more because I just dont want to spoil it to my readers.
PEOPLE! WATCH THIS FILM! I dont care if you pay for it or watch it online for free. WATCH IT! Its worth your time if you enjoy horror survival stuff with a lot of twists.
9 out of 10. Reason for not giving it a full blown 10 is because that the film has 1 sidesplot about ghosts which it doesn't do too much with and I feel like it could've been a bit more prevalent.
Dont get me wrong, it definitely serves its purpose and the film works because of it, but its very tiny and it comes across as confusing at some point as well because of Corbin's reaction to it.
One of the things that once again makes us guess... and surprises us :)
But yes. Absolutely fantastic horror film in my personal opinion. I love it and I'm so happy I randomly came across it.
Thank you to everyone involved making this. A true horror gem... and one I've come to greatly appreciate in this age of ever predictable, boring, jumpscare packed horror.
Not here, ladies and gentlemen. This... is damn good.
Mass Effect died for this. Was it worth it ? (April Update at the end)
No. And I'll explain why whilst containing my frustration with this developers apparent downfall no matter their claims that they'll be okay.
-The Good: Love the mechs. Love the concept. I appreciate all the game could've been. Fantastic looking combat and mobility. The premise of combining multiplayer and singleplayer aspects whilst containing a bioware style soul is a very fascinating idea. But...
Thats unfortunately only a dream.
-The Bad: Everything... else. And I'm not gonna bother crediting graphics btw because all games these days from Tripple A devs look good so who freaking cares anymore.... Gameplay > Graphics.
Anthem does not have the soul we were promised from a classic Bioware singleplayer RPG. Its generic, boring, lifeless. Bioware / EA LIED about how much you could do in the game as well. Head right on back and listen to the developer interviews on youtube. Meaningful decisions? Nope. Intereactive gameplay with friends? Nope. NPC's are as baseline as it gets and if you play with friends in this game wont wont progress the same way you do.
The main hub is dead and bland. You have zero impact on the story. You have zero impact on any characters. There is zero interesting RPG elements to explore such as dialog, branching paths, relationships, etc. We knew about the relationships ahead of time sure but does that make it any better? No. Its a dumb move and when the rest of the game is so lacking it just stings even more.
It's so unbelivably baseline that I can barely believe its a Bioware game. This is a game that ME Andromeda got canned for. Mid development of Andromeda many devs were pulled off that game in favour of Anthem. And while I pushed through Andromeda and loved it after patches and mods, (mega fan) I am absolutely disgusted with Anthem.
I'm infuriated that the game that got so much trouble, horrible release, lacking story, troubled writing and so much more was sacrificed in favour of a game that now launches in an even worse and downgraded state. I still recall the articles about how Bioware doubles down on Anthem.
What? How? The game has less than Andromeda had. It has LESS than Fallout 76 has. How is that even possible?
Anthem is the most basic looter shooter you can imagine. Its not an RPG either for reasons I've already explained. The game doesn't even have a stats menu for christs sake. What game about loot, stats, percentage managing doesn't have a stat menu...? Exactly. NONE. Because thats unthinkably bad to not let your player understand how much of X value you have and how to get more.
Anthem offers you jack other than 4 Javlin suits, lots of paint jobs, bare gun variety, zero cool loot on release.
Bioware is dead in my book until they release something that lives up to their reputation. I didn't believe that after ME 3. I didn't believe that after Inquisition. I DIDN'T believe that after Andromeda. Because I'm a bloody mega fan ever since Dragon Age Origins & Kotor.
My best childhood gaming memories come from Kotor Jedi training areas with this music that makes me nostalgic and emotional to this day.
And as much as I want to hope... to dream that Bioware that made this is still around its just not true. A game developer is first and foremost its individual men and women that work to make the product grand and memorable. If these fine men and women that dedicate their time, blood, sweat and tears. Hell, even sharing their very soul with this work of art... if these people leave the company, the company suffers for it.
We've heard time and time again for developer leave Bioware. Casey Hudson left. During Anthem's development of last year we heard the lead writer Drew also quit. Sure we were promised all was okay. But now that the game is released does that promise hold any value? Seeing how baseline and empty the story and world feels I'd argue "no"
I'm sad andI'm angry, by merely imagining that this might be Bioware's last big game. To think that we'll never see Dragon Age again... or Mass Effect since thats on ice now which is just adding insult to injury since they could've done everything in their power to prevent that from happening. EA literally killed their own game by moving devs mid development, and now they are doing it again with Anthem. ( Update, they were in pre-production for 6 years out of 7. Game was pieced together in just over 1 year and the E3 trailer was 100 % fake. None of it existed)
Its such a repulsing thought that I can't even fathom how a gaming world without Bioware might be as a mega fan of their games and themselves as a developer. (Old Bioware anyway) Maybe theyll come back strong and redeem themselves with Dragon Age 4!
But I'm not holding my breath, nor do I even expect that to happen anymore after seeing the developer, renown for its amazing RPG mechanics and incomparable stories, come up with a game like Anthem which's design decisions are the very antithesis of what what a Bioware game truly is.
The game is boring. Its generic. You run, you jump, you shoot, have a bit of fun only you dont even get good rewards for any of it.
There's no interesting story here. The cinematics are full of lies and PR. Huge grand battle which we dont ever come close to see an in-game version of. Walking mega mechs except they dont ever move in the actual game. And dont even get me started on the graphical downgrade. I mean good god the game doesn't have do god rays right, let alone simple sunshine which we have modded in to help improve games like skyrim. A game thats 8 years old.
And as if these things weren't meh enough then you better get ready. Because thisis to be followed up by boring loot, minimal variation, huge lack of meaningful stat upgrades + equip bonuses to guns. Not to mention horrible loading screens. And ofc... the thing good game needs that is about collecting loot.
A character menu of which to show inventory and equipment slots to allow the player to outfit him/herself with new gear.
Except thats not here either as such. You get loot and then head back to base through what feeels like a lifetime of loading screens, equip your stuff only to realize not much happened because the loot is very unoptimized to the extent Legendaries dont even blow you away as they should. We all remember Jarrah's Wrath. Heh. The representation of the gun in that E3 trailer isn't even how you get the stuff in the actual game. It was pure PR and lies.
So you equip your stuff, and then proceed to get back out in the world but first you gotta deal with a few more loading screens of course because Anthem needs to remind you of the fatal error you made buying this game by forcing you to get so mad you'll end up on the brink of smashing your keyboard due to this horrid way of waiting... and waiting. Which you'll do more of almost than playing the actual bloody game.
I hate writing this. Hate writing this massive negative review because I've never given up hope on this developer before. But after this I genuinely feel like I'm spent. Inquisition has issues but I reckoned I'd just play witcher 3 instead and let Bioware learn from that. I played Andromeda which I loved and hoped that Bioware would learn from the game, let alone EA and then do better next time since the ME fans are some of the most passionate fans in gaming.
3 out of 10.
Bioware... get a grip and if its not you but EA sabotaging you, then I'm genuinely sorry. Because it took Viceral LESS bad game design & lower sales to get sacked.
ME + Andromeda got iced for this, no matter promising DLC for this game.
Yet Andromeda was better. And while I love that game, that's an insane statement to make because of all the troubles ew heard about. All the devs pulled off the project and unto Anthem mid development of Andromeda which arguably sealed its fate and still you managed to come up with the most bare-boned trend hunting looter shooter which outright baffled people since we didn't think there would be more to do in games like Fallout 7s, over a longer period of time.
Dear Bioware. We know that you can do better because your track record is amazing. So please do, because this game's features and core emphasis is not why you have been such a beloved developer for years.
And thats my review. Hopefully fit for submission this time, because I dont know how much more tame I can be in my wording of how I feel towards this game.
Last time I did this was with Viceral. I was one of the guys pushing for Dead Space 3. We sent letters to EA, sent letters to the Viceral too and we hoped they'd listen. Let Viceral try again. Hell we even got a reply if memory serves from one of the marketing guys that spoke about how we shouldn't give up. Push through and let them know there's a demand. But we all know how that turned out.
Update: So thanks to Kotaku we finally know what really happened. The game spent almost half a decade in pre-prodution, with people waiting over a year to proceed with dev stuff because leads didn't know jack, GROTESQUELY incompetent management at Bioware (not just EA) and horrific crunch time after 6 years of doing CONCEPTS till Deadline was knocking on the door. "sigh"
Frostbyte engine was horrible to work with, EA delegated support teams unto Fifa, Bioware staff quit mid development, the game underwent sporadic "back and forth" which explains poor level design for flying gameplay.
Stress caused people to quit, cry at work, break down mentally and take months off. What the F... is wrong with you management people at Bioware? I hope you get sued or fired for creating a workplace like this.
A game dev... is its developers. And many of the old guard have quit. Thus Bioware is no longer Bioware. Its a toxic, disorganised mess of a studio with the name of a Legend.
But that Legend is firmly dead to me after hearing this. Prove me wrong, Bioware... I dare you because I love ME and Dragon Age.
But personally, I think this is the end of the line with this incompetent leadership.
Even Lambs Have Teeth (2015)
These kinds of films boil down to 1 single question: Is the revenge good and satisfying? And the answer is...
It bloody well is.
Its not an original flick by any means BUT... it sure doesn't hold back on its creative sense of Eye for an Eye logic.
I liked it. I didn't expect much other than a solid revenge flick. And this one delivered on that and then some.
Well worth a watch if you enjoy revenge flicks. The bad guys get whats coming for em as per good ol' karma.
Indescribably incredible. I feel like a kid again, watching Star Wars, heart in my throat, emotional and mindblown.
Spoiler free review because this is free online and you should watch it yourself, not get told how good it is. You owe that to yourself.
It's rare that you can say a film actually lives up to its hype. But it's FAR less seldom that you can say it actually surpassed the hype. This film did. The acting is spot on. The attention to detail and incredible writing radiates an aura of such profound understanding of Star Wars and these characters portrayed.
True, heartfelt, pure and devoted LOVE... went into this and you can feel it. Just as you feel the impact of seeing Anakin and Padme together in a way i wont spoil but in a way we've only read about and imagined.
I was on the edge of my seat the entire film. My heart jumped to my throat and I could barely comprehend what I was looking at after feeling so disappointed and angry for 3 years with the official films.
This... this masterpiece. This absolutely pure work of art dedicated to just how much us fans ADORE this universe is a tried and true breath of life into Star Wars more so than most fan films I've loved and enjoyed throughout the years.
This one swept my legs away under me and gave me a christmas gift beyond what I ever thought I could wish for and get SUCH a sense of satisfaction.
I'm a 27 year old guy. Fan of Star Wars for decades and I'm feeling like I'm an 8 year old kid, dressing up, fencing in the garden, enjoying the absolutely wonderful universe that is Star Wars. The magical sensation. The beautiful music. The story is so damn good and its nothing short of breathtaking visually, not just due to its very apparent high quality in terms of visuals and effects let alone the actors AMAZING portrayal of Vader behaving perfectly, or the emperor being ever wicked and even a MINDBLOWINGLY cool scene with a bunch of clone troppers which I wont spoil because you NEED to see this for yourself.
The scene with Anakin and Padme is more profound and impactful than I remotely thought it would be as a mega fan. Knowing the books and knowing about the many times Vader has sought a way to get Padme back, seen her in visions. I kept repeating to myself time and time again... " Oh my god... whilst feelings overwhelming me in a way I've not felt for years"
Seeing what happens in this film just... hit me right in the feels. And it's just so good. So pure and well executed. With a perfect understanding and incredible respect of the lore. Amazing kudos to the writer for all of this, as well to every single person involved in making it into a real film. You people are incredible and I love you. Every single one of you.
Go to his channel. Star Wars Theory and watch the film for free. Because you will not be disappointed. They will not disappoint you.
Thank you, for giving us the best Star Wars film since the Clone Wars series. Thank you for giving us a product made from Love, Honor, Integrity and Die-Hard Selfless Fandom.
You are all incredible. Thank you for giving us all a Christmas present that blew us away and a Star Wars movie that made everyone come together.
My only criticism of this film is that it is too short. Hah! But that's only a good sign and for that reason it earns a flawless 10 out of 10. Well earned because of all the heart, dedication, love and profound care put into every single detail of this entire movie.
In the words of Darth Vader himself... "Most impressive"
The Haunting of Hill House (2018)
Trauma, terror, horror and emotion. If you accept the adaptation its damn good. But if you expect the original by Jackson, tread lightly near the end. .
TL:DR I love 99 % of what this show offers except its ending due to it being a different version of jackson's novel. Its not that I'm a purist, its that I find the change of villain near the end to be a very bad decision. Other than that, fantastic show. Well worth your time. Sets the standard for what horror should be like these days. A definitive breath of fresh air.
Story, cinematography, acting, visual design, music and attention to detail = 10 out of 10 right off the bat.
Its a very good series. Every episode is unique and relevant to story as well as individual character progress. A LOT is being told in a short and concise way that never feels neglected. Very good writing.
Main emphasis here being the horror. Its very good work. Moment I saw the various scenes I kept telling myself " And here I thought true horror was dead"
The jumpscares are either kept to an absolute minimum and when included, never feel cheap. The build-up & tension is incredibly well executed. The emphasis on SHOW, DONT TELL is absolutely beautiful and a breath of fresh air. Some of the shows best scenes dont include exceptional dialog. Its just you, the actors and the slowly building tension before the camera shows the monsters.
Exceptional understanding of horror cinematography. I applaud you Mike Flanagan. Extremely good and well executed in every way.
Even fantastic directors like James Wan could learn a lot from you / this show. Much of whats present here would've helped on the overrated (in my opinion) Insidious / Conjuring films.
But anyway. What are the shows cons here?
Fairly simple. Its weakness is its strength. The adaptation of Shirley's book itself. The ending, full circle and all that is not going to be for everyone. matter of fact, seeing it made me consider lowering my score to a 7 or 8 from a 9 because I'm a fan of the book and the original story. The sheer terror of such an evil house being emphasised so delicately to its every detail. Hugh Crain was a monster.
So seeing this adaptation and how it ended had me... well, in a state of cognitive dissonance because I wanted a darker ending. I wanted the house to appear far more monstrous. I wanted to see more than just lots of dead people, some good, some bad and only 1-2 of them actually appear remotely menacing without ever having much of a character.
In other words. The villain in the book was Hugh. A well fleshed out evil man that cursed his own house. Much alike Rose Red's had Ellen Rimbaur from Stephen King's novel who kept building on Rose Red and got rid of anyone who stood in her away. Either joining her in death or just dying under mysterious and horrible circumstances.
But in this abreviation of Hill House, we dont have a clear villain. At first we think its the house. Then we begin seeing mainly 1 evil spirit and a whole lot others that dont really do too much. And we dont know if its the house thats still the enemy at the end, OR if its just a few malovolent spirits that can be diplomatically told to screw off if you encounter a spirit thats friendly.
In other words. This abbreviation reminds me of Casper the Friendly Ghost. Casper was nice, his house compadres... werent'.
And after seeing the end of this, how the evil spirit just walks away and the rest just remain there, in their new / home they were always meant to be in, kinda thing, we're left with this idea that " Is the house really evil? Or is the house just... complex and both possessing good and evil alike"
And its just weird. Its a bit confusing and makes us ponder and although I usually LOVE doing that, I primarily enjoy the pondering of an ending that respects the original concept.
Case in point. Eleanor and the child spirits. Ellen Rimbaur and the ghosts at Rose Red. What will ever happen to them. Will the house just remain this haunted, horrible place. Will they just vanish if the house got demolished. Stuff like that.
But in this abbreviation we pretty much know it all. The red door to the secret room is not very secretive. We never get an explanation to whats so special about it. The room itself is incredible simplistic and once again. The red room in Shirley's book signified a special place. Heart of the house and core of the monster himself = Hugh.
But here... its just a room. And thats it. And it doesn't feel evil. Since the spirits can open or close the door. In other words, NOT the house itself. The spirits are the problem. The spirits continue feeding and killing people.
And that the disconnect I had personally. The villain is hard to put your finger to.
Rose red = Ellen Rimbaur Shirley's Hill House = Hugh Crain.
2018 Hill house = The house? The evil lady spirit?
We have it established that the house is feeding off of people. Their energy. How the Crain's is described as an unfinished meal.
But when we look closer and we see whats really going on we dont really get a specific villain and the ones we do get are NOT strong at all.
Sad, jealous ghost lady who's name I dont even think we are told that comes across as a seductive damsel versus Ellen Rimbaur who loved children and her house more than anything and decided to get rid of ANYONE that dared hurt what she loved till she became crazy.
Let alone Hugh Crain himself. The tyrannical killer of children only to imprison them in death. They are all horrifying and add to the house ITSELF having someone in charge. Someone who triggered the traumatic event that brought this dark energy to life.
But in this TV show it feels like each protanogist is their own villain in shape of their guilt, fears and on TOP of that, an evil spirit lady.
It ultimately means that we dont know how exactly Hill House came to be so dark. We hear about a few deaths in order but we never truly get an exact clarification or visual discovery as to why stuff happened or when.
Just that people died 1 by one. And that means that...? The house wants to kill you little by little to feed? The house is automatically demonic? Because thats not what either Rose Red or the original book Hill House was about.
That is more reminicent of Stephen Kings The Shining. A house that uses hatred and sadness to destroy people. Filled with evil spirits. But the spirits in King's version or the movie never feel like they are the sole problem. The horror of the house... is always maintained. There's something greater here. Something evil.
But anyway. If you can accept the series for what it is. This new abbreviation, its a straight 9 to a 10 depending on whether or not you can accept it all. I personally have no criticism of this outside of this colossal con I've elaborated on.
I wanted an ending that showed a FAR darker side of the house. I wanted to see something really grim inside that room. I wanted something right out of the Shining to happen.
I wanted catharsis from a horror perspective.
But instead the abbreviation went for emotional clarity, redemption of the mother who was once again, tricked by the evil lady spirit (The house's role is unclear entirely. It just feels like a prison for spirits but we never know how that house even became such a thing outright and thats a shame since the house is the primary villain all the way up to the end. Its the strange, mysterious figure we are anxious to see, learn more about and dread at the same time... but alas, no climax)
We get our protanogists leaving the house, resolving their issues, fears and worries, and ultimately see them live happily ever after sorta whilst daddy goes to join the dead daughter and mother in the house where they they will reside, happily and at peace.
I dont mind optimistic endings. I'd actually welcome an ending like this if they only bothered to give us a far better, darker explanation to the house. In the House Hill movie with Liam Neeson we get a positive ending too and its fine. Its just that we got to see the TRUE evil of the house.
And understand just why it was so dark, who the monster truly was and see it conquered. Here however, the dead lady simply isn't scary. she's not intimidating and she's just not given any time to be fleshed out either. She's not fleshed out to remotely compete with villains already mentioned and her conclusion can be summarized like " Hey, you! Get your hands off my man! --- Okay, sorry (leaves)" The end. It felt extremely anti-climactic since I was anticipating something scary. Something horrifying and extremely dark. Monstrous and demonic. The very thing, the black heart of the house that caused ALL this pain and kept all these spirits here maybe.
But we never get it.
Its all just a shame. Ghost lady completely steals the focus from the house being the main form of concern. At the end you're like " House is just a house. The spirits are just screwed up and try to manipulate you to kill yourself"
I dont like it. So I'll keep my score at 8. A damn fantastic show but not a masterpiece. I'm basing that solely on personal opinion. I dont find any issues with acting or cinematography. Everything is superb.
I just have a problem with this specific abbreviation. Should you watch this show? GOD YES. I had a blast for 8 episodes. The final 2 when the evil lady was appeared I began losing interest. The mystery was replaced with a weak villain and yeah. Rest I've already explained more than enough.
Sorry for my repeats. I'm just bummed by this. I had hoped for a grand finale and we certainly got that, just not in a sense of true horror and cathartic build-up of the original villain = Hill House itself. Hell House...
8 out of 10. Great series from an objective point of view. Worth your time. Fantastic emphasis on classic, true horror and its a cinematographic masterpice from the perspective of not being a cheap, modern horror. THIS show sets the standard for how to do Horror these days.
And I greatly respect it for that.
The Predator (2018)
Creatively bankcrupt. 3 out of 10 because Requiem on IMDB is 4. And this is far worse.
Creatively bankcrupt. Huge CGI predator with lots of CGI blood and CGI scenes and bla bla bla bla... thats 50 % of the film. Btw when it dies its blood is light blue. They changed that too for reasons... because apparently a light blue color is more fitting than weird acidic green.
These artists dont understand what people expect when seeing an Alien.
The humans are between mediocre and okay ... and absolutely horifically annoying. Its transformers level bad humor. Over the top, weird and rushy like in dialog.
I mean get this. You got Tomas Jane ( FINE ACTOR. Love him) sitting at a table. Olivia Munn awakens after being knocked out and tries to leave. They dont stop her. dialog happens. Suddenly Tomas jane says " Eat my P---- can't type that because IMDB) and NOBODY LAUGHS. NOBODY.... not in the film. Not in the theater. Everyone...is silent. Olivia munn turns around and says " Did you ....did you just say that? "
And then he begins saying " Oh no. i said something else similar to it" And its this... bad CRINGE WORTHY joke that just has everyone facepalm out of sheer weirdness. Now, tourettes can be fun. Absolutely. Hollywood made great films showing it. Especially with STeve carell. Hilarious stuff.
But this isn't a comedy movie. This is Predator. And this one line is only one out of many cringy jokes and lines. The your momma jokes are even worse.
There is 1 good joke here and thats when our main lead tells the WHOLE bus of shell-shocked crazies to Shut the F up. And they all begin laughing out loud in hysteria and that was legit fun because its literally what the audience was thinking.
But its just weak. The whole film. THe action, the effects, the predator just get F'ed up and then you're left with mega CGI dude that isn't scary at all because CGI... ( jesus christ hollywood. Know your limitations)
It's rated R but it hardly earns it because of how much violence either IS or just looks like CGI blood and alike. The big predator kills a bunch of soldiers and it never feels scary or violent compared to the old. Hell even compared to AVP.
Its boring. And on top of that they dont learn from Alien's mistakes and begin changing established lore. Because Fox just doesn't get it.
Predators dont care about honor or glory or any of that stuff anymore. Now its all about 1 thing = DNA. Autistic DNA to be specific to enhance their genetics and become better hunters.
Its incredibly insulting and boring. Borderline infuriating because the predators are already genetically superior. Taller, stronger, more capable of resisting bodily damage. Faster, able to climb in crazy places and possess vastly superior intellect.
And now they want Human DNA... because reasons that are = Hiring Fred Dekker as a writer so ofc you gotta have a kid in the movie !!!
The kid... the Kid is just cringe. Learning the predator language in 5 minutes because Autism
Learning how to use predator technology in 5 minutes because autism. This is the degree of writing competence we're dealing with here, ladies and gentlemen.
Its unbelivably lazy and boring. And TOTALLY RUINS the older films in terms of lore. Why was danny Glover let go if he beat a predator and might've had something genetically superior they wanted? WHO KNOWS. DONT MAKE SENSE.
Why would the AVP predators honor Lex and give her the spear and then let her go if she was so capable of surviving? WHO KNOWS. NO SENSE.
Dont even get the started on the comics.
This change makes no sense and its because its not about creativity. its about Hollywood banking in on the OVERUSED technology flavour of the decade trend thats going on atm.
Everything needs to have a scientific reason. Not moral or magical. It must be science!!! And its just so boring. And lazily written as a result because its an afterthought. Something to just cater to people that like that which aren't the majority at all.
Predator was always a small film. Good but small. The budgets have always remained small and they should just cater to the fans they have and not try to cater to others because it wont work.
Same thing happened with Tomb Raider a few months ago. It screwed up the whole story of the video game Tomb Raider 2013 and mixed up the movies story with brand new characters, removal of established ones, combined 2 games together and removed ALL MAGIC AND MYSTERY in favour of " Virus"
And guess what. It failed. It was freaking boring. Lazily written and directed. Completely devoid of creativity too because they dont know these franchises at all yet wanna make money.
This is the worst predator film I've ever seen. And the fact that it stole Requiem's place on the worst list.... is something I'm still shocked by.
Why ? Because it ruins established lore. It cheapens the predator with BS CGI crap. It doesnt offer ANYTHING new at all other than stupidity and non-sensical plot points meant to raise attention to what? Autism? Jesus... there are so many better movies out there doing exactly that. Fantastic films at that.
People dont watch a predator film to see children with Autism. They watch it to watch people get killed in brutal ways and find clever ways of surviving. And the budget ALWAYS went to make that happen.
But here. THe budget went to boring locations, boring interiors, boring sequences where people sit in living rooms telling bad jokes and have freaking bike chases in the dark so you can't see anything anyway...
And of course lots and LOTS of CGI. its so boring. So low energy.
Final words: I just rewatched predator 2. And I was looking for just how many cool things about the predators we saw compared to the new one.
Predator 2: Wristblades, healing gadgetry like transportable fire, melting blue liquid, healing stims and more. We got cloaking, self destruct devices, like a DOZEN of different vision modes, spear gun, a net gun, a mini missile attached to the wrist gadget, a chakram, a spear, a lazer shoulder cannon, and a huge space ship filled with trophies of various creatures plus additional tools they use to refine the trophies. And best of all we have our traditional tribal mixed with high tech armor / outfit and helmet.
How about the new predator?
The Predator divided into 2 sections:
The normal predator = Weird looking impractical superhero looking armor. No clear idea of his many tools except for around 1 scene showing the wrist blade and shoulder cannon ( I think), wrist gadget as always and shortly after we see the predator vanish he just dies. Gets beaten up and killed by mega pred who I'll focus on now because he's the real focus of the movie.
CGI predator monster: No helmet, no spear gun, no net gun, no clear vision modes, no chakram, no traditional shoulder cannon, no armor. Why? BECAUSE ITS ALL BUILT IN HIS BODY. And we cannot really see it but its there... ---___--- This is a testament to why SHOW, DONT TELL, is so mega important in films. And why this mega pred is a terrible idea and is destroying the franchise.
If he tries to kill people he does 3 things. He uses the wrist blade. Or fires the wristblades at someone ranged attack OR he uses the built in lazer in his wrist thing again.
Its so lazy and made so boring. Simplistic and downgraded. And this is supposed to be cooler ??? Jesus.
And there you go. Thats what they spent 8 years on. One big CGI mess with less of the stuff we love and more of the stuff we hate and didn't want to see.
Such as the Ironman Predator armor at the end that makes 0 freaking sense either and is a horribly boring idea & concept.
It just stinks of Shane having no idea what to do and beginning to copy other films like Transformers, Ironman, Alien and Requiem. mashing it all together into the abomination we have now.
it doesn't matter that Shane was in the original Predator. Because he was there for the least amount of time. He had barely any screentime, or dialog. He was the guy with the bad jokes. The End. And it shows in this film.
Shane has no business directing this franchise just like Maradona has no business coaching the Argentinian football team. They were okay actors / players but have NO CLUE....how to Direct/coach. And thats just how life is sometimes.
So. Should you pay to watch this film? haha. SURE. If you liked Requiem and thought nothing at all was wrong with it ESPECIALLY concerning the humans.
But if you didn't... be warned. Its worse than Requiem. And thats something I gotta hand the director and writer. I'm impressed. I didn't think you could F up harder than that...
Will this kill the franchise? Financially no. Logically and soulwise, Yes. espect this turning into freaking Transformers now or Resident Evil for that matter.
Thats the direction this franchise is heading.
Shadow of the Tomb Raider (2018)
I was so worried about this game. Seeing the trailers had me grinding my teeth, fearing a generic killing simulator. But I was proven totally wrong.
I love... being able to write this. Its like a rock on my chest and shoulder, crumbling and giving me relief. I had such a huge beef with Rise. Felt it was way too distant from learning about Lara as a character, Story was massively uninteresting, too focused on combat and Siberia was so "sigh". Puzzles were too easy and rewards were too boring and at times annoying " stuff auto glowing when nearby. WTF... "
But.... thats in the past now. The dev listened. To every bit of criticism and they fixed the issues of both 2013 and Rise and they gave us a fantastic conclusion to this trilogy, easily the BEST of the trilogy and a game that has me extremely optimistic for the future of this franchise.
Pros: Improved gunplay. Lovely tombs and crypts. More customization. Greater challenge all around and with customizable difficulty as well. Gun and bow sounds are vastly improved. Which fixes issues I had with weird pew sounds and alike. IT sounds realistic and meaty now. Its great. The world is larger. Zones are beautiful. More life. More people. More variation between NPCS's and not Rise's copy pasted face 300 times.
People you interact with are nice, interesting and give you cool rewards for you listening or helping. Anything is useful. More vendors as well.
And we do far less killing and far more exploring, talking, climbing, swimming and tomb raiding this time. Which is a huge Pro for me. A step in the right direction. Letting this franchise be its own thing and not an uncharted clone.
The biggest Pro for me... is the narrative. Lara as well as Jonah are SO WELL FLESHED OUT. We get so much more character development, progress. Moments of bonding, cool flashback sequences that are fun and relevant with puzzles added in too alike Anniversary DLC from Rise ( the BEST thing in that game In my own opinion. That DLC = 10 out of 10). Moments where Lara is hurting, or just rushing ahead, and Jonah is there to bring her back down. Give her a reality check and challenge her. Highlighting she doesn't have everything under control. She is only human. And as the game so eloquently puts it " We all create destiny Together" this message is spun so well from start to finish. No god mode. Teamwork is key. And its just beautiful. Making Lara way more of a relatable character. A down to earth realistic person you empathize with. And not just a killing machine with no personality = Rise.
Its wonderful. They listened to so much feedback. So much criticism. And they gave us the best tomb raider of this Trilogy. Polished story, characters, locations, combat, customization, difficulty, world building and NO MORE OPTIONAL TOMBS. Thank God....that was so bloody annoying. Now its just " Tombs and Crypts"
No more screwing with immersion or BS. Tombs offer far better rewards too. stuff you dont want to miss. Unlike Rise. (I know I know. I can't stop but I hate that bloody game lol. )
Anyway. Its wonderful.
What about cons?
Well. Dont play this game with Exclusive fullscreen and tab out or you're screwed by horrible stuttering. Optimization can be wonky sometimes. But 98 % of the time it runs flawlessly. Some sudden camera changes mid jumps can at times kill you and really anger you. But it happens seldomly but beware playing on max difficulty because of it. No autosave and this happening is enough to make your blood.... BOIL. Losing 20-30 minutes of progress +.
Other than that. Nothing actually other than decisions I disagree with.
Nr 1: No dual wield. They could've and should've given us that. I know why they didn't but it really is overdue since 2013 teased it at the end 5 years ago.
Nr 2: Still unable to remove silencers from your rifle or pistol if you attach it. This is meh. Hoped they'd learn that from Rise.
Nr 3: When you arrive in paititi, you can only wear maybe 20-30 % of all your unlocked outfits. And only talk to Rebels using 1 specific one. This would be fine to begin with but later on you should've gotten their trust and then wear whatever you want. I got like 10 outfits and another 5-6 custom made ones. And I cannot use them because I wanna do quests and stuff. Thats dumb. We should be able to wear whatever outfits we wanted to after we gained their trust which is like 1 quest.
Nr 4: Unable to use Mud camouflage at will. There are very specific combat areas where you can use mud. Other places have none. And if you're not in combat or near combat areas you cannot interact with mud pits. Thats kinda meh for those of us who wanted to go hunting using camouflage but no E to interact option appears. So that was a bummer. WHen it works tho, its fantastic. Cool feature. The Rambo / Arnie in predator angle was very badass. And stealth has many more cool animations too so it sucked being unable to use it often with Mud camo.
Nr 5: Removing auto save from max difficulty. This is the last one and its personal. I played this game on max difficulty at first. Progressed 60-70 %. Then I stopped and restarted. And it was because I was getting insanely F'ing angry. I was tired... of dying and dying and dying because of lag or camera changes, swinging lara's face 180 degrees to the right, mid jump so I fall to my death and lose half an hour of progress and exploring. It absolutely sucked and drove me so upset I stopped enjoying the game outright.
I LOVE HARD MODE. I love tough enemies. I Love tough challenges. And all that good stuff. But I rebooted on the lower difficulty instead because when a game has these sorts of punishing bugs or glitches and offers no auto-save... it quickly goes from " Argh. Gotta git gut" to "GTFO....." Borderline rage quit. I rebooted. Played the whole thing on a slightly easier difficulty and cleansed my memory of the crap. And had a blast. 9 out of 10 level amazing. Because if I had completed the game with that amount of punishing deaths, I knew the score would've been the same, but my memory of it would've been extremely negative. Straight up elevated blood pressure whilst reading the credits. And I didn't want that.
Come the next game. Make enemies tougher. make it so headshots dont 1 shot. Make so you die taking 1 single hit of damage. Crazy stuff like that. Thats fine. Roll, dodge, take cover. use stealth.
But removing auto-save.... is just cruel and excessively punishing. It doesn't make the game harder that I gotta re-do a 30 minute section and redo a crypt or tomb. It just makes it tedious and annoying. And after investing 30 hours into MAX difficulty....I can bloody well guarantee you that it didn't change my mind in the slightest, dying countless times and losing all.
I just got angrier and sadder and realized that if I complete the game in 5 minutes I'll just be upset and not enjoy it.
Thats not Very Hard Difficulty. Thats bad game design and punishing us who want the toughest enemies and tombs. And what adds insult to injury was that even on max difficulty I 1 shotted enemies with headshots. As well as animals. It didn't matter. It took 3 hits to die from stuff.
The only change is removal of auto save and thats just evil and tedious. Not hard. And I'd like to see that fixed in the next game.
Final thoughts: One big thing I loved about this game was how they did MORE with the mythological monster angle. The native underground beings we first fight end up being our allies and we get a huge revelation how the queen of the rebels we assist is actually sort of symbiotic with the queen figure of the underground native monsters. And even how different they are... they both want the same thing and live in harmony. Cooperation.
And its just so cool and different from Rise that showed us the cool byzantine soldiers that turned out to be just... generic zombies with fire arrows and nothing else really happened. Unlike Himiko's Stormguard that were FAR more intimidating and fleshed out as monsters you gotta be wary of. Plus Samurai are epic.
I loved to see them do more with the supernatural creatures this time. They just evolved on such much yet could've innovated more in a few places which is what keeps this game from a perfect rating. Such as for instance, making the world bigger and more open. Maybe even letting lara traverse using a vehicle or such. But hey. Maybe next game.
Either way. For what we got compared to its predecessors, its a damn fantastic game. And definitely the best of the trilogy.
Thank you for an epic journey and a fantastic conclusion to this part of Lara's story. I'll look forward to see what comes next.
According to the patched day 1 Ending... a little letter spoke of Natla the Atlantean in India. Time shall tell what happens next.
I'm just happy that I had a blast unlike in Rise and I feel good about being excited for the future for this franchise.
9 out of 10. damn fantastic ride. Lots of fixes and improvements. The MOST tomb raider feeling game of the trilogy. Intelligent and harder puzzles to solve. Cool stories and interesting lore. Wonderful & deep character development and improved, meaty combat that is well balanced without being overly excessive.
Thank you for listening, developers. Thank you.
Can't wait to see what comes next.
They absolutely ruined the whole game by not giving a single #### about fixing the lacking combat system
I hate writing this. I hate this with a passion and its because I love EVERYTHING else about this game. And as a fan of DontNod's Remember Me this blows on an astronomical level. What the F happened?! How did this get past Q&A? HOW did this get approved? Did nobody remotely ask themselves if this was gonna be satisfying to play?
Do yourself a favour. Downvote me if you're a fanboy. Spare yourself the time reading because this is gonna be a huge damn review.
Good. Now lets get into a quick summary of the Pros of this game:
Its visually stunning, fantastic music, great sound design, a true return to gothic horror for sure. In terms of cinematic killing, dialog, exploring personalities, and much more concerning the RPG aspect the game shines in my personal opinion. I might be a bit biased because I love vampires so there is that. I dont find it boring. I love the blood system, gaining Xp as you feed, improving blood quality, affecting the city per kill, struggling with moral choices and consequences depending on who dies and why.
All this sounds great. Its every vampire players wet dream. To be in control of life and death and either save everyone or murder them, giving in to your vampiric nature. YOU got the choice, dear reader.
But it all comes to a stop. Con time: Now. I'll show you exactly what Im talking about here to give you a perfect idea of what exactly to expect and how Little DontNod bothered to flesh out a satisfying combat system that REMOTELY features any degree of realism.
--Nr 1: https://imgur.com/a/QU1oS0i What the hell is this? A stun option? No kill option? Of course not because the game doesn't feature a stealth system. So what happens once you stun him you ask? Easy, friends. He just drops, loses all stamina and gets back up in 4 seconds. No easy kill? No non-lethal kill? NOPE. because why think of that right?
--Nr 2: https://imgur.com/a/aVwHNZW All bodies are clean. I killed these 2 dudes using a machete.... but no blood was present except on the floor. Is this like 1st gen console Graphics or what, DontNod? Why the hell is your combat Graphics SO lackluster. Its downright embarassingly mediocre which makes no sense at all because of the next picture...
--Nr 3: https://imgur.com/a/leqZWUF As you can see here, Gore, brutality, guts and more IS present in the game. But the devs decided to make it all static mesh files you couldn't interact with. In Vampire The Masquerade: Bloodlines you had abilities that could create this level of brutality. The player also had stealth mechanics and otherwise to go for pretty sweet and brutal kills that 1 shot via stealth. Decapitation was present, gory body explosions were present. And far more. It all fit the genre of VAMPIRE GAME:
--Nr 4: Here is an example of to what degree the devs explored autopsy details on NPC's = https://imgur.com/a/4lVlMyz Why is it, DontNod? That you bothered to Little by applying ANY degree of attention to detail to your combat system when you literally made it IMPOSSIBLE to avoid. If mean, if Combat was an afterthought and you primarily wanted to tell a story about walking, talking, cinematic kills etc. I dont have a problem with that... BUT THEN WHY THE HELL?! WHY THE #### DID YOU MAKE COMBAT HAPPEN SO OFTEN?! mandatory boss fights? No stealth approach? And yet you didn't remotely bother trying to add some satisfying texture and graphical Fidelity to the impact of your weapons AND SPELL usage.
You can shoot, you can slash, you can hammer, you can slaw, you can rend, you can bite, you can IMPALE...AND EXPLODE.... but nothing will ever ever happen. Your combat system... is embarassingly sterile. SO neutered. SO safe and stale.
Furthermore here is an in depth explanation of how Combat works: You will press left click all day long, maybe right click to shoot a gun or stun with an off hand weapon. Then you'll bite a bit dealing not any major damage but gain blood to use vampiric powers. And thats it. Sounds simple and workable. Except its not. The gun I like but it deals no bloody damage at all. The vampiric powers are fun but drain your mana / blood supply SO ridiculously fast. And then you're left with left click.
I swear I thought I was playing f#cking RAVENS CRY at times. Im not joking. Its a swinging left click spam. Here comes the issue with this primarily: YOU CANNOT BLOCK! You CANNOT RIPOSTE / counter attack, YOU CANNOT DO COMBOS. They dont exist. Which is.... mindblowing considering DontNod made the combo-heaven game of Remember Me.
So yes. You'll just strafe / Dodge all day long. And left click. Now, I love Witcher 3 which ideally did much the same. Witcher did feature blocking, counter attacking and otherwise. But mostly I will admit I was dodging and swinging. So whats the difference? Am I being hypocritical?
The answer is no and Ill explain why in the simplest way possible. Witcher 3 had very beautiful animations, and features LOTS of variation to swings, both heavy and light, and best of all Witcher 3 featured quite possibly the best gore system I've personally ever seen. Arms, heads, feet, legs, torsos, splitting the skulls... ALL of it was included to make Geralts sword feel extremely deadly and satisfying to use to kill bandits or monsters.
I'd love to see more emphasis on blocking and such in Witcher 3 but I got over it because of how the gore made up for its lack there.
Vampyr... commits the sin there that kills my will to play the game no matter how much I LOVE everything else. It drops me into monotonous, boring, bland, stale, clean, repetative combat that will only get harder as the game Progress. And if I dont kill to get stronger ( civillians) itll only get more tanky and more annoying. Its an absolute game-breaker. There isn't even a difficulty setting..... its as if the devs thought people wouldn't mind being FORCED to deal with this atrociously F"cking awful combat the Whole game...
Which will only get harder if you play pacifist and dont feed on civiallians, which will mean youll deal FAR less damage and have access to less abilities. HOW FUN... Not only do you give us a garbage combat system that is totally DEVOID of any good gore. But you force us to play it on hard mode if we wanna help people.
F"cking great, DontNod. Thank you. Truly. Come on, Guys... I know you can do better than this. I know you can. If there was one thing I couldn't say about Remember Me's combat system is what that I got bored. Never. Not for a second. It wasn't perfect but it was engaging and had great variation. Plus cool finish moves too. Why couldn't Vampyr ? A cool stealth finisher? Or some cool gore to spicen up the combat Visuals although it was lackluster. baseline aspects that would nevertheless help on the feel of the very prevalent combat and boss fights.
The game feels really clunky. When you sprint the camera zoomes out which makes you feel like you're moving slower. Its wonky and weird to look at but I can get over it. But what I simply cannot get over is this total disregard for making combat feel satisfying.
Its monumentally unrealistic and immersion breaking to astronomical degree when you chop and slice people that nothing at all happens
Summary of lacking gore= No wounds, no blood spatter on NPC's, no scars, no bite marks, no dismemberment, no NOTHING except blood spatter that lands on the floor and vanishes in 30 seconds. Jesus christ.... I'm amazed the bodies dont just sink into the floor like older games rofl. That would've been the cherry on top of this review.
This is a vampire game. And in any vampire game bloody Visuals and gore is a MUST. Its a god damn baseline requirement and Im amazed Dont Nod didn't know that or didn't care. They didn't remotely bother with blood, gore, bite marks outside of cinematic kills and the like. The entire combat system is neutered and if you ask yourself if you can avoid it and just enjoy the rest you cant. because combat is very prevalent. If they couldn't do the combat Justice they should've never even tried to put a combat system in a game like this. Its absolutely atrociously awful. Its embarassingly bad visually as well as dynamically.
4 out of 10. If the combat was removed, I'd probably rate this game anywhere between 7 and 10. Just to give you an idea of how well the rest of the game is made and holds up on its own. DontNod killed their own game, doomed it to fail by not giving one less of a f#ck about fixing these problems or remotely bothering adding any degree of gore to the aftermath of damage impact.
I'm not asking for Quentin Tarantino here... I'm just asking for some degree of bloody realism and satisfying experience when you're literally letting us be a monster with super powers.
Vampyr is the biggest disappointment of 2018 for me so far. I'm still waiting to hear from the dev why the hell... they decided not to put more effort into their combat systems graphical Fidelity. Its so simple... because the resources ARE already in game.
I'll return to this game if modders fix it or if the devs release a gore DLC or patch. But if that never happens... I'd far rather play witcher 3 or Vampire The Masquerade Bloodlines. A game almost 20 years old that does this better...
God damnit, DontNod... you screwed up.
Solo: A Star Wars Story (2018)
An above average star wars story. Not great, not bad, just an okay entertaining time.
Okay so, first things.
The cast is good. Acting is good. Everyone is treated with respect and given some cool scenes and worth to the film, unlike TLJ. Furthermore, the movie isn't "feminized" or anything alike what the Info Wars "soy boy" band wagon jumping fools say it is. Soy isn't even feminizing either ( proven false 8 years ago) but what do you expect from Info Wars followers... So yes. Nothing bad or politically tempered about our characters except Lando who has a crush on his droid "girlfriend" but it didn't play a big part in the film though. Personally, if the droid was like a pleasure droid with a woman face from games like SWTOR then I could possibly understand it but this thing is like as droid as it gets. But hey. Whatever lol. I honestly dont care. Lando was cool. We got some funny scenes between him and Han too including pazzak Card games happening which is a first.
So. Is Alden able to take on the role of Han ? Sometimes yes, sometimes... meh. All in all, I personally dont really care. Harrison is done. We're getting the movie whether we like it or not, so I'll just take it for what it is on this. Would Ingruber have been better? Possibly. Who knows. Its not relevant anymore. So thats the end of that. Alden did okay.
Now. In general I'd say the movie was okay. Some cool scenes, some nice background revelations ( hans last name, his blaster, the falcon etc)
Unfortunately, its a rather generic plot. Not particularly mindblowing. Cool, sure, but not more than that. Solo is a mix of 3 Things. Western heist genre + Guardians of the Galaxy + Star Wars. And the execution has both hits and misses. But in terms of what we got as a finished product... I found the film to be entertaining more than bland feeling. Both were however present. It felt a bit rushed at times, occasionally it was as if the action was non-stop over the story. But yeah... heist movie.
But what angered me the most was the same thing that continues to appear in modern star wars films. The Music... John Williams has lost it. The Solo theme sucks. Its so damn generic and out of place. Honestly... ever since Williams stopped working with George something has just been missing. Idk if its coincidence or if Williams has just grown old but its over.
Dear Disney and Lucas Film. STOP RE-INVENTING THE WHEEL! DO NOT MAKE NEW STAR WARS MUSIC. Just recycle the old. ESPECIALLY for these prequel films. The only good music this film had was the tracks it borrowed from the original trilogy. But then in between scenes as tension was rising they CONSTANTLY.... had the bloody Solo Theme playing over and over and over and over. I get music is repetition but F#CK... get a grip. It was as if you had 3-4 music themes MAX to work with for every single action scene in the ENTIRE movie. and you kept overlapping them together into this monstrosity of auditorial malfunction.
just use the old music, please... Thank you. You're absolutely destroying the immersion whenever you have the original trilogy tracks play that make us all nostalgic but then play something TOTALLY different 1 second later, overlapping because your guy in charge of sound design hasn't a god damn CLUE in HELL what star wars is supposed to sound like.
This angers me... because if the music was better I'd have enjoyed the film far more. Rogue One had the same issue. The music in the new trilogy has the same issue. Its distorted, weird, non-star warsian. Rogue One's music was a disaster. It wasn't even music. It was noise.
The original tracks weren't just Star Wars or made for the original film THEY WERE PERFECTION. And you dont touch that... so STOP IT.
Rant over. 6 out of 10. Above average film. Heist western star wars Flick with some good scenes, fun throwbacks and such. The cast worked well together and all in all its a star wars story for western / die hard Han Solo fans and pretty much nobody else.
But honestly. had they just bothered getting the music right I would've enjoyed the film far more.
But maybe I'm just a hardcore star wars fan on this topic of music. I grew up with the originals and prequels and love both to death. Is this film worth your time? Sure. If you dont mind what I listed above too much and can keep an open mind to the recasting of Han Solo. Otherwise watch it online for free. But one thing thats worth mentioning is the fact that there film ends on sequel bait concerning Darth Maul. Yes, Maul appears in a hologram, talking to Qira who tells her to come to Dathomir. Maul is older, still menacing, got his mechanical legs from the looks of it, and the full Black robe.
So Im definitely interested in seeing where they'll go Next. Do I want I sequel, you ask? Yes I actually do. But only if they fix the bloody music issues. Seriously. Its destroying all of these films. Rogue One's grand spectacle of a super positive orchestral melody as the star destroyer got smashed into was so UNBELIVABLY out of place. They just dont understand how to handle the music anymore IMO.
But yeah. Seeing more of Maul in the future would be quite epic. Maybe even in the Obi Wan movie. 6 out of 10. I'd like to see more. Something less generic than a heist ( I dont know why they could've just smuggle something instead of spending time with trains and stuff) But anyway. I hope we see more.