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Van Helsing (2004)
7 May 2004
I love action movies and summer blockbuster more than most people I know, but Van Helsing is absolutely awful. I don't expect Academy Award winning performances in a movie like this, but VH quite possibly has some of the worst acting in the history of cinema. The guy who plays Dracula should never be allowed to appear in film again and Dracula's brides are the most annoying characters I've seen in a movie in a long......well, ever! The movie is like a 2+ hour video game with more CGI than Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, The Matrix, Hulk and The Terminator combined. The action scenes are horribly redundant and the ending is cheesier than most chick flicks. I guess I should have expected a bad movie from the guy who gave us The Mummy Returns. I'm sure Van Helsing will probably do $40-50 million at the box office this weekend, but I can't wait to see the drop-off next weekend once word of mouth spreads about this pile of crap. Save your money and wait for something good like Troy of Spider-Man 2.........there's no way they can suck as bad as Van Helsing.
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Bad Boys II (2003)
It's a movie, people.......if you don't like it, stay home!
2 August 2003
I really get a kick out of all the people crying about how violent, profane and indecent they found Bad Boys II to be. Hello!!! It's an R-Rated action movie(and a damn fine one at that) so what exactly were you expecting, Finding Nemo? I like the fact that Michael Bay and Jerry Bruckheimer had the balls to release a take-no-prisoners action flick like this instead of a "pussified" PG-13 movie like everything else Hollywood has given us this summer(Hollywood Homicide, Tomb Raider, 2 Fast 2 Furious, Charlie's Angels Full Throttle, The Hulk, etc). If you don't want to see a movie with a lot of violence and profanity, the solution is simple.......STAY HOME! There are plenty of other movies out there to see this summer so it's your own fault for going to a movie you know you're not going to like in the first place. I agree that a couple of scenes were probably unnecessary(I could have done without the morgue and the bodies falling out of the van), but other than that I thought this movie was the perfect action film and the best thing I've seen this summer. It's funny as hell and the action is non-stop from beginning to end. What more can you ask for from a summer movie? Don't listen to all the pompous movie critics because they don't like action films in the first place and they are very biased in their opinions. All they want you to see is movies like Seabiscuit or The English Patient. Well, screw that! I like movies where a lot of s**t blows up and as everyone knows, Michael Bay blows s**t up better than anybody in Hollywood. Go see Bad Boys II and actually get your money's worth from a movie this summer(a rarity indeed).
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