KirnehGlitch Reviews

The Tourist (I) (2010)

Deja Vu!

[3/10 · 31 January 2011]

This was a Deja Vu for me, it's the exact same movie as the French version called "Anthony Zimmer" from 2005, just much much worse. The only thing one pay for is the names of the cast, which was also very disappointing because Depp and Jolie had no connection what-so-ever. The movie was missing a lot of important plot moments, and with those missing, it seemed as if some of the parts was missing half the story in order for a proper build up. There is no real humor, only one part if my memory serves me right, and come on, in movies which are made like this, we need some good jokes to keep us watching.

I recommend you do not watch this one, and rent "Anthony Zimmer" instead, because that movie was great.

I rate this ***

Chain Letter (2010)

Too Late

[6/10 · 31 January 2011]

The movie starts out very well and the whole movie has the golden rules for horror, which most of us have gotten tired of since it makes movies too predictable, and this movie is no exception.

The movie builds up very well and with good pacing. You get the chance to get to know a few of the characters on a deeper level, but nothing to stand up for. The gore is very well made and not over done, that's actually the best about this movie, the killings. The ending was very weak, very predictable and didn't leave you in awe as Secret Window or Identity did.

Chain Letters, we have all received them and we all hate them, and most of us delete them before finishing reading them without thinking about it. That's what makes this movie quite alright on the plot part, it's a nice fresh idea to what Wes Craven started back in '96 with "Scream" (the teenage horror flicks) or perhaps he started it with "A Nightmare on Elm Street" back in '84, depends on how you look at it.

I kind of liked the movie, but it's a one time watch. You should watch this when you're in the mood for a simple flick with minimum amount of brain activity usage, because this is not one to watch when you're actually in the mood for a movie evening with your partner or friends.

I rate this ******

Killers (2010)

Not worth the time!

[3/10 · 31 January 2011]

Ashton Kutcher playing the lead along with Katherine Heigl in this "action/comedy". It has a very slow start about a couple meeting on vacation, getting married and living in the suburbs and around 2/3rd in the movie their life get turned up side down. A very basic, boring plot to say the least. Well, I didn't expect much more from Katherine Heigl, nor Ashton Kutcher, since they're nothing more than faces in Hollywood with no real talent for acting.

Let's be honest, this movie is nothing more than a way to make a few bucks of the cast. I wasn't disappointed because I expected it to flop. The action parts are good though, the twist(not twists) also gave the movie a little boost, but not quite enough to say this movie is great or even good for that matter. There are a few small giggles through out the movie, but not worth a LOL or a remaining smile like we experienced with Ace Venture, Bad Boys 2 and Kick-Ass.

A very personal opinion: Ashton Kutcher should just do his thing on Punk'd, and Katherine Heigl should stick to her TV series. Because neither belong on the big screen. So only watch this if you're a fan of either.

A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

Oh God!

[1/10 · 31 January 2011]

What happened to honoring masterpieces? This was seriously the worse remake of any movie I have ever seen, even the Herbie remake was better than this piece of (incoming profanity). You know how Freddy steals the picture with his charismatic and funny personality? Yeah, not in this one. You know how you love to travel in the nightmares with Mr. Kruger? Yeah, not in this one. The only positive thing in this movie is how it's up-to-date with what we use to stay awake with.

Poor acting resembling a low budget B-movie from 1980. Freddy has absolutely no charisma, he's just nasty, as child molester nasty. Only thing you can do to like this movie just a little bit, is laugh at the bad moments and make fun of Freddy and the way the whole movie develops. There is no character development worth speaking about, because you never actually get to know any of the characters as we do in the original movies. Have you seen "Boogie Man"? That's better than this cow manure! Do yourself a favor and deviate from watching this, you will doubt whether or not directors and writers like making movies, or if they just wanna make a quick buck! "Sorry Mr. Craven, on behalf of the directors and writers of this disrespectful attempt to honor your masterpiece".

Identity (2003)

Great, Great, Great!

[9/10 · 31 January 2011]

Do you like to get confused watching movies, and do you like guessing what's gonna happen next? Then this is the movie for you, you will get confused by not being able to guess the next scene. I watched this movie on TV, and had to go rent it the following weekend just to really understand what happened.

It's a movie you have to keep your eyes on at all times, actually you want to keep your eyes on it at all times. It's a roller-coaster ride at its finest. Lot of suspense, lots of twists and turns that will have you stunned an hour after watching it. This movie opened eyes of the writers of other great movies (which I can't mention). All there's left to say is, that if you like surprises, this movie will not disappoint you.

I Spit on Your Grave (2010)

Too Hyped!

[8/10 · 31 January 2011]

I came to IMDb and read a user review about this movie, the person said it to be on the level with Cannibal Holocaust, that could be true if you have a weak stomach. In my case, however, I do not think so. Should be mentioned I have never seen the original version, and found the plot to having been seen many times before. So perhaps if you have seen the original, you will like this more than if you haven't seen it.

The acting is top-notch. I, however, found the movie to be going a bit too slow. I was waiting for the action to start, which took longer than I anticipated. The first 15min, I was excited and on my toes, but after that the excitement slowly diminished. In my opinion the best moment of the movie was the last 15-20min.

If the movie hadn't been so hyped I would have written a better review, but as it stands, I cannot do that. My advice to those of you who haven't seen the original, do not expect greatness, instead, have no opinion before watching it and make up your mind after watching it. I will watch this movie again in 6months time and hopefully I will like it better then, because it is a good movie.