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Reviews
Love to the Rescue (2019)
I think I liked it
Good acting, wonderful chemistry between the leads (although Nikki looked WAY older than the Love Interest. Can you do a better job with that, Hallmark?), and any story where an animal is rescued is tops. But honestly, we were all SO distracted by the little girl's protruding ears that I'm not really sure what happened plot-wise. There was one part where "Sophia" was sitting in the park and the sun was back-lighting her ear cartilage and they looked like two enormous red stoplights. Poor kid. I hope her parents spring for the ear pinning surgery soon. It's not that expensive and it's very safe. Other than that, I'm pretty sure it was another feel-good and wholesome Hallmark movie.
The Accountant (2016)
I love this movie. Don't look for the holes in it; just enjoy it.
I watch this at least twice a year. If you're not too anal about things that make perfect sense, you will enjoy this movie. One thing: I rewatched this on tv the other night, and they did a LOT of heavy editing so they could insert all those awesome and helpful commercials. Wasn't there a part in the uncut version where the Ben Affleck character pays off the old couple's mortgage on the farm? Am I just dreaming? If the writers didn't include that, they should have.
Love at Sea (2018)
Gives seasickness a whole new meaning
Get your kidney-shaped vomit basin ready! Love at Sea? More like Sick at Sea.
Hallmark, are Carlos and Alexa volunteering? --- because that would be the only semi-valid reason they keep getting acting gigs. I'm sure they're wonderful people but acting is not their strength. If they must be in a movie due to studio politics, then keep their dialogue to "Welcome aboard!", "Watch your step!" and "Hope you enjoy your cruise." Leads in a movie? I don't think so.
Looking at how low everyone rated this movie, how does it come up with 5.6 stars? From what I could determine, only one person gave it higher than a 2 and that was Alexa's mom, so it should be thrown overboard.
And I must mention how I did not enjoy Audrey Landers. That woman can't act either. And she's got to be way older than 63. Come on! She was old when I was a little kid and the original Dallas was on TV! Also, was she told to channel Marilyn Monroe in this role? Didn't work.
This movie should be shown to all prospective and current cruise directors, with the caveat that if this is how they perform their job, they will immediately be made to walk the plank. Which brings me to a gross error in this movie: cruise directors are never alone---they have a underling or three with them at all times, ready to carry out their orders, in addition to the fact that they have no time to socialize with anybody.
Did I enjoy anything about Love at Sea? Of course. The cruise ship setting was nice. I loved some of the ocean shots (probably stock footage). Carlos has a pretty decent voice so I enjoyed his song. I like that it was only 88 minutes. Wes' Mystery Companion did a nice job. Yes, I could have turned it off but I kept hoping that the real actors would come on and fix everything.
Hallmark, my family and I love most of your movies. My DVR is full of ones that we've yet to see. We will spend hours on snowy weekends this winter enjoying these, so please don't give up. Love at Sea, however, missed the boat. In fact, it was pretty shippy.
The Endless (2017)
I enjoyed this movie but I have SO Many Questions!
Wasn't sure I was going to like this---it started off pretty slow. Husband fell asleep pretty quickly but don't read a lot into that: he falls asleep during loud war scenes at the movie theater, too. I thought that Jason and Aaron did a decent job of acting---better than I could do, for sure. Just some holes in the plot that maybe other viewers could fill but I couldn't. I guess I like things nice and neat at the end. Example: these boys grew up there, at this commune that is in an endless loop. While they were visiting, the time frame that they had until they were caught in a loop and would never be able to leave was when those three moons were full. So, why weren't they ever caught in a loop when they were living there for years??? Another: they knew they only had a day before the moons were full. Why weren't they hurrying the hell up? Food: where were the groceries coming from? Did the Deity allow them off the commune to go to the market? What did Justin see at the bottom of the lake? He looked terrified when he came up. He's not going to look that way because he saw a metal box, so what was down there? When Justin went to the Gun Tweaker's cabin and saw Mike there, why didn't he say to Mike immediately upon realizing who he was, "Hey! Your wife is looking for you! She's staying at the commune hoping to find you!." If the Deity allows them off the grounds to go to the market and to sell their beer, won't he let Mike hike up the hill a bit to see his wife? Were all the loops different lengths? Why did some have long ones and some have shorter ones? And more questions that I can't think of right now. My Big Thought this morning is: what if this is merely Justin and Aaron's loop??? Hmmmm.
Mysteries of the Abandoned (2017)
Why SO LOUD???????
I really want to watch this show! BUT I CAN'T! Why? Because the background music is not in the background --- it's in the foreground and it drowns out all the dialogue! I don't understand why they don't turn the music down or OFF! It's really distracting anyway. It enhances nothing. Am I the only one who has this issue???? Downstairs I use the captions, but upstairs our tv doesn't get captions, so any of the Discovery or Science channels that do this same stupid "loud music during the whole show" thing forces me to surf on by. PLEASE turn the music down!
Christmas at Pemberley Manor (2018)
Sometimes things are so bad you need to speak up
I love most of the Christmas Hallmark movies. Every now and then, one of them is a dud. Christmas at Pemberley Manor was a dud for me.
Jessica Lowndes (main character Elizabeth Bennet) is not easy to watch nor listen to. She's not totally unattractive but if you look at her for too long, you start to get uneasy. I look away for a second and then I'm ok, but when you couple that with her annoyingly monotone and very fast speaking voice, I just couldn't handle it. Every line she delivered was in exactly the same tone, speed (too fast!), cadence, and expression. I think she maybe should be "behind the scenes" like her character in the movie preferred to be. Maybe she needs more acting classes?? Maybe acting isn't her thing? It's not for everyone.
I liked Michael Rady. I'd love to see him in more roles with better actresses. He was very believable and likable and easy on the eyes. I think he can easily become the number one Hallmark Hearthrob.
The relationship between Elizabeth and Darcy seemed very unnatural. The dialogue was stilted and forced and almost high-school level---way too silly for a couple obviously in their mid 30s.
The story was the typical Hallmark plot. We always enjoy predicting the outcome and we are usually right. The movies always have the Love Interest, the Supportive Best Friend, the Evil Boss, a Helpful Assistant, and there's always a festival of some sort. This one was no different, but I WAS surprised by what Kristopher turned out to be; none of us saw that twist coming. That definitely turned on the ridiculous radar. Nothing wrong with that, but there was nothing else indicating that this was going to be a "magical" movie so it seemed a bit jarring and out of place.
The house they used for Pemberley Manor was gorgeous. What a stunning piece of architecture. It's a house made for Christmas.
Thank you for the effort, Hallmark. I appreciate it. This one missed the mark for me, however.
Overboard (2018)
Just So Frackin' Awkward
I have NOT seen the 1987 version because I don't like Goldie Hawn. I also stay away from Rosie O'Donnell films because of her 2003 comment about "Only liars get cancer." Done with her after that. Anywho, I can't quite put my finger on why this movie sucked. Oh, wait, yes I can. Because the actors were pretty much all miscast. Eva Longoria as the friend? No. All wrong. Anna Farris? No. Eugenio Derbez? Never heard of him and he seems way too effeminate for the love interest part he was supposed to play. None of the actors jelled with each other. The most enjoyable part was the last 10 minutes. Everything up to that felt awkward --- like when you run into someone you don't really like but you have to say hi? And you stand there an can't think of anything else to say? I'm going to watch the original Overboard later today. I'll try to overlook the Goldie Hawn aspect and see if I like it better than this version. I am SURE I will.
The Christmas Blessing (2005)
The Christmas "Spreader of Incorrect Information"
OK. When a movie is REALLY bad, I don't watch the whole thing. My threshold for bad movies is usually about 10 minutes---that's all I can take before I vomit, and that's a mess so I try to avoid that. I did watch this entire movie, so that's a plus. My fist suggestion: fire whoever did the casting for this movie. Neil Patrick Harris' "dad" looked younger than he did. Neil Patrick Harris' girlfriend looked way older than he did. Rob Lowe's character looked younger than Neil P. Harris'. Lydia, Neil's dad's girlfriend, looked way older than Neil's dad. The only person who was cast well was Angus T. Jones as Charlie. He looked the correct age. His "dad" looked more like his grandpa, however. Again, fire that caster. Cinco de Mayo is NOT Mexican Independence Day. You have just spread another round of incorrect information that thousands will now be sharing and it results in an entire generation remaining ignorant. Cinco de Mayo was merely a battle. Mex. Ind. Day is September 16. Another point: when Neil P. Harris gets to the hospital and sees the boy that had been in the accident on the gurney, a gift falls out of the boy's pocket. Neil picks it up and puts it in his own pocket, and then we never see that gift again. Was something cut out of the movie? They made such a point of him picking it up that I felt sure it contained something important that we would see again. Not so. Cutting room floor? The writing could have been tighter. Such flawless and witty repartee does not come out of normal people's mouths. No one stuttered, no one cleared their throat, no one made a mistake. Unbelievable. My husband said it's the only "feel-good" Christmas movie he's ever seen that left him not "feeling good"---the child dies in the end. No blessing there! My husband was so depressed. It was exhausting to try to cheer him up. The movie was filmed well---it didn't have that "cheesy" look and feel that so many budget movies have. It also obviously did not have a boiler-plate plot, and the settings were very pretty. Again, this movie was not awful, but it could have been so much better had the producers done a better job with casting, more believable writing, and maybe a happy ending for everyone. Charlie's dad got no blessing, and he's the one that gave up the most.
The Road (2009)
After a while of this movie, I wanted to commit suicide, too
Thank goodness we rented this movie and only blew $2.60 and not $20 for both of us. It started out kind of interesting, so I stayed put. Then I got soooo bored. I decided to stay until the end to see if it got any better. It didn't. It was just more of the same. "Are we the good guys, Daddy?" "Yes, we are," etc. etc. Question: until they found a bomb shelter full of food, what were they eating---dirt? And WHY would they leave a bomb shelter FULL OF FOOD and BEDS? Why? My husband and I disagree about the ending. He thinks the family was real. I think they were all a hallucination. (Come on, that family would have EATEN that dog a long time ago! And what did the dog eat???). Remember when the dad said "Bad dreams are normal. It's when you start having good dreams that you're in trouble." I think that was just a good dream. It made no sense otherwise. Why would a family decide to follow them? To eat them, yes, but just for fun?? And why would they be willing to take on another mouth to feed? No, I think the boy was dreaming. Do yourself a favor and skip this downer of a movie.
Låt den rätte komma in (2008)
I don't ever want to visit Sweden
What a depressing, interesting, thought-provoking movie. Not big thoughts---just thoughts. I saw this last night after waiting and waiting for it to get to my video store, and since viewing it, I can't stop thinking about it. It makes me so sad to think that the little boy Oskar is going to eventually be the pathetic old man that was Eli's "father" in the movie. The "father" was once young and virile and, since only human, he aged and weakened, whereas of course Eli did not. What a wasted life. I loved this movie; my husband hated it. And what a waste that was when Eli's father killed that young man in the beginning to drain his blood for Eli, and then he had to leave him there to avoid being caught. The young man was killed for nothing---Eli didn't even get a meal out of him. Isn't that a horrible way to think? But it's kind of like when someone kills a deer: if the deer at least provides a family with sustenance, it has a purpose. If the deer is just killed for no other reason than sport, it loses any dignity and purpose. Am I twisted? So is the movie---a little.