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Freaks and Geeks: The Little Things (2000)
Season 1, Episode 17
8/10
Freaks and Geeks, Episode 17 titled The Little Things...
10 February 2007
Before watching this brilliantly insane episode, go here ---

http://www.harpers.org/DontHaveACowMan.html

and read that website from top to bottom. Freaks and Geeks, this episode is a Judd Apatow reel! Mr Apatow is putting irony and wit into US comedy that's so sharp it could slice every blade of grass in your lawn by exactly half! Respect to the man whom a few years ago now, made it possible for The Larry Sanders Show to stay on the air. Larry was the Spinal Tap of television. I'm sure, as with anyone who caught this show, I don't need to say it was nothing short of genius. And in regard to the above website where Judd Apatow becomes 'Artie' and Mark Brazill becomes that 'corporate cock sucking network exec' who came from upstairs to regurgitate the same 'sickly crap' over and over until all you had on your hands was a smelly office and dud sitcom to clean up!

It's also worth noting that this episode in question of The Larry Sanders Show is the one when Artie lands 'one' on the networks hound face, literally. Knocking em for 6. Mark Brazill (among many others) fell uncomfortably in the late 90's and are all being nursed back to health by Domino's Pizza sponcerers, Walmart and KFC... But, the jokes on him. He would never get them to deliver to the place, far away, where is career currently is...on the Third Rock From the Sun!

Hollywood vs all the Jud Apatow's...

"Rip Torn is my Dad"
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Severance (2006)
7/10
Now the screaming starts...
4 December 2006
Not since all those buckets of blood spilt by Hammer Horror has British Horror looked so strong. Edgar Wright, Neil Marshall and now Christopher Smith have not just 'put it' to British cinema in general with the likes of Shaun of the Dead, The Descent and Severence, they have put it to the US where the once strong horror factory of Hollywood churned out hit after hit. Now, at a time when nothing ORIGINAL comes from them and their horror movies fall from the mouths of a dying fish... it seems Britain is getting back up on their feet after being face down in the mud since the Hammer House collapse in the mid 70's. I'm so relieved, it's been a long while since I was this happy. Three great movies (admittedly some other British horror's have disappointed me... Evil Aliens and especially Wilderness would account for that. But I cannot over-estimate just how fresh Severence truly was to British horror. Great cast, great blood, genuine flashes of genius from Smith from German Expressionism to Beyond the Valley of the Ultra Vixens homages... Yes... and this is British cinema!

I've reserved a ticket for the British horror revival. Sam Raimi spirit isn't dead, it's crossed the pond and we have it, you guys can keep SAW 9: Instruments of a Tortured Script... or remakes of Don't Look Now starring Paris Hilton.

Angela Pleasance in SYMPTOMS... damn it... I want to find this movie!
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I remember coming across this story on the internet
21 November 2006
If I remember correctly the guys who created the website would often drive out the booth in the middle of nowhere and spend a weekend camping by the phone waiting for it to ring. At first nobody seemed to ring the phone, but once they set up a website on the net they posted the number and from then on when they were camped out the phone would ring from all around the world. They post pictures on the site of them waiting for the phone to ring. They even made a recording of some of the conversations they had from the telephone with different people around the world. What was strange is that the phone company use to service this booth on a regular basis, even before anybody would seem to be using it. I have just seen the trailer and I must say the film looks very interesting. It's a pleasant surprise to see Steve Guttenberg is attached to this project. I have always liked this guy and he has sorely been missed from the big screen. I for one with be checking this movie out when it is released here in the UK. Keep an eye on this one folks, I think it's going to be a classic.
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1/10
Remember the board game Mousetrap?
17 November 2006
Mousetrap, for those to young to remember... (basically the target audience of this Hollywood drivel) was a game in which you set a trap in motion to capture the mouse. A sort of Domino effect of plastic gadgets that once set in motion would trigger the trap to capture the mouse. Well here it is on the big screen, the two main differences being the plastic gadgets have been replaced by million $$$ CGI and ludicrous set pieces, and the mouse replaced by American teenage actors who I couldn't give a damn about. Simply put, utter drivel from the start to the finish. Basically Moutsetrap 3... die little mousey. This sums up Hollywood horror today, a chain of endless Tish that once set in motion has never ended. Just wish they could bag the mouse and move onto something of substance. The Hollywood studio system was once like a roller-coaster itself. But life imitating art with a film like Final Destination 3, proves for sure, that there ride is definitely over!
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Widow Blue! (1970)
6/10
"What was that noise"?
29 January 2006
Warning: Spoilers
When it was released, Sex Psycho wouldn't have been for everyone tastes even in the Grindhouse circuit. It could still be considered not to everyone's taste of the usual sexploitation / exploitation / Grindhouse / drive in / porn / themes. What Sex Psycho is, is simply uncategorisable within any one of these genres. Director Walt Davis goes about making sure his film sits firmly on the outside of the fence, thus explaining why his first movie was never screened officially in cinemas or on video. Which is such a shame because in contains all those elements from the above genres and brings some new ones to the proceedings as well. Homosexuality, necrophilia, incest, murder, adultery are some of the running themes looked at here. With the inclusion of the scenes of homosexuality, this would have simply caused the film to fail to get distribution among its much-deserved audience. As a porn film it doesn't fit into, traditionally, that category for mainstream pornography. Homosexuality and straight sex rarely feature together in any porn movie... both aim to reach two separate audiences. There are some exceptions to this underwritten rule, see for example the excellent porn classic 'The Opening of Misty Beethoven' directed by the master Radley Metzger (aka Henry Paris) or even his wonderfully, sexually liberating classic 'Score'. But I'm getting way ahead of myself... Sex Psycho was made several years before these movies and before hardcore pornography had become mainstream in cinemas. For that reason alone I respect Walt Davis and his unflinching stance at directing this mini classic and attempting to break down the barriers of porn before they even existed! That's right, Walt Davis was simply a porn pioneer attempting to pave the way forward for the genre. But of course, at the time, his values would have been the films downfall. As for many of the other themes mentioned above, they are wonderfully apt for this type of movie. Bad taste is prominent throughout it's running time, the 16mm film stock looks like it was stored in an open can, next to the spare wheel in the boot of Walt's car for a year before production. And the dialogue is just simply wonderful to the ears... In one of my two favourite scenes, Walt can be heard directing our two actors sex scene off camera! When they fluff their lines by talking over each other, Walt ask's them to say their lines again... then looking directly into the camera, exclaims for the second time "What was that noise"? I loved it!!! The other is simply the inclusion of the sorcerers apprentice musical score... played, hysterically during the scene when the couple are shagging on the same bed as the recently 'throat hacked' and departed husband. And then, if standards weren't low enough, I shall forever have a flashback, when watching Fantasia, of the woman, while having sex, leans over and gives her murdered husband a blow job exclaiming, to the distaste of her partner... "Well he couldn't keep it hard when he was alive!!!? Pure brilliance. I'm so thankful that this movie didn't get an official release because, one thing is for sure, that wonderful score would have not been included! Did Disney just say "TREASON!" This was the first Walt Davis film I have watched and I am looking forward to seeing other films offered by a director that, here, shows great promise and just what he is capable of creating. What follows, I'm sure, will be a more competent attempt allowing his mini masterpieces of bad taste a chance to find their rightful audience.
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8/10
"Hey Gentlemen!"
4 July 2005
What a truly wonderful discovery and surprise. Lucio Fulci is best know in the genre of horror, I must admit to not being one of his biggest fans, his movies lack consistency, his earlier work outweighs, by far, his later work. But even the films regarded by his fans, The Beyond, Zombie Flesh Eaters etc. are severely overrated. Before I saw his Spaghetti Western Tempo di massacro (Massacre Time) I was impressed more by his earlier work, Don't Torture a Duckling for a perfect example of Giallo cinema. It all changed when I caught this truly outstanding cinematic experience...Tempo di massacro. From the excellent original Morricone' esquire score by Coriolano Gori to fantastic action sequences that obviously inspired John Woo's narrative traits (complete with flying 'slow mo' doves) The consistently great Franco Nero here gives an adequate performance (mirroring Eastwood's on screen presence) pairing perfectly with his on screen brother George Hilton who steals many of the films greatest lines from him. But the highlight of the film, by far, is the absolutely fantastic and mesmerising performance of Nino Castelnuovo playing the sinister whip brandishing Junior. Castelnuovo's performance lights up the screen here in a way rarely has been seen in cinema (for me Castlenuovo is one of the best character actors in Italian cinema with career defining leaps in so many genres ranging from comedy, horror, romance, erotica, western, sci-fi and drama) From the fantastic 'whipping' scene to the organ-playing scene... Nino Castelnuovo steals every moment on screen... and considering Franco Nero is in this that is by no means an easy achievement!

Just check this cinematic classic out...I have no doubt in saying that in a few more years, this will be seen as a true classic of the genre and will finally be given the respect and audience it so rightly deserves. Lucio Fulci's finest work! A MUST SEE!

Much more than just sixties exploitation cinema. I don't use this word lightly... it's a masterpiece of sixties cinema.
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10/10
Beautiful cinematography and exquisit sensuality, Amazing
7 August 2003
With the sexual revolution of the 1960's in full swing, along came Euro Erotica master, director Radley Metzger. With films like Therese and Isabelle (1968) and Camille (1969) and his next project The Lickerish Quartet (1970) he's left his directional style of sensuality and erotica, a lavishness imagery with a brilliance for framing the exquisite beauty not just of the actors but as in The Lickerish Quartet especially, the beauty of the location. The sexual power that flows from the gorgeous Silvana Venturelli, not only ignites the screen but burns the very celluloid of the print. This film oozes provocatively forward all the while presenting a playfulness, and free exhibit of the time of the sexual revolution. I have only just discovered this director and have so far seen only four of his movies (this one, Camille 2000, The Private Afternoons of Pamala Man 1975 and The Opening of Misty Beethoven, 1976) The last two movies in this list were the ones Radley Metzger made in the US under the name Henry Paris and where I believe to be his most successful (at the box office) Both were hard versions and the later Misty Beethoven is heavily regarded by filmmaker Paul Thomas Anderson the director of Boogie Nights as his favourite Adult movie of all time, I can see many of the same characteristics of this film in The Lickerish Quartet. I myself am doing my final year dissertation on the rise of European Erotica from the late 60's to the late 70's, and the decline of these films after the 80's. With directors such as Radley Metzger and another favourite of mine, José Ramón Larraz (Vampyres, The Coming of Sin) I truly know that I am witnessing the very best that this genre has too offer. My only wish is for these movies and others like them should all receive a screening again today in as many cinemas around the world as possible to reawaken a sensuality that is long dead and dormant in most movies today. This movie captures the time, the feeling, and the energy of this genre and most of all it captured me. Thank you
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9/10
Unlike Slyvester the cat, Revenge IS sweet
28 January 2003
Tweetie Pie was one lucky little yellow canary, if only Slyvester had called Tabitha over for a holiday, Tweety would have stood no chance! Great treasure of a movie this one. Have just watched this film and it ended just minutes ago and I wanted to come on and say what a great atmospheric horror we have here. A true classic. As I and my fellow student mate sat up and watched this we both agreed that it was truely superb. Theres plenty of thrills, chills and fun to be had and I must also just add that as a massive cat lover I especially enjoyed it. A Great British classic to be discovered that I insist you search for.

Enjoy

PS Whats the matter, cat got your tongue!
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