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American Auto (2021)
It's a garbage fire.
So bad it's almost a new art form. It's as if you took the Office, beat it into a coma with Superstore and wrapped it up in a steaming pile of medical waste that is SNL. It would be funnier if the writers and cast committed seppuku and they filmed that. I hope it runs for 25 seasons and wins every award as an emblem of the chemical warfare on orphans that NBC has always wanted to be.
It's a Wonderful Life (1946)
This is about Tubi's version
The maniacs at Tubi deleted the entire section where George sees the town as if he never existed. They cut AN HOUR out of the movie. It's ruined. Complete waste of time. The movie makes no sense. Its now garbage.
The Blacklist: Nachalo (2021)
Worst television episode evah
This what all writing programs tell you what not to do when creating a script. Having ghosts stand around dictating their story lines. This is beyond lazy writing. They must have scribbled down some notes and outsourced it to their kids. Only explanation.
It's just wallpaper and background noise at this point
The series is the same stupid episode week after week after week. The funny part is that this is a government program costing a fortune, getting people killed and accomplishing nothing. This should have been a series about Clark at the DMV. It's hopeless. And btw how many times does a guy have to get shot to be a retired FBI agent? Seriously wouldn't they force Ressler out at some point? What's his health insurance cost? $90,000 a month?
I watched this back to back with the previous ep
L&O/SVU really doesn't portray women in a good light. All mothers are psychos cranked up to a million. Like off the scale mental cases who are ready willing and able to murder the entire planet to keep their baby close even if their baby is in the other room. On the one hand we have Olivia who, yeah, wants to kill all men. On the other we have Joan Crawford.
The Return (2006)
The most boring thriller in the history of movies
It's just dull dull dull dull. Random things happen, you don't know why. Scenes randomly follow one after the other with nothing to link them together. And by the way there are maybe 100 words of dialog in the whole movie.
Midnight Mass (2021)
Nothing happens and no one cares
Hour after hour nothing happens except long long long monologues on piety and faith. Otherwise it's really just a look into the boring goings on in a small isolated fishing village where everyone knows everyone else's business and there's tons of petty and not so petty grievances. And occasional monsters or something.
The Blacklist (2013)
Entire nations are destroyed to save Elizabeth Keen
Frankly the damsel in distress schtick gets very old very fast. You have to understand that Blacklist isn't a crime show or an action show. It's a SAVE THE CHEERLEADER show. That's the sum if it. Nations are destroyed, governments toppled, every single man, woman and child on earth are thrown at a single objective; Rescue Elizabeth Keen. Every episode the combined might of the 3 or 4 largest armies in the world are sent to kill Elizabeth Keen and she must be rescued. So she can utterly refuse to hide herself or change her life in any way. Nope. Better we kill 50 to 100 people each week while extricating her from the clutches of eeeeevulll!
The Truth About Charlie (2002)
In retrospect, a horrible over use of shakey cam.
It detracts and distracts from the movie badly. You can never get very invested in the movie. Staring into the camera is also badly over used. In fact all the editing is wildly frenetic. Not sure what they were going for there.
Also why does Tim Roth affect a speech impediment?
Red Joan (2018)
It's not a spy movie
If you're looking for a spy movie or a wartime movie or a Cold War movie, you'll be unhappy. The movie is actually an endless stream of Joan and various men, their faces inches from each other whispering pronouncements of love to each other. And occasionally Joan gets angry and slaps someone.
Out of Death (2021)
Every single second filled with county music and classic rock
Luckily there's almost no dialog in the movie so you can savor every moment of the soundtrack. But as to the movie it's very simple. The entire movie is bad cops chasing a woman through the woods and mud. That's it. There's no beginning middle or end.
Into the Dark: Treehouse (2019)
Every single Jimmi Simpson character is the same character
Not that he plays that character badly, it's just that it's 100% the same guy in everything he's ever done. I think even most of the dialog is the same. I can't be the only person who sees this.
This is crap
Everything is terrible from the acting to the writing to the lighting and sound. The camera work is insane. Random scenes of birds in the park and blank walls. Some shots out of focus for no reason. And everything is handheld shaky. There's even a problem with the video camera being unable to keep up with movement like the buffer is overloading. It's straight trash.
Medium: The One Behind the Wheel (2007)
The unending jazz tune every second was great
Especially since it's a boring two note tune that goes on and on and on and on. And on and on and on. And on. And on.
A Little Help (2010)
Another dysfunctional family get together move
Number 347. Another big angry messed up uppermiddle class white family that gets together solely for the purpose of screaming at each other movie. It's great background noise.
Genuinely intolerable people
There a not a single character in this movie who's not despicable. They're all selfish abrasive narcissists. Especially Tomlin whose character not only treats people like objects, she has an almost paranoid sense of self grandeur. For all her screaming about helping others she helps only herself. If this is feminist empowerment I didn't get the memo.
Close to Home (2005)
SVU 2.0 with headlines ripped the news, etc.
Two angry women prosecutors switch sides to defend women from the evil men in the world. Every ep they yell and scream and fight with their bosses over how they don't do their jobs. In the meantime EVERY man in their office demands they purjure themselves EVERY ep.
Will no one mention there is almost zero dialog
For a 2 1/2 hr flick there's maybe 300 spoken words of dialog. The other 98% is mood music. I don't think there was a single spoken word in the first 45 minutes. In fact the female lead character is rendered mute. There's got to be more to a movie than sad slow piano music.
The Affair of the Necklace (2001)
Worst sound editing evah
Between the utterly overwhelming score that fills every second at top volume, endless background noise especially crowd noise, and the barely audible dialog, this has to rank as the worst sound editing in the history of talkies. The composer and the foley guy are criminals.
Los favoritos de Midas (2020)
Boring as hell
Slow as molasses and boring as hell. Nothing happens except some rich dude's midlife crisis with a hot employee. Basically a defense for Antifa inspired anarchist violence. Even 6 eps are far too many
Elizabeth Harvest (2018)
Worst sound engineering in the history of movies. There is no way to actually hear what they're saying. All the actors mumble and mutter underneath a blaring music track or weird sound effects. I guess if you want to turn on the subtitles and read the movie you can have at it.
Dumbest episode ever
Even for this show this is insane. All you have to do is cry rape and Olivia Benson will excuse you for murder three counts of assault and kidnapping and torture.
De Twaalf (2019)
Omg sooo stupid
The Belgian legal system if this is even a semi accurate representation, is hopelessly broken. Don't ever get arrested in Belgium because they will prosecute you with nothing more than childish feelings. Evidence, facts, reality even adult behavior are totally out the window. This show is incredibly stupid slow and boring.
Ofrenda a la tormenta (2020)
It never seems to end
There's a mess of subplots and side plots so that most of the movie is filler for the central story. 2hrs 20 is a long slog for a pretty simple story if they just stuck to it but they have to drag along so much. Keep in mind also she's a terrible detective who does almost no detective work.
Medical Police (2020)
Not funny not smart not interesting not cute. Just cringe worthy as if they made a show so obnoxious they dare you to watch. And they fail at that. It's awful