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Reviews
The Acolyte: Destiny (2024)
It was so bad it was entertaining!
Clearly the people writing this series have little interest in Star Wars, or have any fundamental understanding of it. Beyond that the elements of this story were so bad, they were actually funny.
Fire - As far as I'm aware, FIRE DOESN"T BURN STONE, unless extremely, extremely hot. Lets ignore the first episode where a FIRE IN SPACE had to be extinguished (space fire is different?), this fire not only burns on stone, but SPREADS quickly through a building inside of a mountain. It burns faster than paper apparently as all died within about 1 minute. Lol!
Threads - The force is just magic threads now, lol. I get the attempt to take it somewhere new, but this was trying to rewrite the previous 40+ years of the force lore.
Anyway long story short, this was so bad it was entertaining! Clearly the writers care little about Star Wars, it has very little to do with it. There's actually very little to do with Star Wars in this series, other than the branding.
Finally, let's look up the definition of the word Acolyte, "one who assists a member of the clergy in a liturgical service by performing minor duties." Yup that sums up the show. Performing minor duties.
Who greenlit this one? Did anyone actually watch these episodes, other than the creators, before they were released?
The Acolyte (2024)
Its not bad, but its not good.
It is, MEH.
The story is lackluster, slow and predictable. The acting is flat and lacks emotion. The characters have surface level of depth and interest.
Therefore, it must be the toxic fanbase. It must be the male fans, who won't accept change. It can't be any other reason, other than the fans.
Or, perhaps its that Star Wars, at its core, has always been about a good story. Special effects were good, but the story is what carried it all. Add depth and development to the characters, and this is why it worked.
Nope, must be the toxic fanbase. Not the fact that this series is slow, tries to be action packed, when the action is flat, and does little to make the characters interesting in the least. After two episodes, what are their names again?
This story had a wonderful opportunity to set the time and place a long before all the known characters, and present us a time/space that was unique all to itself. So far, it doesn't do that. Its just someone killing someone, and an investigation and cat and mouse chase....oh wait a second. That's nearly every Star Wars TV Series so far, and a story cliché done over and over again.
To be clear, toxic fanbase talk is nonsense. Give us a good story, with good characters, and you'll get a great response. Fans are eager to love the new Star Wars, but most of the creations have been lack-luster at best. Rogue One was excellent. Mandalorian S1 & S2 were perfect, S3 (jumped a shark). Book of Boba, started good and a wheel fell off. Kenobi, redeemed itself at the end. Asoka....space whales & witches? The story was decent, but had a bizzare and pointless resolution to the series. Andor, started slow and became really good. This one, two episodes in and I think I know one character name. Acting was one-dimensional (except for "Jason" from the Good Place), and, none of it engaging.
But I digress. Two episodes in, and I'll likely try one more. But so far, this series will push more old fans away, sorry we've supported SW for so long now, and will do very little to entice new fans.
Unfrosted (2024)
Surprised at the reviews. This was so well done!
1) I'm not a bot.
2) I don't work for any media company, or have any vested interest in this having a good review.
3) I am of sound mind and body, though I've had a couple of drinks. =)
Unfrosted was really well done! The humor both subtle and clever all at once. A great comedic piece that will undoubtedly become a classic in time.
Reimaging the Cuban missile crisis, is classic! Bill Burr knocked his role out of the park! The way the disgruntled mascots come together, was both hilarious and such an awesome jab at culture, politics and the climate, without picking a side. It was just funny! All the side players that made up the cast of characters, was fantastic. I loved the Walter Cronkite portrayal too. Poking fun at the most venerated newsman of all time, in both a respectful and really funny way.
I think if anyone is giving this a lower review, its because they don't understand the references presented. It's a wonderful playup of the '60s culture, which clearly it's set in.
I really enjoyed it. And that's the way it is!
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
Providing a review only so Disney can really think about future SW films.
Okay lifelong SW fan here. The new trilogy should not have been made.
This film was the "jump the shark" moment. Palpatine is back. No explanation as to the how or why. Horses in space? A star destroyer assault, using horses, while the ship was in flight? Huh? Dramatic moments, rolled backwards. It was really just a shiny film. Looked good, sounded good, but the story was poor. At some point Disney may realize that its all about the story. The original trilogy, had a wonderful story arc, as did the prequels. The prequels veered off at times, but brought it all back together in the end, as one large cohesive story. This movie, summed up the disjointed writing of the sequel series. All the cameo's in the world can't save it. The actors and actresses were fine. The lazy writing was not. It failed to explain how or why Palpatine was able to come back from the dead....kind of a big thing. It had magic Jedi training with Leia and Rey between films, though Rey sought Luke for training and he just force vaporized in the last film. Anyway I digress. The acting was just fine. The story was poor. Fix the stories Disney, please fix them.
Out of all the Disney movies, Rogue One was the best, by far. It had the flavor of an actual Star Wars film, and it had a good story. Fans are tired of being berated that we don't like strong female leads, which is nonsensical. We don't like poorly written stories. We don't care whos the lead. When its agenda driven, or out to destroy characters that we all grew up with, and we reject it, it's not a toxic fanbase.
Anyway, ROS was a meh film to end another trilogy. The cast were all very capable actors, and some very good too, but without a solid story it really doesn't matter.
Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)
Does Disney watch their product before they release it?
What a good story would have been was to use the dial of density and go back in time and re-write this entire film. This was appallingly bad. Why was this even released?
I have seen all of the Indiana Jones films since the very first one, in the Theatres right from the very start. The writing and characters, with a balance of humor was always a great recipe. Raiders is still one of the best films ever, and the 3rd one was fantastic and humorous. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was okay, but still entertaining and enjoyable. This film was bland and boring. I can't even think of a moment that stands out.
It had lots of action scenes. Many of which all felt very forced and predictable, and repetitive. I honestly felt very little excitement with any of those scenes, as the story had done little to nothing to build up the "why" the action was even happening. It was just there, over and over again. It wasn't exciting, and clearly it was there to try to drive the film forward, quite literally in spots. It just was not a good film.
Harrison Ford is still a legend. It's clearly not his acting, or his age, as if you watch any other current film/show he's in, such as 1923 or Shrinking, he's absolutely fantastic, and some of his best work. There was no need to do heavy CGI and try to put him in as an action star once again. There was a need for a strong story and dialogue, that was reflective of his current self, but there was none of it present. Disney should not have greenlit this film at all, it was slow, boring and sad to see. Let's bring back a couple of other cameos for no real purpose at all, and see what they look like. They looked 20 years older than the last time we saw them.
The other actors in the film were alright. The kid, I didn't understand the purpose of, other than to jam a kid into the film. Their stories and character development was also missing, so they were just there leading the charge, while Indy seemed to take a back seat throughout his own adventure. Really?
Am I surprised? No. I'm not a Disney hater. I'm still subscribed. But their writing quality for all things Lucasfilm, has been pure garbage. Now they have done same to Indy. They need to go back to the basics, as it all starts with a good story. Its never about special effects, or even the star powered cameos that you may have. It's all about a good story.
So Disney, please don't blame the fans, toxic fans, or even imaginary haters, because your stories are poor. They're just poor. You have great star power and the film sucks, its the writing. Focus on better writing.
P. S. Please stop paying people to give your garbage films and shows great reviews, so it looks better than it is. Lipstick on a pig, is still just a pig.
Ahsoka: Part Four: Fallen Jedi (2023)
Really a 7.5 but I'll give it an 8
So far I've posted so-so reviews for the show, as it's been slow moving, slow dialogue and predictable. This has been the first interesting and good episode.
The dark Jedi (?) actually have some dialogue that provide more character depth. The plot is not entirely predictable. It was interesting!
The pace of this episode is also what we were expecting from the start. I hope it continues!
Lastly though, the series, while called Ashoka, doesn't seem to be about her journey as much as Sabines. Perhaps that will change, but fans tend to get annoyed with the bait-and-switch approach to storytelling. Had they taken this approach with Andor, it would have failed. It's also why Mandalorian S3 wasn't as strong as the first two; it was not really about Mando in the end; was it.
=)
Ahsoka: Part Three: Time to Fly (2023)
The reviews?
I think I'm more confused at the rating of the show, than the show itself.
Anything that's rating over an 8, is clearly bought and paid for by Disney. This show does not YET reach an 8.... I hope it can get there. Realistically, I think its between a 6-7 (at best).
I think for all the hype this has had, it's been rather slow and predictable. Paying homage to Star Wars is one thing, but lifting lines, and scenes from it, felt less like a tribute and more like a struggle for ideas.
To leave the review on a good note, visually the show looks pretty good. But fans will always take a good story over great visuals. I hope in the end the larger story will bring it all back together.
Ahsoka (2023)
Hopefully it gets better...
So far the series is a bit flat, and predictable for the most part. The acting is okay, the writing is okay. The series overall is okay. I'll keep watching... for now.
No spoilers here, but the format and storyline is very overdone, and similar in many ways to the newest SW Trilogy; which was not good. Personally I think "spacemaps, holocrons, wayfinders" as a device to show where someone is in time and space is bizarre plot device and boring. If you wanted to hide, why would you make a map, and bury it in the sand? =P
So for the first two episodes, were okay. The first lightsaber duel was seriously bland. The second much more on par. Overall I hope the series gets more interesting. Andor was rather slow to start, but became quite good by the end. I certainly hope Ahsoka picks up too.
But here's a thought, if the series is called Ahsoka, than the focus should be on her. Seems to me much of the episodes focused on the new characters, instead of the main character that we tuned in for. That was the flaw of Obi-Wan, it never seemed to be much about him. The focus was on all the characters around him, and that was one of the reasons the fans were disappointed with it.
At any rate, who am I to review such a show? Oh wait, one of the original fans that have been around since '77. I'm all for new cast and characters along the way. But to me it's all about the story. Everything else is meaningless, if the story is not solid it won't matter just how good the effects, scenes or acting is.
Anyway, I'll keep watching for now.
Unrelated but an observation. There seems to be a TON of PLACED reviews giving 10/10 for this series, and 9/10 and so on - which is just nonsensical, and seems placed by Lucasfilm. It reminds me of the reviews of The Last Jedi, where it was being compared to The Empire Strikes Back. They were nonsensical too, and clearly planted. That was one of the worst films I've ever watched. It was the Star Trek V of the Star Wars series. ;-)