[announcing his victory speech to the world and broadcasting it
Long ago, in a distant land, I, Aku, the shapeshifting master of darkness unleashed an unspeakable evil! But a foolish samurai warrior wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time and flung him into the future where my evil is law! Now the fool seeks to return to the past and undo the future that is Aku!
NOT! Because, after all these years, I have finally captured...