Ki-taek: [to his son] You know what kind of plan never fails? No plan. No plan at all. You know why? Because life cannot be planned. Look around you. Did you think these people made a plan to sleep in the sports hall with you? But here we are now, sleeping together on the floor. So, there's no need for a plan. You can't go wrong with no plans. We don't need to make a plan for anything. It doesn't matter what will happen next. Even if the country gets destroyed or sold out, nobody cares. Got it?
Ki-taek: They are rich but still nice.
Chung-sook, Ki-taek's wife: They are nice because they are rich.
Ki-jung: Jessica, only child.
Kim Ki-woo: Dad, today I made a plan - a fundamental plan. I'm going to earn money, a lot of it. University, a career, marriage, those are all fine, but first I'll earn money. When I have money, I'll buy the house. On the day we move in, Mom and I will be in the yard. Because the sunshine is so nice there. All you'll need to do is walk up the stairs. Take care until then. So long.
Ki-taek: Rich people are naive. No resentments. No creases on them.
Chung-sook, Ki-taek's wife: It all gets ironed out. Money is an iron. Those creases all get smoothed out by money.
Ki-taek: [message to Ki-woo] Perhaps you, if no one else, will be able to read this. You were a Scout, so I'm writing this just in case. Have your injuries healed? I'm sure your mother is plenty healthy. I'm doing fine in here. Though thinking of Ki-jung makes me cry. Even now, what happened that day doesn't seem real. It feels like a dream, and yet it doesn't. That day as I went out the gate, I suddenly knew where I needed to go. A house where such a grisly thing took place would surely not be easy to sell. I've struggled to hold on in this empty house. Still, thanks to the house being empty - what was her name, Moon-gwang? - I was able to give her a proper send off. I hear treeside burials are trendy. So hell, I did my best. Those real estate sharks sure are clever. They duped some people who had just arrived in Korea and managed to sell the house. With the parents working and the kids attending school, the family is usually out. But the damned housekeeper stays here 24 hours a day. Each time I go upstairs, I take my life into my hands. And it turns out Germans eat more than just sausage and beer. What a relief. Passing the time down here, everything starts to go hazy. Today at least, I was able to write you this letter. If I send out the letter this way every night, maybe someday you'll see it. So long.
Kim Ki-woo: [narrates] Opening my eyes for the first time in a month, I saw a detective who looked nothing like a detective. Then the doctor who looked nothing like a doctor spoke. Even when I heard how much Ki-jung bled that day... even when I heard the words "forgery", "trespassing", "foul play", "murder", and that we were lucky to get away with probation... even when I finally got to see Ki-jung's face, I kept laughing. Though when I went back and watched the news reports, I didn't laugh.
Kim Ki-woo: [narrates] Actually, Mom and I had no idea where Dad was. But those detectives still wore themselves out following us. Eventually the news went quiet and after the surveillance stopped, I started going up that mountain. From up there, you have a great view of the house. That day, despite the cold. I felt like staying longer.
Moon-gwang: Don't fucking call me sis, you filthy bitch!
Kim Ki-jung: [about Moon-gwang] She may look like a sheep, but inside, she's a fox. Sometimes she acts like she owns the house.
Kim Ki-woo: Right. Of all the people in that house, she's lived there the longest. She was housekeeper to the architect Namgoong, but then she went on to work for this family. When the architect moved out, he introduced this woman to Park's family, telling them, "This is a great housekeeper, you should hire her".
Chung-sook: So she survived a change of ownership.
Kim Ki-woo: She won't give up such a good job easily.
Kim Ki-jung: To extract a woman like that, we need to prepare well.
Kim Ki-woo: Right, we need a plan.
Park Da-hye: [cut to a scene with Ki-woo and Da-hye] I want to eat peaches. I like peaches best.
Kim Ki-woo: Why not ask for some?
Park Da-hye: No peaches at our house. It's a forbidden fruit.
Kim Ki-woo: [cut back to the Kims; referring to Moon-gwang] So according to what Da-hye told me, she's got a pretty serious allergy to peaches. You know that fuzz on the peach skin? If she's anywhere near it, she gets a full body rash, has trouble breathing, asthma, a total meltdown!
[Moon-gwang falls sick after Ki-woo puts peach fuzz on her]
Ki-taek: Anyway. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop, but her words came through clearly! So I couldn't help but...
Kim Ki-woo: Cut, cut! Dad, your emotions are up to here. Bring them down to about there.
Ki-taek: So I couldn't help but overhear...
Kim Ki-woo: Keep it focused!
Ki-taek: [to Mrs. Park] What I'm trying to say is... it's just that, your housekeeper's voice is quite loud, you know?
Park Yeon-kyo: I understand, it's all right. Just tell me, okay?
Ki-taek: She said she got diagnosed with active tuberculosis and she was practically shouting over the phone, so upset she could barely control herself!
Park Yeon-kyo: Tuberculosis? Come on...
Ki-taek: It's true, she phoned someone saying she had active TB.
Kim Ki-woo: [cut back to the Kims] Dad, back in the day, people used to buy Christmas Seals, right? Feels like a bygone era.
Ki-taek: [cut back to Ki-taek and Mrs. Park] But I saw it on the internet. Korea has the #1 rate of TB of all the OECD countries.
Kim Ki-woo: [cut back to the Kims] But she's still working, as if nothing's wrong - with a kid like Da-song in the house.
Ki-taek: [cut back to Ki-taek and Mrs. Park] So you've got a young kid like Da-song in the house, and a TB patient is doing dishes, cooking, spraying spittle...
Park Yeon-kyo: Stop it, please!
[cut to the Kims putting peach fuzz on Moon-gwang, causing her to fall sick again, and Ki-taek using chili sauce to fake Moon-gwang's blood]
Ki-taek: Acting is one thing. But this family is so gullible, right?
Chung-sook: Especially the Madame.
Ki-taek: You said it. She's so naive and nice. She's rich but she's still nice.
Chung-sook: Not "Rich but still nice." Nice because she's rich, you know? Hell, if I had all this money, I'd be nice too!