Patchwork (2015) Poster

(2015)

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7/10
Allofreanimahooker.
BA_Harrison8 November 2017
A horror comedy told in eight parts, Patchwork is what you would get if you took Steven Martin's All Of Me (two souls sharing one body) and crossed it with gory '80s classic Reanimator (glowing green goop) and tongue-in-cheek horror Frankenhooker (self-brain surgery with a drill). It's like three films rolled into one: how apt!

'Part 1: Jennifer' starts the ball rolling, as we meet career woman Jennifer (Tory Stolper), who is so unlikable that no-one wants to celebrate her birthday with her. After she is left alone in a bar by her work colleagues, Jennifer returns home where she is cracked over the head by an unseen assailant.

'Part II: AWOL' sees Jennifer waking up to find that parts of her body have been combined with those of two other women—Madeleine (Maria Blasucci) and Ellie (Tracey Fairaway)—to create a single patchwork body. She also learns that she shares control of this body with both the other women.

'Part III: Ellie' shows us how blonde party girl Ellie came to be part of the threesome, while 'Part IV: Makeover' sees the girls seeking help from med-student Garrett (James Phelps) and swearing revenge on those responsible for their bizarre predicament.

'Part V: Madeleine' introduces a cool plot twist that takes the film in a new direction. Sadly, the subsequent three parts see Patchwork losing some of its steam, culminating in a rather weak ending. All told, the film has several good ideas, most of which are handled well enough, delivers decent performances, and some reasonable gore, but doesn't manage to be quite as memorable as the trio of movies it is clearly modelled after.

6.5 out of 10, rounded up to 7 for IMDb.
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7/10
If you like the work of Frank Henenlotter,
Samizdata16 September 2017
You will love this. It has the irreverent and gleeful bloodshed and the same joyous ignorance of science fact that makes all the classic horror comedies, like the Basket Case series, work, as well as the grind-house style "Whiskey Tango Foxtrot" sensibilities. Not a laugh out loud style of horror comedy, but well loaded with chuckles and appreciative groans.

Fun, and full of grue. NOT a date movie, unless your date is a fan of gallons of blood and black market medical experiments, in which case, watch away!
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8/10
Great Twist on a Classic Story
gregsrants19 October 2015
A simple trip to a local bar for three women turns into a nightmarish scenario for three young women in the new Frankenstein-esque new film Patchwork.

Jennifer, Ellie and Madeleine couldn't be more different from each other. Jennifer is the straight laced business woman who wears pantsuits. Ellie is the blonde bombshell whose naivety often gets her in trouble. And Madeleine is a quiet freakish kind of girl. But on one night the three find themselves in the same drinking establishment and before morning they will be hacked, sewn and strung together to make a single character out of the best body parts each subject had to offer.

Upon awakening on the operating table the creature that has been Frankensteined attempts to gain control of their individual joints and body parts allowing them movement. The process is harder than can be expected as each personality of each girl controls parts of the new body. But escape it does and alone with the three voices in its head, the creature attempts to put the pieces together as to how, why and most importantly, who is responsible for their horrid creation.

Directed by Tyler MacIntyre based on a script by MacIntyre and Chris Lee Hill, Patchwork is a wonderfully deviant film that is rooted in Frankenstein mythology but tips its hat to cult classics such as Re-Animator and Darkman. Actresses Tory Stolper (Jennifer), Tracey Fairaway (Ellie) and Marie Blasucci (Madeleine) are perfectly cast with spellbinding chemistry resulting in many of the film's laugh out loud moments. Stolper particularly shines and is able to transform into the patchwork creature with B-movie exuberance twitching like Vincent D'Onofrio's Edgar in Men in Black as she learns how to work her new body.

The film is equally dark and humorous. The violence is almost cartoon-like but detailed enough to ensure an R-rating. And the humor is spot on as the three girls struggle to learn about each other and work together in the same consciousness. Think of Patchwork as the horror version of Pixar's Inside Out.

Cut into various chapters which take a non-linear approach to the story the film flips back and forward in time as they introduce the characters while progressing the narrative. It's a perfect device for a film whose main character is a cut and paste creation itself.

And we could not conclude any review without commenting on the stellar make-up effects in the film. The patched female creation looked as good as any make-up effect on an Oscar winning film and should be applauded to its attention to detail.

Patchwork in playing this week and the Toronto After Dark Film Festival and I can't imagine how it will not be a fan favorite at the conclusion of its screening. It was a smart, snarky funny film and should be screened by anyone who appreciates the genre.
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8/10
indie pop splatter
re-animatresse9 November 2017
i've been feeling anxious and low on mental spoons, and i wanted a movie that doesn't require too much thought and analysis to appreciate. this feature film debut from writer/director Tyler MacIntyre is a fun, absurd horror comedy, more comedy than horror, that nicely fits the bill

three women are cut up, patched together and injected with a luminescent reanimating reagent in the style of Re-Anamitor; they awaken with a scattered memory and begin a violent rampage, to a lively indie pop soundtrack, in search of whomever did it to them

the sets and make-up are well done, and Tory Stolper gives an excellent performance as the patchwork protagonist. the cast is almost entirely white though. and does a film still pass the Bechdel test if the only dialogue between women occurs between women who all share the same body? all in all, this is no masterpiece of modern cinema, but it -is- highly entertaining and worth checking out
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9/10
Body horror with a twist is an absolute hoot
SC-202 June 2017
When is a body horror not a body horror? Maybe when the female protagonist (technically three protagonists, stitched together by a guy with a circular saw and a staple gun) is reanimated and promptly dons a practical lab coat.

Despite this being a film about body image – or maybe because of that – the camera (held by a male director) does not linger on bodies, preferring to explore minds.

It's also a hoot (at one point literally), not nearly as gory as you might imagine, and very well crafted.

I'm away to load some "rampage" music onto my iPod...
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10/10
Best in show as far as rom-com-horrors go
justinejli15 June 2017
Warning: Spoilers
"Patchwork" is hands down the best Rom-com-horror film I've ever seen. It's a bloody blend of everything that's grotesque and philosophical about Shelley's Frankenstein + campy and satirically triumphant about Scream Queens.

Setting a punchy tone and snappy pace for the film, the opening sequence cuts straight to the chase: cue sweet jazzy tunes, an unassuming guy in a lab coat whispering sweet nothings to his lover...and then bam — turns out he's flirting with the severed head of Marilyn Monroe's hotter sister from another mister.

The creators of the film have successfully hacked apart and dissected the stereotypical comedy horror film and stitched together elements from various bodies of work across film and literature to spawn Patchwork. As such, Patchwork pioneers a subgenre of film in that it is a caricature of comedy horror shows that themselves, parody bad horror films.

The basic storyline is that of a maniacal Plastic Surgeon who staples body parts from three girls (Jennifer, Ellie, and Madeline) together and brings his frankenstein creation to life with some kind of microwavable neon green potion. The Surgeon, while clearly villainous, has a very hopelessly earnest "Better Call Saul" (from Breaking Bad) way about him that makes him endearing and a character the audience can almost empathize with.

The victimized protagonists (Jennifer, Ellie) are both individually flawed and also hideously outwardly flawed in their patchwork-frankenstein form: Jennifer is a remarkably miserable and boring career woman who is sleeping with her married boss. (The boss is insufferably arrogant and has kids, which makes her the unforgivable kind of home wrecker). Ellie is a vapid, self-absorbed girl whose exaggerated valley girl persona doesn't do her any favors. And combined as "Stitch," the girls are manifested in this grotesque, mutant eyesore of a being that has the combined flaws of all three women, with deplorable table manners to boot. But this film isn't just a comedy-horror, it's also a love story about a disfigured hot chick and nerdy med school student, who find each other through the physical and emotional trials and tribulations of being total freaks.

The format of the film is compositionally brilliant and the dialogue is wickedly amusing. The animated intro sequence is reminiscent of Greek or Roman epic pottery with its hieroglyphic or caveman-esque rendition of the film's core themes (mutilation, gore, satire). Compositionally, the film is 8 parts with flashbacks in time, revenge narrative, and Greek-chorus moments with the three girls — all stitched together in a perfect cinematic tribute to such cultural masterpieces as Shelley's Frankenstein, Rocky Horror Picture Show, and Saw.

Without giving away too much more of the plot, I would also recommend this film to anyone who: 1) has recently been cheated on and wants to watch hot chicks butchering a serial cheater 2) wants to watch vapid douchebags who refuses to use the word "make" because it is too capitalist — get their skull bashed in with a metal pole. 3) wishes they could stick a knife through the brains of predatory frat guys who film women without sober consent 4) would enjoy watching Jewish guys in lab coats argue about whether eating donuts around dead bodies is sanitary and complain about how post-Reagan donuts don't have enough filling (which is, by the way, what's wrong with America.) 5) is wondering what an owl-cat looks like. 6) is a serial killer, but trying to quit cold turkey. Patchwork : serial killers :: Nicotine gum : serial smokers. Next time you feel that murderous tingle, just spin up this movie. It will visually quench your thirst for blood and de-romanticize violent crime with its hilariously blasé attitude towards homicide.
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8/10
In the vein of Frankenhooker and Reanimator
Otkon11 June 2017
Warning: Spoilers
If you enjoy absurdist horror comedy with some surprises, this is not a bad little movie. It is well-acted by a very competent cast, especially the three leads. The effects and make-up are quite convincing. The director of photography actually knew how to light a scene to fit the story-telling.
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9/10
Previous reviewers are spot-on...
gil-191-41472829 July 2017
I can't do a better job than they did, but I do want to add my two cents and say that this actually was one of the best movies I've seen in a while. The script was good, as was the acting and it was an over all fun movie- very entertaining. The tone of it at times is along the lines of 'God Bless America' wherein people that make you loathe them get their just rewards. Definitely worth a watch.
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4/10
Off Writing
vmdecosmo17 February 2019
You can tell the movie was written by men based on the way the female characters acted; it was super distracting and made the characters hard to believe. The acting of the main character was also confusing, sometimes the body has total control and other times she's animalistic and it is inconsistent.
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6/10
Dumb, campy fun
haleyriley971 February 2019
This movie knows exactly what it is and has fun with it! It isn't groundbreaking, however it obviously want trying to be.

There's a lot of cliches and stereotypical characters, but nothing too bad. Two of the main characters, Jennifer and Garrett, were poorly acted at times, but they're tolerable. The humor was cheesy at times, but enjoyable nonetheless (the owlcat's escape and "we lost both of the Brads" being a couple of my favorite parts.) I was pleasantly surprised with the twist. I wasn't expecting a competent story going in to this movie, so that was a little nice. And there were quite a few solid camera shots that were really nice.

Overall, the movie is dumb, campy fun and I enjoyed watching it! It definitely wasn't that best movie I've ever seen, but it's far from the worse! Give it a try!
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7/10
Girl Power, Oddly
LordManhammer6 March 2019
For the first 15-20 minutes, I thought this was the stupidest movie I've ever seen. But then it took a turn for the kooky, in a good way. Well acted and surprisingly funny. I expected there to be many negative reviews on this site from people who watched only the beginning but gave up, so I'm glad to see all the love.

That said, I think many viewers will not experience this the way I did, and won't appreciate its particular humor. But give it a try! There are small moments of refinement that show the makers paid attention to detail, from actress' facial expressions to an addition of music at unexpected moments (like a certain scene set in a frat house).
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5/10
An adequate attempt...
paul_haakonsen8 June 2017
"Patchwork" immediately caught my attention with its interesting and alluring movie cover/poster. I continued on to read the synopsis, and the movie still seemed to sound interesting still.

The movie starts out quite good and does prove to be quite interesting and entertaining. Well at least up until around midway or so, then the movie starts to lose its momentum and becomes somewhat of a more confusing and messy act. And it didn't really recover its former momentum and gained pacing again. And I must admit that from about halfway and to the end then my interest in the movie was fast dwindling, but I stuck with it to the end.

The concept of "Patchwork" was quite interesting, and it was a nice approach on a classic Frankenstein-story. However, the movie just didn't really stand out as being memorable. This is the type of movie that you will watch once, then am unlikely to return to it and watch a second time around.

I will say that the special effects in "Patchwork" was quite good, and there was some interesting make-up on the three young women whom were stitched together into one woman.

Tory Stolper (playing Jennifer), Tracey Fairaway (playing Ellie) and Maria Blasucci (playing Madeleine) were doing good jobs individually and together with their given roles, and they carried the movie quite nicely.

"Patchwork" is listed as a horror comedy, but there is very little elements of horror to be found in the movie, so it is more of a comedy with a pinch of horror spice added to it.

I must admit that I had somewhat higher hopes and expectations for "Patchwork" than what director and writer Tyler MacIntyre managed to deliver. As such, my rating of "Patchwork" ends on a very mediocre 5 out of 10 stars.
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4/10
Wish it had that extra "umph"
jwassdesign13 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
I was rooting for the independent flick but found myself hating the acting of one of the main characters. The concept is great—three minds in one body. The visuals are strong and not too bad for an indie. There are some comical moments and some "whodunnit" story lines but overall I found myself becoming bored toward the end. I did like the acting when the patchwork chicks were trying to work together to get the body to function. If you like gore and blood and low budget comedy/horror with a side of cheese, this is just for you.
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3/10
Millennials Rip Off of Frankenhooker
bizzywiththefizzy1 December 2017
Warning: Spoilers
If, like me, you adore 'Frankenhooker', this film will irritate the hell out of you.

I don't know if it was created with the okay of Frank Henenlotter - I doubt it.

It has the 'date night with a severed head' scene, the crunchy, clicky staggering of Frankenhooker, even a failed attempt to replicate Patty Mullen's iconic facial expressions and the 'mad doctor' looks like he could be the son of James Lorinz. There's even the 'love interest dies at the end and the girl monster brings him back as a boy monster' ending (granted, without the boobs).

It takes what is a classic, brilliant, funny film that's full of heart, and rams it in a blender with everything that sucks about the Millennial generation.

I'm not even going to start on the continuity issues (arm falls off during sex, but magically reappears back on the monster. Arm falls off after a fall, magically reattaches itself, inability to move at all to sprinting in a matter of minutes - the list goes on)

If you've seen 'Frankenhooker' and adore it, steer clear.

If you haven't seen it? Watch it instead. The source of the body parts is far funnier and more imaginative, for a start. There's also no tedious, obligatory 'makeover' scene.
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8/10
Superior Horror-Comedy Mishmash in More Ways than One
carbuff3 March 2019
So, for argument's sake, let's say you've consumed some very potent mind-altering substances while simultaneously suffering from an uncontrollable compulsion to mash together the scripts from "Reanimator", "Frankenhooker", and "All of Me" (with a pinch of "When Harry met Sally" for good measure), what would you get? Pretty much this film. I kept putting off watching "Patchwork", but it was coming off streaming, it was really short, and it had a lot of good reviews. The long and the short of it is that I'm really glad that I gave into my baser instincts. Yes, this horror-comedy is dripping in gore, but it's cartoonish stuff that's not particularly disturbing. Tons of straight-up horror movies show little actual violence, but because they're so psychologically unsettling, they can really wreck a good night's sleep. You're unlikely to have that problem here. This film is clearly not intended to be serious or scary, only shocking, at which it succeeds brilliantly. Toss in a few original twists that caught me completely off guard, and I've got to highly recommend this film for horror-comedy fans. Once again, low budget creativity blows away cubic cash, and everybody's the better for it.
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1/10
Unpleasant and derivative
Leofwine_draca21 January 2018
Warning: Spoilers
PATCHWORK is another silly indie horror film which copies other, better movies. The story is about a trio of young women who are kidnapped by the usual mad scientist and subjected to the most horrific experiments. From the first scene, which openly copies RE-ANIMATOR, you know this is going to be a derivative effort and so it proves. The main source of inspiration here seems to be THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE alongside Frankenstein, of course, but it's all very dark and gloomy, obsessed with torture porn sequences and blighted by limited set design and overacting.
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