Harvey Specter: Let's talk about you.
Donna Paulsen: Ooh, my favorite subject.
Harvey Specter: You know what I think? I think your favorite subject didn't come up to me just to find out why I went to trial. You want something.
Donna Paulsen: I sure do.
Harvey Specter: And I think I might be ready to give it to you.
Donna Paulsen: It's not sex.
Harvey Specter: Then never mind.
Louis Litt: Norma's dead.
Donna Paulsen: What?
Louis Litt: She died this morning taking care of her sister.
Donna Paulsen: Oh, Louis, I'm so sorry.
Louis Litt: You don't need to fake it, Donna.
Donna Paulsen: I'm not faking it. She was a sweet woman.
Louis Litt: She was a frickin' battle-ax is what she was. There wasn't a day that went by that I didn't want to rip out one of her varicose veins and strangle her with it.
Mortician: [Louis is urn shopping] Have you made a decision, sir?
Louis Litt: No, I haven't made a decision, you shyster dealer of death.
Donna Paulsen: Okay, I think maybe we're gonna need another minute.
Louis Litt: No, we don't. I don't need another minute to see that this looks like a pot from Home Depot, this looks like a lamp from Motel 6, and this looks like a goddamn howitzer shell. You are lucky that I don't take this mockery of a final resting place and shove it up your ass.
Charles Forstman: You're wearing a goddamn wire?
Harvey Specter: For someone whose favorite movie is Wall Street, that's got to be pretty embarrassing.
Charles Forstman: Son of a bitch.
Harvey Specter: You may have gotten the better of me 12 years ago, Charles, but this time, you didn't. So remember what it feels like, because I know I will.
Charles Forstman: Harvey, this isn't over.
Harvey Specter: Words spoken by every loser I've ever met.
Donna Paulsen: Today's your lucky day.
Harvey Specter: Why is that?
Donna Paulsen: Because it's the day you get to meet Donna.
Harvey Specter: Let me guess. You're Donna
Donna Paulsen: Oh, you have no idea how Donna I am.
Harvey Specter: Well, Donna, I'm Harvey - - Harvey Specter.
Donna Paulsen: You really think I'd be talking to you if I didn't know who you were?
Harvey Specter: And how exactly do you know about me?
Donna Paulsen: I know about everybody. What I don't know is why this is the first case you ever took to trial.
Harvey Specter: Because it was a white-collar crime, not some drug dealer on a corner, which makes it the kind of case...
Donna Paulsen: ...That puts your name in the paper.
Harvey Specter: You're not just a pretty face, are you?
Donna Paulsen: No, I'm not.
Louis Litt: Look at this. It's her entire estate laid out on paper. She couldn't manage my calendar, but this crap fest she plans within an inch of her life.
Donna Paulsen: And you want me to make sure these things are bequeathed properly?
Louis Litt: You can stuff them in a giant piñata for all I care. I have to go find the perfect urn to throw her ashes off the top of the building.
Donna Paulsen: She requested that?
Louis Litt: No, she wanted them to be in here with me, but like hell I'm gonna do that.
Donna Paulsen: Here's the deal. I will take a bullet for you. And I don't mean that literally. But what you do for me is, when I need something, you give it to me. It's not just a one-way street.
Harvey Specter: Will you also do some actual secretarial work?
Donna Paulsen: Take a look at what I did with your calendar there, hotshot.
Harvey Specter: Holy shit. When'd you get that done?
Donna Paulsen: I told you I'm not like every other secretary. I'm Donna.
Charles Forstman: We're not a good fit, 'cause restaurants fail, and when this one does, you'll leave. So you might as well leave right now.
Harvey Specter: Then how about we bet on it?
Charles Forstman: You're gonna gamble on something to get your brother out of a gambling problem?
Harvey Specter: I didn't say I had a problem.
Harvey Specter: Someday the shoe's gonna be on the other foot, Charles.
Charles Forstman: Words spoken by every loser I've ever met.