I came back to save myself from this. Wait, do I mean you? Or is it "us"? I'll... we'll... figure it out later, I think.
Anyway we have a message for us concerning this movie.
Don't.
Just... don't.
And please remember: this is your attempt to get back the time you wasted on this,
Trust yourself.
You regretted watching it.
The only redeemable feature of this movie is it causes us to create a time machine. However, it turned out to be a one-time-use-only temporal device that left us stranded in the past and the only hope for returning us to our correct timeline is to keep us from watching this movie. I mean, seriously. The movie stinks so bad we got so focused about erasing it from ever happening that we didn't even check the winning lottery numbers for anytime after seeing this stinker. We so wish you had thought to do that.
OK, new plan. Watch this movie but in the time you take to do some proper R&D after being thoroughly motivated to erase having ever seen it please remember to collect the winning lottery numbers.
OK.
We didn't save this draft to our phone before posting it so we had to do it from memory.
So yeah, I think that's everything.
OH! Wait... If you ever see a green van on a Friday night out with your friends, stay away! The only thing you will get from it is a terrible case of the crabs which turns out to be infinitely more fun than this movie is.
