Full English Breakfast

After writing this review, I'm going to get a chisel and hammer and see if I can dig this offencive mess out of my brain! Definitely the worst movie ever made! I know people say that all the time about films they've disliked but trust me, this IS the worst movie ever made. Atrocious - heavily wooden acting, banal dialogue (like a 12 year old trying to write a gangster story) and edited at times like the editor had suddenly zoned out on cannabis! BUT taking the biscuit is the diabolical sound editing, in particular the scandalous post-sync dubbing of the entire dialogue heard in the film. Absolutely laughable Production values.

Manish Patel needs to stop film making altogether before he causes somebody to take their own life after watching one of his hideous creations!!!

I say possibly because after 15 mins I couldn't stand any more, so I find it difficult to compare to the other contender, Get Lucky, which I also turned off after 15 to 20 mins.

I should have trusted the IMDb average rating of 4 but I was conned by the 6 pages of reviews consistently giving it 8 or more, with comments including "triumph", "best movie I've seen this year", "epic" and "Shakespearean". Who are these people? Well whoever they are most of them signed up between 1 month and 1 month 2 weeks ago, just after the movie was released.

If I were a cynic I'd say that someone from the production team has spent a couple of hours creating fake accounts and writing glowing reviews of a s***e movie. In fact I am saying that. The only thing that baffles me is why would someone want to draw attention to such a poorly made movie? All anyone who is conned into watching it will think is that it's terrible.

Onto the movie itself. Wooden acting. I mean seriously bad, totally unconvincing. I mean even to the extent that someone trying to simply look at something looked poorly acted. I still don't know how that can be achieved.

If you've ever seen Big Fat Quiz of the Year you may remember the children of Mitchell Brook Primary School acting out various new stories from throughout the year. The actors in this movie must look to those kids in admiration. That's how bad this movie is.

Do yourself a favour, trust the bad IMDb rating and avoid this one. With most, if not all, of the 60 good reviews twisting average from 200 votes as I write this, the score should really be lower than 4.

Oh my good god! This has to be one of the worst movies I've ever seen! Does IMDb allow makers and 'actors' to comment on their own productions in here? because anyone who rates this over one star (zero would be preferable) must be either of those.

The acting is diabolical, the sound is dubbed on the movie post filming and the 'storyline' a joke - the whole thing came across as a school project gone bad.

If I hadn't lost the will to live, I'd write about the plot and characters, but in fairness, it'd be a waste of time - AVOID THIS UTTER TURKEY - keep your rotten tomatoes to throw at something deserving of them!

I'll be honest I never write reviews for a film, I love most the films I watch but this is the far the worst film I have ever watched it was like watching an old 70's movie without the porn.

Acting from the whole cast is just dreadful and they must have just been paid magic beans or been under the influence of drugs because even a non actor/actress could act better then this bunch of Muppet's.

The black guys is just freaky and looked like a reject from an old 007 film.

The woman actress couldent act for toffee but looked like Tracy Barlow from Corrie

I have wasted 90 Min's of my life watching this film and I'll never get that back so unless you are using drugs avoid wasting your time on this complete and utter nosh.

Firstly, there is no way on God's earth this movie did $3.3million at the box office. I watched this in disbelief. It must have cost a tenner to make, it seemed like an embarrassing uni project. How this even got financed is beyond me. Someone somewhere said "you know what? This is a bloody good script, lets make it and get the cream of British actors to star in it". Well that person deserves to be locked up in a mental hospital. The only good thing to come out of this movie is the fact that it has given hope to all the new up and coming film makers. This is what you're up against folks, the bar couldn't get any lower. I don't know if it was made ironically as a spoof homage to all the bad gangster movies out there, if it was then great work but somehow I don't think it was. However, I urge anybody to watch this to see how unbelievably bad it really is. Take special notice of the sound effects in all the fight scenes. Priceless.