Jersey Shore Massacre (2014)

A typical weekend down the shore takes a bizarre turn as six girls and five obnoxious fist-pumpers become the unsuspecting targets of a deranged killer.

Director:

Paul Tarnopol

Writers:

Paul Tarnopol (screenplay), Goldeneye (screenplay)

Stars:

Danielle Dallacco, Angelica Boccella, Giovanni Roselli

Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
Danielle Dallacco	...	Teresa
Angelica Boccella	...	Dina
Giovanni Roselli	...	Tony
Chris Lazzaro	...	Freddy
Nicole Rutigliano	...	Joanne
Ashley Mitchell	...	Valerie
Christina Scaglione	...	Gigi
Brenton Duplessie	...	Vinnie
Brett Azar	...	Gino
John Michael Hastie	...	Joey
Leonarda Jonie	...	Rosemarie (as Leonarda Bosch)
Shawn C. Phillips	...	Keith
Richard Christy	...	Junior
Sal Governale	...	Dominic
Ron Jeremy	...	Ronny

Storyline

When Teresa and the girls leave their suburban New Jersey salon for a weekend of sun and sin down the shore, they are blindsided by a bizarre twist of events that catapult them from the sands of Seaside Heights to a secluded house deep in the New Jersey Pine Barrens. Frightened by stories of the legendary Jersey Devil, the local population of Pineys and a giant dim-witted neighbor, the girls eagerly return to Seaside Heights where they hook-up with five fist-pumping delinquents who incessantly disrespect all with their reprehensible behavior. As day turns to night, the group converges at a Seaside bar where they are soon ejected for inciting a dance-floor brawl. With nowhere else to go, the group retreats to the house in the Pine Barrens for a night of carnal delights. Blinded by their selfish pursuits, the group remains unaware that their long outstanding debt to humanity is about to be settled - with their lives. One by one, the body count soars as retribution is exacted at the ...

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Plot Keywords:

new jersey | violence | beach | nightclub | defecation | 

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Taglines:

The Situation Just Got Deadly

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Genres:

Comedy | Horror

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Motion Picture Rating (MPAA)

Rated R for graphic bloody horror violence, sexual content, nudity, language and brief drug material

Details

Official Sites:

Official site

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Release Date:

22 August 2014 (USA)

Also Known As:

Massacre em Jersey Shore

Filming Locations:

Newton, New Jersey, USA

Box Office

Budget:

$1,400,000 (estimated)

Company Credits

Production Co:

JSM productions1, Spy Global Media

Technical Specs

Runtime:

88 min

Color:

Color

Did You Know?

Trivia

Sal Governale, Richard Christie and Mark Shaw (AKA Bigfoot) are all members of the Howard Stern radio program.

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Quotes

Freddie: Fat Camp Massacre... this is supposed to be the best movie ever.

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Crazy Credits

There is a scene during the ending credits.

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Connections

References Star Trek (1966)

User Reviews

Jersey film massacre

Part of me was semi-intrigued, being someone who is no stranger to slasher films and has liked quite a lot and the idea interested me somewhat despite being ridiculous. A large part of me was apprehensive though, having heard it was not good and that it looked like one of those cheap and overdone films with a muddled tone.

Which, when watching it, was what 'Jersey Shore Massacre' essentially was. It is not just not a good film, it's an intelligence insulting waste of time. If it was trying to entertain, scare or both, 'Jersey Shore Massacre' failed abysmally on both counts, making the film a terrible chore to sit through. Am not hating or trying to be malicious, it is just my genuine stance on a film that didn't do anything for me as well as many others.

The best thing is Ron Jeremy, who is fun to watch and the only thing halfway decent.

However, the rest of the acting, from particularly the leads, is both overplayed and stiff. In all fairness they were hindered by hammy direction, constantly awkward and limp dialogue and that the film has no interesting or likeable character whatsoever.

Script is childish, flabby and even improvisatory-sounding. The story is not much of one and takes forever to get going, when it finally does it is not for long and it is too late to care. 'Jersey Shore Massacre' seemed like a comedy mixed with slasher horror, and over-emphasises the comedy too much.

Unfortunately, the comedy is not even close to being strong enough to make this imbalance not matter, it is completely witless, childish and so overdone it gets exhausting. The more horror-like elements are a long way from tense or suspenseful, generating little interest even. The kills were not creative and would go as far to say they were too tame, while the things there to by the film's definition "spice things up" (especially the nudity) came over as gratuitous and abused.

'Jersey Shore Massacre' is a cheap looking film that even makes the scenery look tacky. Can't remember anything about the soundtrack.

Overall, terrible. 1/10 Bethany Cox