Army of Frankensteins (2013) Poster

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2/10
Ridiculous
keko922-221 June 2015
I didn't give this a one because I finished watching it. This is one of those movies where you ask yourself, are people this dumb. The things the characters do is well you wish you can reach into the screen and slap one of them. I enjoy monster movies and time traveling but this didn't do it for me. The acting is lousy and I have to mention I am glad it was a free movie. I would have been upset had I been the one to pay for it. A movie you can watch if it comes on free TV in a late late late movie. I really do not know what else to say here because I need to write more lines. There really is not much else to write about without giving movie dialogues. I basically already wrote the obvious. It is a lousy movie and watch it when you have nothing else to do but don't buy it A civil war with Frankenstein's.
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3/10
Like actual Frankenstein's monster, it's an abomination of poorly made sci-fi and horror stitched together, but it's highly ludicrous it might trigger some sympathy laughs
quincytheodore23 June 2015
Within the first few minutes we can see the less stellar caliber of acting and production. Nearly everything is made for ironic purpose, either it's intentional or not. There's so much exaggerated premise and clumsy delivery, it's hard to take the movie seriously and even as parody it can barely register any response, aside from a few chuckles when the film delivers terribly out of place scenes where you can't help but slightly grin.

The plot is a jumbled mix or time travel and a bunch of sci-fi gimmicks, none of these really fascinate. Actors are often cringe-worthy in their performance, although the lead may be funny since he looks adequately like a normal guy. Characters are variety of unsuitable personalities with jarring costume and hairdo, or just simply over the top misinterpretation of the era. Even it plays with historic and scientific backdrop, the film has no accuracy in either aspect. I guess it's a tad optimistic to hope for those.

It will get worse towards latter half, if one can make it pass an hour of characters waddling on a random field and tons of gibberish. The effect is abysmal, literal green screen mess. It has slightly lengthier runtime than most movies but there's really not much it has to offer. You might find some amusement, but it's recommended to invest time elsewhere.
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1/10
Should Be War Crimes Trials...
Peter John Fudpucker6 October 2015
The people who starred in this movie were obviously a troop of civil war reenactment actors. The most expense had to be the false mustaches and beards. These people should never be allowed in a theater or allowed within 50 feet of a camera ever again.

I needed someone to pull my eye out only 20 to 30 minutes into this slop. Can anyone explain why the mad scientist needed a living eyeball to complete his creation? The eyeball was the MacGuffin device! It was the only thing that drove the plot. Honestly, I was very concerned about that eyeball.

Every time someone said "Frankenstein" they acted like they didn't know what that meant. Yet Mary Shelly's novel was published 40 to 50 years prior to this event. Maybe no one had read it? Books were not that popular back then in 1864.

I never knew Frankenstein monsters are lighter than air, since the untethered balloon won't leave the ground until the monster is aboard. For some unknown reason, balloon rides with a former slave, now battlefield nurse, makes it cool you killed all those people because all along you just want to help. But when your Civil War balloon is shot down by World War 2 anti-aircraft fire, you are happy to have a lighter than air Frankenstein around.

The appearance of the video game character Megaman in this movie, was no surprise to me. At this point the drugs the writers were on clearly had taken effect. This reminds me, the writers should not be allowed near paper and pens, especially if the producers returned them to the asylum.

We couldn't end this travesty without yet more insult to history but to the iconic President Lincoln as well. I seem to recall Lincoln was shot after the war. Oh well, it didn't happen in this movie just as Hitler didn't eat a bullet in the bunker for "Inglourious Basterds". Let's make up some more history and have every child in America drooling at the TV.

Yes, there should be war crimes trials... for making this movie.
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2/10
We're from the future and it's time to kick Frankenstein's ass!
one-nine-eighty10 August 2015
Warning: Spoilers
This film is supposed to be a horror/comedy parody however it falls slightly short and is a lot less amusing then the film makers hoped for. The acting is bad, effects are cheesy, narrative is high-school simple, and the plot has more holes than Cheddar cheese - pity because the title alone conjured up loads of potential entertaining visions in my head, oh how dearly the reality of the film let this down. The funniest part of the film for me was in the opening where an American Civil war soldier gets his arm torn off by a Frankenstein who then beats the soldier with the bloody part of the stump, from here it all went downhill for me. Even despite the best efforts to use modern technology and times gone past to create a Steampunk feel in the later parts of the film didn't quite hit the mark for me. Special mention has to go to the costume department for the first half of the film, you will not believe how incredibly fake the moustaches and beards are in this, Groucho Marx would have laughed!

I'm going to use the word Frankenstein a lot as I mention the monster in this film, I do know that Frankenstein is the name of the scientist who built the monster and not the name for the monster. This film doesn't seem to understand this but if I went off on a rant saying that this ruined the film for me then I'd need a lot more page space for a ranty review, instead of that I'll just use the stance the film did and refer to the monster as a Frankenstein.

The story in a nutshell is that the descendant of a Civil War soldier is feeling down on his luck after his girlfriend turns down his marriage proposal. On a long walk home he is assaulted and kidnapped. He wakes up to find he part of a mad scientists experiment and is about to lose his eye ball. During the procedure of building a Frankenstein something goes wrong and the Scientist, his young Igor, the kidnapped man and a handful of Frankenstein's are sent back in time to the American Civil war. At first the Frankenstein's attack everyone but a slave girl manages to communicate with the monster and in effect get him to fight on her side. Unfortunately it wasn't just people who travelled in time but also parts of the lab where the Frankenstein was being put together, on that note the opposition forces in the war managed to procure some serum which could turn the living into monsters. On top of the man vs man fighting it later becomes man vs man vs monster vs new monster, all a bit messy really but it's not hard to follow who is who's side. The war eventually comes to an end but then the hero's of the film are beckoned to Washington to meet Abraham Lincoln who has a mission for them, he wants to stop the newly created monster and the leader of the opposition forces who themselves are plotting with John Booth to assassinate Lincoln. Despite everyone's best efforts to change history it doesn't work. After all the Frankensteins are dead our hero travels back to the future where once again he is turned down for marriage by his girlfriend however this time he isn't as worried as he's grown as a man and can understand the rejection more.

I was hoping for something better than what unfolded on screen, I feel this was a little bit of a let down. It also felt like this was two films tied together, everything that happens from the end of the Civil war leading to Washington felt like a lot cheaper film - perhaps the budget had been blown by then, but there was more green room and CGI in a studio than the first part of the film. I'd go as far as saying the amount of bad CGI and green-screen in the second part of the film is off putting. The star of the show was a young Christian Bellgardt who played the grave robbing, scene stealing "Igor". Despite seeing his back story and following him around the film your affection only lasts for a while as he is yet to fully become a convincing actor.

There was a lot of promise which wasn't delivered, as far as parody horror comedy during the Civil War goes I'd watch "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" any day over this.
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10/10
Fun B-Film Horror
Tom Fowler8 September 2015
Army of Frankensteins is a nice B horror film, shot in Oklahoma and recently released on DVD. Running time is 108 minutes, MAYBE a bit long but not really, as most films today, I've noticed, approach the two hour mark in length.

If you are a fan of Back to The Future, Night of the Living Dead, Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter, or maybe even another B offering from a few years ago, Bonnie and Clyde vs. Dracula, I am reasonably certain you will like this one. The story line is simple and far-fetched enough to be great fun: a young man and an even younger boy are thrown back into time 150 years, right into the thick of the American Civil War. To stretch credibility even further, an "army" of Frankenstein clones are produced to combat the "bad" monsters, all created by a greenish serum brought from the future. The goals of our heroes are to 1. Assist in helping the North win the Civil War 2. Make it safely home to the 21st century, and 3. Meet their ancestors. Do not assume any of this is necessarily in that order.

You do not a need a detailed critique of this film for several reasons, the main one being, this is a low budget B film and should be judged as such. It is grossly unfair to compare such a film to higher budget, Hollywood productions and I hate to see that when it happens, which is, sadly, pretty often. Also, I do not wish for you to know too much more about plot and story. As they say in show business, "Leave 'em wanting more," and so I shall. Instead, I offer comments and my impressions of what is a fun film to watch.

The young boy who played Igor, Christian Bellgardt, stole the show. I am certain his father, writer/director Ryan Bellgardt, did not plan for that, but what a nice surprise for both of them. Young Bellgardt has a future in acting, and I hope he stays interested enough to pursue it.

Oklahoma horror legend John "Count Gregore" Ferguson has a fairly small but important role as the mad scientist, Dr. Tanner Finski. Many years ago, Mr. Ferguson's career path took a turn towards Oklahoma, and here we see what might have been . . . if. John Ferguson could easily have been John Carradine, and it was good to him in a substantial screen role, one he handled very well.

The special effects were pretty good. I liked the occasional use of filtered lens for a rose tint look in spots, and Solomon's (portrayed by Rett Terrell) arm cannon was very enjoyable. The story was meaningful and poignant at times, campy and fun at other times. The beard on the villainous Confederate officer resembles a large piece of steel wool and the scene where the soldier caught a cannonball and threw it back the other way reminded me of an old Republic serial I viewed many years ago. Dialogue was embellished and over the top in a fun way in places, but the underlying theme of the entire story was the young boy Igor's loss of innocence for many reasons not of his own doing.

The story creators toyed around with what I will call, for lack of a better term, a combination alternate/revisionist history of facts pertaining to that era. You will have to view the film to see what I mean. All in all, they stayed true to history, within context of a fiction story.

I am hoping Mr. Bellgardt will add a director's commentary audio to future releases of the DVD.

You may learn more about this film on Facebook. Look for the Army of Frankensteins page.
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6/10
Fun b-budget flick
jackmeat22 June 2015
My quick rating - 5,7/10. Very ambitious and fun filled horror comedy. The writers/creators wanted to hit all genres in full swing and did a fantastic job on a shoe string budget. Good humor, nice gore when needed, hokey action on purpose, this is b-budget quality that should be seen. Enjoyable and I will be keeping this one for later viewing. I make my picks on people to watch, and very rarely am I wrong (last one was the Soska Twins) so keep an eye on Ryan Bellgardht. Aside from some serious camera issues (more the effects really) the quality is quite good. Got distracted at times by the multiple Frankensteins being all hazy, but minor gripe. Enjoy if you can find it.
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8/10
Gore & Giggles
acraigslist10124 January 2014
Warning: Spoilers
I attended Army of Frankensteins at the Oklahoma City "Red Carpet" event. In the opening 5 minutes of the film a man has his arm ripped off by an army of Frankensteins and then is beat with his own bloody appendage. This brought the entire theater out of their seats with laughter.

The lead actor, up & coming Jared Farris, delivered the best line of the movie, "Let's kick some Frankenstein Ass." While John Ferguson (Count Gregore, local OKC Horror Host) was magnificent as "The Mad Scientist" bringing the legend of not just one, but an Army of Frakensteins to life.

BUT... It was young Mr. Christian Bellgardt who played the grave robbing, scene stealing "Igor" that made the movie. The genius of a 14 year old playing "Igor" should not be missed. Find this movie, buy it and enjoy it. And yes, I bought the T-shirt!
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7/10
"It's not right. You can't go around sewing cannons to people!"
Mike_Noga31 August 2015
Warning: Spoilers
The film begins in Virginia, 1864. A squad of Confederate soldiers is on a routine patrol when one of them breaks rank to rendezvous with his lover. Sadly, just as the soldier is about to commence his own Bull Run, the lovers are set upon by an army, not the Union Army, but an Army of Frankensteins!

As is so often the case, an ego-maniacal mad scientist is at the heart of our troubles, in an attempt to reanimate the Monster's corpse, the crazy Dr. Finski accidentally tears open a hole in the space/time continuum, pouring a multiverse worth of Frankensteins into the middle of the American Civil War. Correcting this little glitch in Time constitutes Our Heroes' Quest. I hate to give away too much in a review so I'll just give you a few highlights. This movie has a lot of good stuff in it, including nods to some of the classic Frankenstein films, (as well as Phil Hartman's version) some effective and often funny gross out effects, a plasma coil cannon, a Counter-Frankenstein, discussions on everything from time travel to the nature of true love, Igor played as a wise- cracking yet highly competent 12 year old boy, and Frankenstein's attempt to thwart Lincoln's assassination at Ford Theater.

Not only is an entertaining film with a good sense of fun, but it seems it was also made by a small group of independent artists and therefore could use your financial support. So spend your money on a product that is not only a good time, but that will help these folks turn out more quality entertainment.
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8/10
YOU JUST CAN'T GO AROUND SEWING CANNONS TO PEOPLE
Michael Ledo10 May 2018
Warning: Spoilers
Inspired by true events, an army of inter-dimensional Frankensteins, Alan Jones (Jordan Farris), a little boy named Igor (Christian Bellgardt) and not Bruce Campbell are transported back in time to the Civil War where they fight for the Union army against a Frankenstein created by the south. Solomon Jones loses his arm and has a plasma cannon sewn to it, because a chainsaw has already been done.

The film follows much of "The Army of Darkness" formula. It is campy and designed to be a cult film. Jordan Farris is not Bruce Campbell and this production falls a little short of the classical cult status, but will certainly give you the necessary cult fix until the next great one comes along. The film utilizes a catchy opening soundtrack. The present time era of the girlfriend in the supermarket wasn't written well.

Guide: 1 loud F-bomb. No sex or nudity.
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1/10
Why these stupid directors and these stupid actors are allowed to act???
Submarine Guest House22 June 2015
To all these stupid actors and stupid directors, stop doing stupid movies please. Why? Because I don't believe any one will like to watch it. Unless if they are super stupid weird people with weird stupid psychology. A waste of your precious time to watch such a stupid movie. It's a shame that this called movie. I might say it's not a movie it's a begging act. As you will feel it like: please give us some jobs we don't have money Guys why don't you try to be PERFCT? What's wrong with that? If you have no budget for a movie then please don't even try to make one stupid wasted movie. In my opinion you cannot afford every piece of criticism around you. I have no idea why you guys allow yourselves to act such stupid acting, very stupid and out of date , give me a break you shameful fools, any one support this movie should go to hell with the producers, actors and directors
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8/10
Crazy Stupid Hilarious Fun!!!
Pumpkin_Man11 September 2015
Warning: Spoilers
I was half expecting to hate this and fast forward, but the plot is so bizarre and insane, I couldn't help but love it. It's filled with silly comedy, time travel, American History, the civil war, and Frankenstein monsters...lots of them! The gore is decent for such a low budget movie. The story revolves around Alan Jones, who thinks his girlfriend is cheating on him. He is attacked and gets his eye taken by Dr. Tanner and his boy assistant, Igor. The monster is brought to life, but a freak accident happens, and they are all taken back to 1865, the year of the Civil War. They must not only survive the Confederate side, but must deal with the Frankenstein army clone of monsters. If you love so bad-it's good style movies, and time traveling monsters, you'll love ARMY OF FRANKENSTEINS!!!
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5/10
Tongue in cheek
kosmasp14 September 2015
This d-movie (or even lower in the alphabet if you actually think about the budget this had) is actually fun to watch. Because it knows what it is, and it makes fun of itself and that's a good thing. Take a politician for example, who looks at his portrait and says "This doesn't look like me" (I might be paraphrasing a bit here) - this is tipping your hat to the fact, that the actor actually doesn't quite look like the one he should be portraying and making light fun of that.

The whole time travel thing is muddled to say the least and character decisions sometimes feel forced to move the plot or make something happen that could've been avoided. But remember, this is just a very very low budget movie. Don't be too hard on it or just don't watch it
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