I am an avid horror film addict. I am both a gore-hound and lover of "real" horror films, and I'm telling you, this dreck is absolutely awful. One of the worst movies ever.
This "Hansel & Gretel" film has NO positive attributes. It is the worst horror film that I have witnessed in a LONG LONG time. I'm telling you, as an avid fan and (not to toot my own horn here...) and aficionado of sorts when it comes to horror, that this is pure garbage of the highest order
It is very difficult to tell the world, "EVERYONE will enjoy this horror film!" when I love a horror film.People's tastes just differ too much.
However, on this occasion, there is absolutely no doubt in my mind that NO ONE will enjoy this film. It is absolutely terrible.
Dee Wallace (bless her for trying) is the only part of this movie that kept me from turning it off 20 minutes into it. And I NEVER do that, certainly not with horror films. I LIKE poorly acted and cheesy horror films to an extent, but they have to have something special for me to enjoy something like that. I mean, "Friday the 13th" sequels have 90% cheese and 10% horror, yet the mystique of those victims, the reality of the violence, the care you (sometimes) incur for a character, not to mention the butch Jason himself, make me ENJOY those films. "Hansel & Gretel" has NOTHING but the lowest budget in the history of horror films (maybe other than "BTK Killer" - still the reigning champ of worst movies of all time) and that low budget combined with a complete lack of any serious plot or scary moments shines through, and makes this film unwatchable. Cringe-worthy. Even the violence sucks, folks. And when even the violence is sub-par in a horror film (WELL BELOW PAR), and there are NO redeeming qualities, it makes for an absolute embarrassment of a film. It's these types of films that give horror a bad name. This madness must stop.
Dee Wallace is worth watching for about 10 minutes, but she's being directed by a director who quite literally could be a rhesus monkey, and certainly is not an "actor's director", so even her performance is greatly flawed in many areas, most likely due to the director and editing of the acting she turned in.
Take an avid horror fan's word for it, and don't waste your time on this dreck. THIS FILM IS NOTHING BUT TERRIBLE!!! You've been warned.
19 of 28 people found this review helpful.
Was this review helpful to you?
| Report this