Patrolling the U.S. border with his gun-toting lover, Sartana, after the massacre in Machete (2010), the stone-faced, former Mexican Federale, Machete, receives a call from the president himself of the United States. Thirsting for retribution, Machete embarks on a deadly mission to bring to Texas the megalomaniac Mexican revolutionary, Marcos, who has a nuclear missile pointing at Washington, D.C. Now, Machete and the undercover agent, Miss San Antonio, have to stop a global war, as the shape-shifting assassin, La Camaleón, is hot on their trail. Can Machete's hungry blades avert the impending Armageddon?Written by
The film pokes fun at the Star Wars film franchise. Voz is a fan of Star Wars, and drives a landspeeder (with wheels), then dons a mask when his face is burned by Machete's flamethrower, and Machete and Voz are seen engaged in a lightsaber duel in the fake trailer "Machete Kills Again... In Space". Luz is at one point frozen in "carbonite". See more »
When Machete and Mendez are fleeing in the armored car, they run into The Chameleon and Desdemona and the girls. Once the van and VW van have been wrecked, Desdemona and the girl turn towards two wrecked sedans, not vans. See more »
After all the credits have been shown, two short scenes are shown. One is an outtake of one of the last fight scenes, where an unexpected punch is delivered between two women, the other scene is a very short montage of the presidential character posing with guns. See more »
Somehow even more ridiculous than its predecessor, but not quite as funny.
I love Machete. The character is incredible, the premise is perfect, literally everything about it just screams B-movie stupidity, and it's insanely awesome. I actually saw this movie before the first Machete so I wasn't sure what to expect, and I laughed until it hurt. Seriously, it was everything I wanted in a silly action movie. Machete Kills is somehow even more ridiculous than the first one, this time with president Charlie Sheen ordering Machete to go after a lunatic nuclear arms dealer played to perfection by Demian Bichir, and Mel Gibson wants to destroy the world and colonize space. Yeah, and you thought De Niro playing George Bush was crazy. Mel Gibson is basically a Bond villain in this movie.
This is another revenge story, except this time it's Machete's love interest Jessica Alba who is killed in front of him. Needless to say when President Sheen asks him to go on this suicide mission, Machete isn't exactly in the best frame of mind. Then again, it's f*cking Danny Trejo, so he's awesome at it anyway. The first half of the movie focuses more on Machete going after this crazy arms dealer, with random villains like Sofia Vergara with machine gun tits coming after him. There's also the shapeshifter El Cameleon played by Cuba Gooding Jr, Lady Gaga, and Antonio Banderas. Literally the best plot device to get as many famous people in a movie as possible. Then Mel kicks in during the second half of the movie and that's where it goes full-on ridiculous mode (in the best way, as if it wasn't ridiculous enough before).
After seeing Machete and Machete Kills back to back, I realize the only thing that makes Machete Kills slightly weaker is that the laughs aren't as consistent. Machete had me on the floor 90 percent of the time. Machete Kills is more like, 70 percent hilarity and 30 percent of jokes that either don't hit or are just repeated to the point of desensitization. Still, when the jokes hit, they are laugh-out-loud funny. There are gags in this movie that make the original Machete look like a documentary. Oh, and Amber Heard is the special agent helping Machete this time, and she tries to do an accent every once in a while and fails miserably, but who cares because she's sex on a stick. That's basically the trend in these movies. You try to analyze something and then think to yourself, "Who cares?" It's so damn entertaining you don't have to think at all. Just lay back and enjoy the gratuitous violence, T&A, and everything else you'd want in a ridiculous action-packed B-movie. I, for one, cannot wait for the sequel.
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