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Shutting down your brain in 10... 9... 8...
mau-2620 November 2017
Hollywood studio boss: "Okay, folks, I want you to use everything that's been going through the global press for the last two years: Occupational disasters, storms, climate change. Just mix it together like a salad. And because my son has just turned twelve, I want this film to be dedicated only to twelve-year-old males. Okay, my son is not the brightest and he loves explosions and space ships - preferably exploding space ships - so make something he'll like for sure. Blow something up and stuff like that."

Submissive employee:"But shouldn't we also involve women?" Hollywood studio boss: "Sure. The standard clichés will do fine: a little girl who is interested in electronics and science, although we all know that girls at this age are just sitting in front of Youtube, watching make-up videos. But hey, that's what people want to see. And something about a female special agent kicking balls. That came out pretty well in the' 80s, I'm sure it still works."

Submissive servant:"Don't you think that we are mentally undercharging the audience and pretending that they're all mentally under-exposed?"

Hollywood studio boss: "Hell, they ARE. Oh - and because the whole world laughs at our President, I want the President of the United States to play a role that is better off than this living joke in the Oval Office. I want my son to believe that the President of the United States is smarter than Goofy. At least."
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One of the worst movies I've seen in years
matiasbravojara26 October 2017
I went to see Geostorm because it was the only movie playing on a night where I really wanted to go to the 4D-cinema. Since it was a disaster movie I figured it would go well with the big screen and the 4D-effects.

Right from start I felt that something was off. The dialogue and over all atmosphere felt tacky and the acting didn't seem genuine. This was only the beginning though.

Geostorm is filled with canned dialogue and clichés that will make you cringe. Most of the actors under perform and there's no real chemistry between the main actors.

During the whole movie you feel like you're watching a movie that you've already seen and the tropes used are so in-your-face that you almost feel provoked.

I was thinking about leaving several times during the movie but since I was with friends I decided to stay. During the climax of the movie several people in the audience were loudly mocking the movie and laughing at the absurdity of it all.

Everything about Geostorm was a disaster. It was very predictable and preachy and the director actually made you feel dumb throughout most of the movie. The only OK thing was the CGI but even that felt re-used and tired.

Nobody should watch this movie. It's utterly bad and should be avoided at any cost. I don't even want to think about how much money was spent on this garbage
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Reminded me more of a low (very low) budget disaster movie
denise-3142 November 2017
This was bad.... really bad! I am a big disaster movie fan and can sit through most things, but wow this was really boring.. the characters are shallow, predictable and the chemistry between them stilted and forced.

The special effects were OK, but you just didn't get any sense of the fear because there was no character that developed enough for you to fear for them.

I think a better movie would have been Gerard Butler developing the satellite system and saving the world from Global Warming in the first place.. at least that may have been believable.

I watched Geo Disaster on Syfy the other day and at the time was thinking that it would be a poor mans Geostorm.. but seriously it turned out to be the better of the two films.. that should tell you just how dreadful this film was. It only gets 2 because the special effects were OK.
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Before Watching, remove Brain and put on table
doc212031 May 2018
All I can say is... WOW. I truly Hope Gerard Butler, Andy garcia, and Ed Harris were able to buy their additional vacation houses or pay off IRS with this CGI poopfest!! It reminded me of those cheesy 80's action flicks with the horrible one-liners, yet this lacked any of the charm. If you ARE going to watch this, I highly suggest watching it in a group, while you're all high, and straight Mystery's science Theather this thing!
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Utter bilge.
martinwjordan21 November 2017
This is like a clip show for a movie trope website. UTTER NONSENSE. I would like to wax lyrical about how bad but please just trust me that This. Is. Terrible. Yes, there's left leaning politics which is a bit obvious. But not as obvious as the glaring plot lines and the utterly wacky made up science that an elementary school kid could pick massive holes in. I honestly believe the writers have zero respect for people, expecting them to buy into this rubbish. I will say it again. NONSENSE. Please watch something else, anything really.
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Really really bad movie
dalib0r29 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
I was really looking forward to see this movie after I saw trailer for it. Oh, how I was wrong. I can't remember when have I seen such a bad movie in every aspect of it. Stupid dialogues, bad acting, really shallow plot... And of course, how can we bypass politics from real life... In movie, several countries participate in making the technology for saving Earth, but no Russians, they are bad, they don't want to save planet where they live... Really... Puke... At least I've collected a lots of points on my Cinema bonus card, so I watched it for free...
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Not bad if you ignore the science
joshualawrencepike28 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Just to get it out of the way the science on Geostorm is... not good. It reminds me of The Core or Armageddon. You just have to accept it and move on, I feel it unjust to judge the movie on something that they obviously put little emphasis on.

The basic idea is that is that thanks to global warming we needed a net of weather control satellites (literal a net, as in they are connected in space) to keep weather from being insanely bad. They start going bad and doing stuff like freezing an Afgan village, or cooking part of a city like a microwave. Two brothers try and find out what is going on a fix it. One goes to orbit the other stays on earth. It had two threads and many characters and used them well. It's a spy thriller with a large dose of a natural disaster movie thrown in. I could have done without the environmental message but it did not really get in the way, also the science was so ridicules that you could not really take it seriously.
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Revolution of Traditional Disaster Film: Impressive visuals, well-written characters, involving drama, Geostorm aims for epic disaster-movie spectacle!
hilaryswank201128 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
The review 'Lacking impressive visuals, well-written characters, or involving drama, Geostorm aims for epic disaster-movie spectacle but ends up simply being a disaster of a movie.' is a lie, and anti-China campaign!

This sci-fi disaster film is disaster for poorly made genre films of contemporary industries! Geostorm is truly photogenic one for real movie theaters!

Traditional disaster films depict natural disasters and people around it. And antagonist is nature.

However, this film not only depicts the cut of the age weapon that is outer-spaced satellites which can control geographic phenomenon. That is the most effective weapon than nuclear weapons that cannot use in real war. In this film, true disaster and true evil come from human side. Ed Harris played the antagonist, political extremist who conspires use of the satellites 'the Dutch Boy' as weapon to bring about Armageddon against humans.

The intelligent conspiracy to bring about killing of people is covered in the way of seemingly an accident. This intelligence is quite real in the real political context of this era.

Jake and Max's employment relationship is also typical of this age. Younger Max hires and fires elder Jake even though Jake is his relative...This film's personal development is among Jake and Max's recovering of mutual relationship and cooperation to shut down and clean up the virus- infected geography control satellite 'Dutch Boy'.

I'm personally impressed with the Mong Kok, Hong Kong sequence that is familiar place for me. In this film, Hong Kong proudly represented the goodness and international character of China.

This kind of joint operation is helpful for Hong Kong film industry and its market!

Thank you all for this real blockbuster master piece which something new to us!
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It's not that bad
TheTopDawg24 October 2017
Wow, the critics went to town on this film didn't they.

Although this film wasn't close to perfect, it doesn't deserve such a low score.

My main negative critique was that the writing/screenplay was a little sloppy, although still very entertaining.

But either than that, the performances were decent, the cinematography/sfx well done and the directing was good.

An enjoyable film that I would see again maybe one more time, but certainly not deserving of such a low score.
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Brings nothing new to the table but entertaining at best
kaefab24 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
This movie brings nothing new to the table after Armageddon, Deep impact and other disaster movies.

The CGI is amazing, the story is clichéd and the bad guys are easy to spot from the start but it was entertaining.

It will not win any Oscar but a good way to pass time.

All in all i enjoyed this semi disaster sci fi movie.
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Absolutely awful
hello-3132721 November 2017
What is there to like about this film? The plot is awful, the CGI is dreadful and the acting is shameful. There were times when I was drifting off to sleep, despite the attempt to produce a world disaster movie, the effects fell way short of anything remotely believable. This may well appeal to the mindless folks among us but I think anyone with a few decent brain cells will find this film agonisingly disappointing
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trans_mauro20 November 2017
What a mess...

"Geostorm" is nothing more than a stupid plot combined with a ridiculous name (dutch boy), that artificial and Hollywodian inclusiveness and diversity, precocious girls, sensitive dads, and a Gerard Butler acting as if he was a real all-American politically correct liberal wimp (forget Leonidas and "300").

This is nothing more than a pretty tedious film with limited action and too much talk, it is unbearable to watch.

Geostorm aimed to be a an Asylum science fiction film,but i failed miserably!
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From a scientific standpoint, there's a better chance of Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs happening than Geostorm.
kevinlee-0590412 December 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Geostorm, where the Secretary of State creates god-like weather forces in attempt to destroy the world of all lesser people, and almost does it way too easily. Not only is the plot of this movie utterly dull and without substance, the dialogue and character development were created with very little thought or attempt to create a serious disaster movie. At times, different conversations that go on throughout the movie are completely laughable, for example, the relationship between Jake Lawson (Gerald Butler) and his brother Max (Jim Sturgess). It's almost like they finished writing the movie, and the group of people in charge of dialogue needed some type of power battle and controversy, despite the Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs-type weather scenario. Actually, Geostorm doesn't even deserve to be in the same sentence as Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, because Geostorm tries to make their weather seem realistic in a catastrophic type scenario when in reality it isn't even close. There's a better chance of animals or food coming from the sky than anything shown in Geostorm. Therefore, I'm going to explain in depth why each part of the movie's ability to control the weather and how it acts, is just plain made up Hollywood movie magic. First of all, the way the movie depicts the controlling of weather makes absolutely no sense. To shoot bullet-like pieces from space into a storm to release some form of technology that would entirely dissipate the storm is simply just impossible. Even shooting a bullet into a hurricane does nothing but create a very dangerous object that could strike and kill somebody. The idea that hundreds, thousands, or tens of thousands of these pods that enter a storm and destroy it entirely wouldn't do the exact same thing important to remember. The impact of these pods were only in one location, yet the entire storm went away in the flash of an eye, which is just Hollywood magic. The atmosphere is so big that if something were to affect a portion of it, it would not have an overall effect on the atmosphere as a whole, it would be isolated; that's how the atmosphere works the way it does. The fact of the matter is that even a volcanic eruption or a gigantic nuclear warhead could not deter or even change the direction of some of the storms shown in the movie to evaporate before our eyes. The first freak accident to occur in the movie was when the small town in Afghanistan is frozen instantly, causing everyone there to die instantaneously. For this to occur there would need to be a zone of such extreme low pressure that the temperatures would drop that dramatically, but at this time, there is no such "freeze ray" that could complete such a ridiculous task. Another great freak accident that makes also zero sense is why Dubai gets practically washed away (the water would destroy the foundations of those buildings due to the rocking back and forth) and somehow it is at the fault of the satellites. At some point, it seems like the creators of this movie gave up on any feasible weather patterns or potential disastrous storms and just went for the disasters that made the least sense. Lastly, the entire appeal of this movie is from the creators of the movie entirely making up the term "geostorm", as if there was a term for a massive slew of tornadoes, tsunamis and earthquakes. All of the significant weather depicted in the movie is over exaggerated to the point that it isn't even possible on earth's surface. The fact is that this movie was created as a cash grab for the people who think recent natural disasters mean our world will soon be at risk to far worse, but in reality, it's all just conspiracy theories right now. Although the movie is portrayed as a scientific thriller, it's more of an imaginative world where science and more specifically the science behind weather, do no exist. After asking a current PhD meteorologist who works for if he had any details that would help me right this review, his response was, "I would not subject myself to that mental torture."
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Despite familiar tropes, Geostorm is surprisingly timely, entertaining and with a lot of heart.
BuddyBoy6017 October 2017
In Geostorm, Earth is beset by natural disasters. In facing adversity, mankind developed a satellite station to prevent these catastrophes. While people overcame this problem, another conflict arises when it becomes opportune to use the technology as a weapon for sole global domination.

The setting in which the story takes place, you can say, parallels our own at the present in which we are experiencing technological advancements which perks we use to solve our crises but also create further dilemma as countries individually vie to be the world superpower.

Going to see the movie, I wasn't expecting much for it because it seemed like a so-so movie that's probably been done before only re- released with a "semi different plot" under a different title. But I was surprised by how entertaining it is. There's the timeliness of its subject, there's definitely humor (which is funny but I thought they somehow overdid with some of the dialogue) but this one has also dramatic scenes that would touch you. The pathos really got me emotionally involved with what the characters are experiencing. This aspect I really enjoyed.

The downside, I can still say that it seems a lot of it's contents were borrowed from/ inspired by previous natural disaster/sci-fi flicks such as Day After Tomorrow ( look at one of its posters for instance), Armageddon, and Gravity to name a few. This might be a turnoff for moviegoers who are expecting originality and it will most likely be so but for me, I got over it and had myself a good time in the cinema. It is definitely not the best movie this year or ever but its up there with the good, entertaining ones I really enjoyed watching this year.
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Worst disaster movie of 2017
danielcalegari31 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
THERE IS NO GEOSTORM! Only a family drama and bad acting, some nice CGI effects about tornados at Asia, tsunami on Dubai (shit), cool climate changes at Rio de Janeiro (who are those people there? they don't look Brazilians), a lovely drama about a couple working at government, the conspiracy government that is not fault of the great president of that great united states of America (terrorists are always from other countries).

Tell me why the guy is so invencible? He goes to space, explodes a big station, and can survive everything! But he is a bad father to his daughter... oh no! If someone liked this movie and gave it some good 10 score, of course he was paid for it! No way!
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Sharknado meets Starship Troopers
pestap18 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Clichés and predictability abound. Was this deliberate or did everyone miss the mark by miles? The distance between intentional laughs is great but not to worry as you will find yourself laughing during chase scenes and the heard it before soooo many times canned dialogue stripped from the shelves of the most generic action movies. Think Moonlighting a la Bruce Willis and Sybil Shepard meets any line spoken by Arnold Schwarzenegger as the Terminator. Perhaps this will be the springboard for director Dean Devlin for bigger and better things as even James Cameron had to start somewhere. Save your money and valuable time by staying home and watching Babe: Pig in the City. If you do decide to see this slapstick of a movie I suggest you pass the time by counting how many times you laugh out loud at the cheesier than a Nacho Cheese Doritos Locos Taco dialogue. I lost count.
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pambromley31 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
I found this film to be very sleep worthy, in fact I had to check the plot afterwards as I kept dozing off. Very cheesy American human interest story about the relationship between two brothers was its central theme. The sci-fi was badly thought out and made Gerry Anderson look like an expert. The highlight for me was when the baddie was revealed to be a disciple of Trump. I left the cinema muttering 'we should have invested more in renewable energy'.
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The Special Effects Are The Only Reason Why I Continue Watching this Film
Otakore3 December 2017
Warning: Spoilers
Too many flaws in this movie. This movie is just for entertainment. I'm actually horrified by what they did to Earth to prevent climate change. It's very unrealistic and too dumb.

So his little brother took the position and left his older brother with no job. Note, they kicked the older brother who saved the world from extreme climate change. Then after years, the system messed up. The younger brother harassed his older brother and tells him to fix the mess with the Dutchboy, the technology that controls Earth's climate. The older brother was pressured more because of weird drama from her daughter so he decided to fix it.

Another scrutiny, at Hong Kong, It's apparent that the crushed egg boils in the ground while the car tires don't? The science really failed in this film.

At space, the analyst guy Dunkin is rude and they expect the station not infested with a rat? What an unethical workspace they have in space.

And when Lawson's jetpack malfunction he unbelievably survive. That is so very unbelievable. Anyway, It's called entertainment. I should be entertained.

Another one, the security woman went home, she's the wife of the younger brother, and she just heard a crushed object and she just called "Max!"? Seriously, this is the kind of reaction you'll expect from a Secret Service Agent? And later she found a stranger and then her husband pops up behind her. The husband said it's okay, it's okay, it's okay and she's still pointing a gun at the visitor. That's so hilarious! It's so wrong. It's a very failed script.

At space, they were searching for a high-tech USB device. The security guy just found them, pointing a gun at Lawson. Where Lawson is with the woman helping him search. You know who's that woman is? It's the Chief Scientist who's the boss of the security guy. Unbelievable! The security guy just did that in front of his boss. They should take Work Ethics in Space Station seriously. I guess, the Gun Control Law is not popular in Space Station.

Another one, thunder hitting the Stadium and making the stadium explode. Is that even possible?!

One scene, the President is arguing about Lawson serious accusation to Sec. of state while they're under Geostorm, I mean, where is his mind?

So there's a geostorm all over the world, politically all power country will react. There is a serious repercussion to the US. I guess the sequel will be called Nuclear Storm.

At the end part, they're fishing near a sandy beach shore. Very stupid indeed. Are they waiting for a crab?

This film is so bad. What they're doing is a crime to humanity and to planet Earth. Very very bad.
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Truly awful 1/10
Padreviews23 October 2017
If you've seen other disaster movies then you've already seen this film .

In fact this film was a disaster !

Gerard Butler has history with Olympus has fallen ( better check that ! ) gone are the days when he was in good films such as DEAR FRANKIE or LAW ABIDING CITIZEN .

If you like far fetched outlandish plots where America is great and is the saviour of the world with its environmental credentials intact then this is for you .

If you prefer to be a little more down to earth stay clear .

Pad.A 1/10
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Live Free or Die Hard Meets 2012, But Better Than You Thought..
MickandRorty18 October 2017
This is an action-packed movie that will entertain you; and you will feel pretty okay about what you've just witnessed.

Very nice special effects. The storms were nicely done. CGI was convincing.

Why I think this works better than other "Natural Disaster" films is because they did not revolve the plot around the storms...the storms were just the vehicle of destruction used. It's more like a Live Free Or Die Hard conspiracy, but instead of hi-jacking the IoT, they are hi-jacking weather control satellites.

Good CGI, a fun movie.


*Had Bruce Willis been in it... would have made it an 8.5
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Devastating weather and climate changes!
matthewludtke23 October 2017
I was pleasantly surprised how good this movie really is. I tend to like disaster movies so I may have given it extra stars than some. I gave it a strong 8 for the story line and the special effects. At times there were cheesy scenes but that is just the nature of the beast. Hollywood does it's best making these style movies as real as possible. Looking back at Volcano and Dante's Peak even those were done well for their time. It was nice to see Ed Harris and Andy Garcia in a movie too, seems like these guys take big breaks between movies. So without going on and on I recommend this movie for disaster buffs like myself.
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The epitome of "eye-candy"
eawampler5 November 2017
Warning: Spoilers
In this movie, Geostorm, a disastrous storm develops all over Earth causing devastation throughout. The portrayal of the hazard was very entertaining, any disaster movie fan can enjoy the good CGI effects and a lot of explosions. The human response to the storm varied widely, some attempted to prepare, while others, such as the government, tried to make the catastrophic events appear to be nothing more than accidents. Although this movie was definitely focusing on a disaster taking place on Earth, it seemed more like a cliché mystery. Not only was it scientifically incorrect in many aspects such as the technology utilized, the political interference, and the overall idea of a geostorm, but it seemed that the majority of the movie was not even about the disaster itself, but rather a constant thought process of 'who-done-it'. This movie was the epitome of "eye-candy", destruction, space travel, attractive actors, and explosions all equate to a decent movie, but some of its elements seemed anticlimactic. Personally, I enjoy endings that are logical, even bittersweet ones, but this just turned out perfectly for pretty much everyone, which is nice but not realistic. However, for fans who enjoy happy endings for the main characters and love the disaster movie genre no matter the scientific accuracy, this movie is definitely one to see on the big screen.
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Disaster is correct
Fujiko-san29 October 2017
Warning: Spoilers
When the movie ended, the 8 year old behind me said, "Thats the end? Mom, they didn't show the Geostorm!" and I kid you not, he started to cry.

I can totally relate. We came to see destruction, that kid and I! To see a disaster film! But, frankly, the only disaster here is the script.

First of all, the whole first 45 minutes could have been skipped. Frankly, no one cares about Gerald Butler and his relationship with his brother. (That whole plot line plays out like a lack- luster tele-novela.) And Jim Sturgess is so bad, the less we see of him actually talking the better. (I spent the whole movie thinking how much better it would have been if Sturgess's role had been played by Zazie Beetz. Zazie Beetz as the sister in the white house. Zazie Beetz having an affair with Secret Service agent Abbie Cornish... Now that would have been interesting...)

This is how they SHOULD have done it: Start the movie with the Geostorm clock. Right off the bat: count down to destruction! Weather going crazy! Mayhem!

Gerry Butler arrives to fix it. A German lady helps but everything starts to blow up. Meanwhile, Zazie and Abbie are racing around with the president shooting bad guys!

65% of the planet is destroyed! (For real! Even the dog!) But our heroes still pull it off, even though Ed Harris turns out to be the really wicked bad guy. (Isn't it ALWAYS Ed Harris?)

But surprise! The traitor on the space station is not the French guy! It's the skinny English guy who needs a shower! Gerry finally gets to beat someone up. (But it does look like he's beating up a 14 year old. Its kind of creepy, really.)

After killing the teen-aged brit and stopping the countdown at 1, Gerry and the German scientists are saved by a Space Mexican. (Literally the only good part of the movie is the Space Mexican.)

At no moment do we hear anything about Gerry's feelings. He is childless, so we are spared the horrible acting of the daughter. There is no whooshing, clunking or explosion sounds in the space scenes BECAUSE IT IS A VACUUM. There are some actual futuristic cars to go with all of the space shuttles and the fancy smart phones. Gerald Butler talks like a normal person and not guy in a bar in South Boston. (They could have named the movie "Southies in Space"!) Most importantly: THERE IS AN ACTUAL GEOSTORM!

No Geostorm. No movie. For real.
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aldendsouza13 October 2017
Cheezy dialogues ruined what could have been an okay movie. Bad cgi I can live with but the lines were unrealistic and had me cringing. It's a shame that you can't tell from the promos and trailer because I could have totally avoided this disaster of a movie.

Hollywood Should really have a higher standard set otherwise people are going to miss out on some of the better ones with less marketing budget. This is just plain misleading.
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Enjoyable Sci-Fi Action, worth the ticket price
walter2-407-59739023 October 2017
I noted a few "rubbish" reviews, they seem to have been watching some other movie. This has a pretty good premise (with actually possible science), and some excellent action and effects. I felt I got my ticket's worth, no question.

I would have rated it higher but there is a bit of cheesy voice-over at the end and some slightly clichéd dialogue I wasn't in love with. still, those are minor flaws, and for somebody wanting a good weekend popcorn action movie, you will not be disappointed. plus Butler has a few great lines you will really enjoy.
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